EPISODE 10 - The Sacred Protagonist (Part 1)

*Kibe is in his room*

WAHHHHHHHH! It's bad to get involved in time. I've never seen an anime or manga that did not involve psychological horror or thriller. One such example is Steins;gate.

*He sighs*

Kibe: I thought I finally had it. Too bad. Now two more chances.

Wait, let me analyze this a bit more thoroughly.

Kibe: Hmmmm... I GOT IT!

The main reason that I do not have the role of the main protagonist is that....

Kibe: I do not meet the criteria... My personality doesn't meet the expectations of that of a main character, and because it didn't fit those even of a side character, I was set to a background character.

Kibe: Aren't there people who have much worse conditions? Oh wait, they are probably antagonists or villain protagonists.

But I don't want either of those roles though.

*He smirks and laughs*

Kibe: AND THAT'S WHY MY PLAN IS PERFECT!

I can't believe I have to resort to this, but I have to.

Kibe: I'll become the sacred protagonist, or in other words... A HENTAI PROTAGONIST!

A Hentai Protagonist doesn't require a personality, therefore it is the perfect type for me.

Kibe: Hmmm, but I haven't watched that much hentai lately. I guess it's best to start early and study its tropes and stereotypes. I'll start watching tomorrow night and make sure my sister or my parents don't catch me.

April 21, 20XX

8:00 PM

*His television is on and is watching*

For starters, let's start watching the famous Overflow.

Kibe: Now I wonder why this is so famous among degenerates. Let's start.

9:11 PM

Eheheheheh.

Kibe: That was beautiful. Such explicit scenes. GIMME SEASON TWO!

But it seems like I have to move on.

Kibe: With titles as popular as these, surely there are those that are also infamous.

And its name is...

Kibe: Boku... no... Pico.

I wish I didn't have to watch you. But I have no choice. It is for the sake of research.

Let the watching... BEGIN!

9:49 PM

*Kibe looks at the screen with empty lifeless eyes*

Kibe: WHAT... THE... F* CK?

WHO... WHO WROTE THIS?

Kibe: Oh God, my eyes. They burn.

I can never see ice cream the same again.

*He rubs his eyes out of frustration*

Kibe: I regret watching that. You know what? I-I'm out. I'm taking a bath and cleanse myself from this unholiness.

10:10 PM

I still can't get it out of my head.

Kibe: Sh*t. I guess I'll watch a golden masterpiece according to the degenerates. Shoujo Ramune, it looks like there are a bunch of cute kids, haha. I don't like that sign. Off we go.

*After minutes of watching*

Kibe: Oh no.

*Door opens*

Nakatani: Onii-chan, tim to slee-

Little girl voice: Your yogurt doesn't taste yummy at all!

OH SH*T!

*He grabs the remote and quickly turns it off*

Nakatani: So you're into little girls? I see.

Kibe: W-What are you talking about?

I'll act as if I'm watching some slice-of-life girl anime.

Kibe: That was just found in that particular scene, it's not filled with little girls. If you don't believe me, come see it for yourself.

What are you gonna do Nakatani? Will you do it? Of course, she would'n-

Nakatani: Sure.

Eh?

Nakatani: You aren't the type to watch those types of shows right onii-chan?

*She sits down with him*

Nakatani: So what's the show all about?

Kibe: Uhhhh... Ermmm...

OH SH*T! OH F*CK! WHAT SHOULD I DO?

Motherly voice: Nakatani! Someone's here. He says he came to return something

I'll let him in.

Nakatani: MOM! WAIT! I'M NOT DRESSED!

*She sprints to the door*

Thank goodness.

*He sighs*

Let's carry on.

11:36 PM

Kibe: I-I don't know what to say...

Oh...

Kibe: I didn't expect that...

I think it's time to sleep.

*He tucks himself in bed*

April 25, 20XX

11:47 PM

Finally, I have finally gathered enough intel. I'm ready.

April 26, 20XX

8:15 AM

*He is at school*

Kibe: Based on my research, the simplest way to become a hentai protagonist is to have long hair. My hair as it is has already gotten quite long but not yet to the point that it covers my eyes. I need to make it long, but how.

*Bell rings*

*It is break time*

I searched in my phone. Apparently, I'll need to wait 10 months to get 5 inches of hair on average.

Kibe: I can't wait that long.

What options do I have? A hair growth booster. But I think it still takes months even with the latest technology.

*He sighs*

Kibe: It finally came in handy, eh? Guess I'll have to ask my clubmates to make some, Okada specifically.

4:20 PM

*At the science club room*

*Door opens*

Kibe: Good afternoon!

Kajiwara: KOUHAI-KUN! HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN? IT'S BEEN DECADES! I THOUGHT YOU DITCHED US!

Okada: It has only been a few days. Besides, we gather in the classroom every day.

Sando: And he did ditch us.

Kibe: Senpai, you don't hold back do you?

Okada: So you came here because you need something from us right?

Kibe: Ehehe, how did you know?

Okada: No one ever came back here as clubmates besides us three. They came back as students who needed scientific advancements.

Kibe: Ehehehe, you didn't need to make me feel guilty.

Okada: If you felt guilty, then it has struck you because you did something wrong. I did not try to make you feel guilty but I wanted to make yourself feel guilty. Oh, are you offended? Then let me apologize in advance.

*She bows*

Okada: Sorry.

Kibe: STOP YOUR SARCASM! And what you said earlier contradicted itself, and in the same sentence at that.

Okada: Oh? He noticed? Applaud. Applaud. Congratulations! The monkey finally learned to think instead of play all day, hooray.

Kibe: ENOUGH OF THIS! I came here to make a simple request.

Okada: Oh? And what might that be?

Kibe: Um, Okada-san, can you m-

Okada: You can drop the formalities, you are still a certified member of our club.

Kibe: Fine, if you say so. I want you to make a drug that can increase my hair growth.

Okada: Hmm? Is that it? I can already give it to you since I already made some.

*She takes out a pill from her lab coat's inner right pocket*

Kibe: REALLY? Thank you, Okada-sensei!

Okada: But on one condition...

I knew it.

Okada: If you promise to be my lab rat this Golden Week, I'll give this drug.

*He sighs*

Kibe: Fine, deal.

Okada: Good. We have a deal.

*She hands the drug to Kibe*

Kibe: Thanks.

*He leaves and opens the door*

Okada: Oh, one more thing...

Kibe: Hm?

Okada: If you try to leave me hanging on Golden Week... I'll have you know I have my ways.

Man.

Kibe: Yeah, yeah. I won't chicken out.

* He closes the door*

It's almost like I made a deal with the devil. But no matter, I will become a protagonist in no time.

Note: And so the preparations are complete! Will the young man finally achieve his dream to rule over his own world? Find out next time.

END OF EPISODE 10