Set 267

Valentine Rhymes........

These are entries to a competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line but least romantic second line:

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss

but I only slept with you, because I was pissed

I thought that I could love no other

Until, that is, I met your brother

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.

Of loving beauty you float with grace

If only you could hide your face

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot

This describes everything you are not

I want to feel your sweet embrace

But don't take that paper bag off of your face

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes

Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife

Marrying you screwed up my life

I see your face when I am dreaming

That's why I always wake up screaming

My feelings for you no words can tell

Except for maybe "go to hell"

What inspired this amorous rhyme?

Two parts vodka, one part lime!

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The Secretry's typical day

A Secretary complained about her boss.. She says, "My boss is so sex-crazed. Everytime he comes into the office, I must do the LAPTOP position, and then the DESKTOP position, followed by the SPREADSHEET format.

I must LOAD UP his SOFT DISK into a HARD DISK, so that he can INSERT in my C DRIVE and then the A DRIVE. Then he will ask me to EJECT his SOFTWARE outside my C DRIVE so that he is VIRUS FREE.

Then he changes his mind and decides to ENTER, ENTER, ENTER the whole day till he gets MICROSOFT.