Brutal Mode Engaged
Starting a story is easy! Just drown introduce 10 characters in the first three chapters without describing what one of them looks like. Ryan, Kael, Alvin, King Charles, Nancy, Alovia, Nita, Sasha is a sample of the characters introduced.
Originality - 2/5 - Werewolves who live on Crividia or is it Krividia and why is it referred to as a planet? Is there another planet? And if so why is it only 10,000 miles. What city on this planet do they live? what country? What does it look like? Do they even have grass?
Oh dont worry about what it smells like. Or if its cold. Or what sounds there are. I'd just be happy to know what anything looks like.
Storytelling- 0/5 . But why am I reading pure TELL. There is barely anything shown. Im told how they got from a to be. Told how they feel. Told what they're thinking. Told that they were shouting. Told they were giving flowers. And best of all I was told that the Palace was decorated ... wait for it... not with flowers, not with beautiful decorations draping against columns of marble, not with cauldrons of burning blue fire... .no no with BIRTHDAY CARDS. wtf? And I dont even know what the birthday cards which enchanted everyone look like.
Oh and then I was told people from other clans come to look at the beautiful birthday cards.
Characters - 2/5 Off to a great start Alvin smirks. Okay he's a smartass.
Ryan "Yeah, the species that got to extinction" okay Ryan is challenged.
King Charles - 0 personality. He's just a King placeholder.
It was really difficult to work out if Nancy or Alovia had any personality. they are interchangeable and its all tell.
Introducing so many characters so quickly without describing them or establishing any sort of personality just makes them a list of names to me.
BTW - When does the storytelling start?