July 9, 2019
"You've gotten better," He's breathing heavily from our tennis match, which I won of course.
"I know," I'm smirking now, simply trying to annoy him.
"That's where you say thank you," He let out a small chuckle, but it sounds forced. His eyes are n't sparkling the way they usually do, but maybe I can get a kiss on my way to get the ball. I get up and walk over to him, usually he would grab the ball for me but lately he hasn't. Something's been off, but I don't know what it is. Maybe that's just how relationships end up, dull because you see each other so often.
"Hey, I love you," I look up at him, his face doesn't light up the way it used to.
"I.. I wish I could say the same," As he says these words, his voice shakes. It takes a moment for my brain to process the words, and once it does, he's gone. The world is collapsing on top of me and the grounding is giving in. I feel like I just got hit by a truck. I feel like a part of me died.
Does he mean that he doesn't love me anymore? Is it because I'm too high maintenance? Am I just annoying? Boring?
Once the questions start swirling through my head, there's no stopping them. I don't know who I am without him. He was my rock. He was my knight in shining armor. He was my entire life. Without him.. I don't know how to live.