A Merciful God

"Eomma, you really need to have another baby," Seungjoon declared, his tone edged with frustration.

His adoptive mother turned to him, clearly caught off guard by the request.

"What?" Yuna responded, her voice laced with confusion.

"They need a sister," he explained, casting a sharp look at the twins, who were currently bickering over the TV remote. "They won't stop dressing me up."

Yuna simply chuckled and went back to making sandwiches, unfazed.

"That's because you're so pretty," she teased. "Even if they had a sister, they'd still be after you."

"It's getting old, Eomma. Yesterday, Taemin wouldn't leave me alone until I put on one of your dresses."

"Did he get any pictures?"

"Eomma..." Seungjoon groaned, his exasperation unmistakable.

"Okay, okay. I'll ask the twins to tone it down."

"Ask them to stop it altogether," Seungjoon said as he picked up a sandwich and took a bite.

Yuna watched Seungjoon walk away, still glaring at the twins.

'Why did you have to grow up so fast?' 

Twelve years had passed since Seungjoon first came to live with them. Yuna could still picture that day as if it were yesterday. Kevin Frazer had brought his son, Seungjoon, with him—a small, shy boy who clung to his father's side. The sight of him had taken Yuna's breath away. He looked so much like Nari, her best friend who had passed, that it almost hurt to look at him. The only thing different was the color of his eyes. Despite being the same age as the twins, Seungjoon was shorter, almost fragile in comparison. Yuna had been prepared for the usual resistance from the twins, who never liked sharing their space with anyone. But to her astonishment, they accepted him right away, embracing him as their little brother. And because they couldn't bear the thought of losing him, Kevin decided to stay with Yuna's family at their request. 

Yuna's heart broke when she saw Seungjoon standing silently at his father's funeral, his face unreadable, his eyes dry. Not a single tear had fallen, and that frightened her. She worried that Kevin's death would leave deep scars and that Seungjoon would retreat into himself. But as the twins stood on either side of him, holding his hands tightly, Seungjoon gradually grew into a strong and determined young boy. It was almost amusing to watch him fool his brothers, who believed he was still the timid child they had always protected. But Yuna knew better. Among the three, it was Seungjoon who had a strong and mature mentality—his quiet resolve hidden behind his calm demeanor. 

Yet one thing hadn't changed—he never grew taller. To his great annoyance, he stopped growing at the same height Nari had been at seventeen. His long black bangs constantly fell into his eyes, and every time Yuna looked at him, she couldn't help but be reminded of Nari, who used to grumble about the same thing. And Yuna knew, deep in her heart, that once Seungjoon gained a little weight, he would become as stunning as Nari had been—captivating everyone's attention just like she once did.

An exasperated groan filled the room, drawing Yuna's attention. She looked up to see Seungjoon, dressed in a bright yellow pullover, while Taemin fussed around him with his usual persistence.

"Oh Hyung, I look like a girl! No, I'm not wearing those glasses. They're ridiculous," Seungjoon protested, his frustration evident.

But Taemin was relentless, and as usual, he won. With a pout on his face, Seungjoon dragged his feet, heading to the corner of the room where he plopped down, sighing dramatically. He cast an annoyed glance in Taemin's direction before finally giving in.

"Fine, I'll wear them," Seungjoon muttered under his breath, rolling his eyes.

Yuna couldn't help but smile as she quickly reached for her phone and snapped a picture.

"Eomma.....!!!!"

Yuna looked up and locked eyes with Seungjoon, his glare sharp enough to cut through steel. A murderous glint flickered in his gaze.

"What? I didn't take any photos," Yuna said, her words rushed as she fumbled to hide her phone in the kitchen drawer, trying to play innocent.

Meanwhile, Taemin was snapping pictures like a photographer at a high-profile event, entirely oblivious to Seungjoon's deadly glare. The look that would have terrified anyone else only made Taemin more fascinated, his grin widening as he admired Seungjoon's irritated yet undeniably attractive expression.

"Ah… if only you were a bit taller, you could've been a killer model."

'Literally.' Seungjoon thought sarcastically, rolling his eyes.

"Hyung, that's enough. I'm leaving," he said, exasperated. "Appa, can you drop me off at school?"

Taehyung glanced up from his paper, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

"Oh, Joon-ah, you look pretty."

"Appa, not you, too," Seungjoon groaned, letting out a deep sigh.

"Are you planning to steal someone's heart today?" Taehyung teased, his eyes twinkling with a knowing smile.

Seungjoon paused, locking eyes with his adoptive father before his lips curved into a small, shy smile. "Well… maybe," he replied, his tone serious despite the warmth in his expression.

"Who?" the twins asked in unison, their curiosity piqued.

"I'm not telling you," Seungjoon replied as he walked out, leaving the twins exchanging puzzled glances.

"I can't think of any girl Seungjoon would find interesting," one said, frowning.

"Me neither. He must be pulling our legs," the other added, shaking his head.

As Taehyung drove Seungjoon to school, a quiet settled between them. Seungjoon stared out of the window, lost in thought, until Taehyung's warm hand gently brushed his cheek.

"Joon-ah, be careful, okay?" Taehyung said softly, his voice full of quiet concern.

"Yes, appa," Seungjoon replied, his voice calm but filled with the unspoken connection between them.

Since his father's passing, Taehyung had been Seungjoon's rock, the unwavering source of emotional strength that guided him through life. Though Seungjoon still missed his father deeply, he had never truly felt fatherless—Taehyung had always been there, silently supporting him, no matter what path Seungjoon chose.

"Appa, when do you think Taejon hyung and Taemin hyung will finally realize who I really am?" 

Taehyung burst into laughter. "Probably after their deaths!" he chuckled. "You must be holding yourself back a lot, huh?"

Seungjoon smiled a hint of mischief on his lips. "Well, sort of. They're lucky they're adorable."

Taehyung pulled the car to a stop next to the school bus.

"Got everything you need?" he asked, glancing over at Seungjoon.

"Yes, appa," Seungjoon replied, grabbing his bag from the back seat.

"Will you show me the person who stole our Joon-ah's heart?" Taehyung asked, his tone light but curious.

Seungjoon felt the heat rise to his ears, but he turned to look out of the car window, his eyes scanning the school grounds eagerly. His heart skipped a beat when he spotted Minjun standing by the main hall with Changmin.

"The one in the blue sweater," he said, pointing subtly toward Minjun.

"Oh," Taehyung murmured, his gaze following Seungjoon's finger.

Seungjoon glanced back at his adoptive father. Taehyung's eyes were fixed on Minjun, studying him quietly. After what felt like an eternity, Taehyung broke into a soft smile, turning to Seungjoon with a knowing look.

"I feel sorry for that boy," Taehyung said with a teasing tone.

"Appa…" Seungjoon protested, but Taehyung's smile betrayed his jest.

"I'm kidding," Taehyung said, gently taking Seungjoon's hand and giving it a comforting caress. "Joon-ah, don't make things harder for yourself. If this is what you want, stay as resolute as you always are."

Seungjoon buried his face in Taehyung's chest, seeking solace in his embrace. Taehyung wrapped his arms around him, rubbing his back soothingly. After a moment, Seungjoon reluctantly pulled away, stepping out of the car to help his club members organize their items. This task kept him occupied and kept him from looking at Minjun, knowing that seeing him might heighten his emotions. He boarded the bus and took a seat at the front. As he settled in, he noticed Minjun approaching the bus with his head bowed, lost in thought. Seungjoon closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart. When he opened his eyes, he was surprised to find someone sitting next to him—a rare occurrence since he usually preferred to be alone.

Seungjoon's mouth fell open in surprise, and his ears flushed with heat when he realized Minjun was sitting beside him. Minjun engrossed in his own world with headphones on and eyes shut, seemed completely unaware of Seungjoon's presence.

Seungjoon's heart pounded in his chest. He had never been this close to Minjun before. Trying to calm himself, he shut his eyes tightly and began counting backward, focusing on steadying his racing heart. He continued until he felt his heartbeat return to normal. With his eyes still closed, he thought to himself,

'Han Minjun, will you always make me feel this way?'

He slowly opened his eyes when he felt calm and looked at Minjun from the corner of his eyes.

'Han Minjun, you are going to be the death of me.'

Seungjoon felt a deep sense of contentment, though he struggled to keep his emotions in check. He bit his lips repeatedly, fighting the impulse to laugh out loud like an infatuated fool.

'How am I going to get through these two days?' he wondered, overwhelmed by his feelings for Minjun.

His thoughts were entirely consumed by Minjun, making it impossible to enjoy the ride or concentrate on anything else. Throughout the journey to the resort, Seungjoon's gaze remained fixed on Minjun's face, longing to reach out and touch him. The arrival at their destination was a relief. With a gentle touch, Seungjoon tapped Minjun's arm, trying to wake him from his slumber.

Seungjoon nearly burst into laughter at the stunned expression on Minjun's face, but he kept his demeanor cool and nonchalant. Minjun hurriedly disembarked from the bus, disappearing quickly. Seungjoon, on the other hand, took his time getting off and assisted his teammates in unloading their gear.

They worked for a while, transporting their belongings into the resort and getting everything set up. By the time Seungjoon reached the teacher in charge of room assignments, the process was nearly complete, with only a few keys left to be handed out.

"Ah, Kim Seungjoon, we have a bit of a dilemma," the teacher said with a worried expression. "One of the rooms has a problem, and we're one short. You'll need to share a room with Minjun. He has a double bed, and he's already agreed to it."

Seungjoon's heart raced, but he forced himself to respond calmly. "No problem. Does Han Minjun sunbae know he's sharing with me?"

The teacher shook their head. "No, he doesn't. We didn't finalize his roommate until now."

"Okay, then. I'll go introduce myself," Seungjoon said, his voice casual despite the flutter of anticipation in his chest.

Seungjoon kept a straight face as he exited the teachers' room, but the moment he was alone, he hurried towards the room he would share with Minjun. When he arrived and found it empty, he collapsed onto his knees and let out a muffled scream into the mattress. The sound bounced softly off the walls. After a moment, he lifted his head and said aloud,

"God, I can't decide whether you are merciful or cruel."

Seungjoon let out a deep sigh as he made his way to dinner, doing his best to avoid looking at Minjun. He left the meal early, eager to find some solitude before Minjun's return. Once he was alone in their room, he collapsed onto the floor, his head resting against the bed, and tried to soothe his excited nerves. A grin of pure happiness spread across his face. The thought of sharing a room with Minjun was a dream he hadn't dared to hope for.

Seungjoon quickly stood up as he heard footsteps approaching from the corridor, making an effort to appear casual. The door creaked open, and Minjun walked in, seemingly unaware of Seungjoon's presence. When Minjun heard Seungjoon's voice, he froze in the doorway.

"Minjun sunbae, there wasn't enough room for everyone. The teacher assigned me to your room since you have a double bed. If you'd prefer not to share, I can sleep on the floor."

The silence that followed felt like an eternity before Minjun responded.

"It's alright. I don't mind sharing. It's too chilly to sleep on the floor. You can choose which side you want; I'll take a shower first."

Minjun responded quickly, locking himself in the bathroom. Seungjoon collapsed onto the bed and gazed out at the glass wall, watching the sunset and feeling the chill in the air. Oddly, seeing Minjun's initial panic had a calming effect on him. He sat on the bed, slipped on his headphones, and let the music wash over him. He looked up as the bathroom door clicked open, and Minjun emerged, visibly shivering. For a moment, Seungjoon was paralyzed, but then a surge of frustration bubbled up inside him. Fighting the urge to scold Minjun, he took a deep breath and began to dry Minjun's hair as he weakly protested. Carefully, Seungjoon tucked him into the warm sheets, enveloping his shivering form in a tight embrace, channeling his anger into the warmth of his hug. He gradually loosened his grip as Minjun's protests faded away.

"Sunbae, I know you might feel uncomfortable and embarrassed right now, but please try to bear with it for a while. Otherwise, you could end up seriously ill," Seungjoon said in a gentle tone, his voice filled with concern. He held Minjun close until the shivering subsided and Minjun began to relax. After a few minutes, Minjun cleared his throat and spoke softly.

"Seungjoon... could I ask a favor?"

"What is it?"

"Could you call me hyung?"

Seungjoon paused, considering for a moment. In his mind, he thought,

'Can I call you Han-ah instead of hyung?'

But aloud, he said, "Sure, hyung."

To make Minjun feel more at ease, Seungjoon pretended to be asleep. He felt the soft touch of Minjun's kiss on his head and watched as Minjun quickly drifted off, clearly worn out by the day's events. Seungjoon carefully removed his arms from around Minjun, then pulled him closer into a comforting embrace, resting Minjun's head on his arm. Resting his own cheek against Minjun's, Seungjoon sighed deeply. Noticing the tears on Minjun's face, he tenderly wiped them away and placed a gentle kiss on Minjun's closed eyes. In that moment, Seungjoon felt as though he was finally breathing freely for the first time as if he had been holding his breath all along.

'So, I've been missing you all my life...,' Seungjoon thought, his voice soft and affectionate. 'Han-ah, it was really foolish to take a cold shower in this weather, but I'm grateful you did.'

Seungjoon tenderly kissed Minjun's lips, feeling his heart and soul melting away in the moment.

'I'll consider God merciful,' Seungjoon said as he hugged and caressed Minjun's head while Minjun slept soundly.