Chapter 12: His Voice

'I feel so stupid'

'Why am I crying?'

'Especially in front of him'

I thought as I sobbed harder, the image of me ugly crying only made it worse.

Matt asked me if I was okay to unlock a floodgate I didn't even know was closed.

I had looked down, hoping that the darkness would work in my favor, making it so he wouldn't see my tears but once it started it just wouldn't stop. Soon enough tears were rolling freely down my face; a full-on bawling session. 

What he did next caught me by surprise. Reaching over he unbuckled my seat belt and pulled me into his lap. 

'Oh, I wish I could enjoy this moment '.The moment of lust was quickly erased by another round of tears. 

'I knew I wasn't okay but I had accepted that I had accepted that I'm not suitable for his lifestyle' 

'So why am I crying?'

Matt began to gently rub my back, in an attempt to comfort and calm me, but the gesture only made it worse. At that moment I realized,

'I'm sad because I'm breaking up with him in my head'

As if to prove myself right another round of sobs came. I was now to the point of hyperventilating. 

Matt just held me closer. I didn't, I couldn't look at him out of fear that my tears would never stop. 

Pushing myself from his embrace I slid over back to the passenger seat. 

I steeled myself and wiped the tears from my eyes, though they continued to pour without looking at him I allowed the words to stumble out. 

"Thank you for everything. Although it's been a short time. I'm glad I met you."

I paused, taking a deep breath.

"I'm not cut out for the lifestyle that you have and I don't want to be in danger, please stop coming to the bakery," I added. My voice is a mere whisper.

What happened next left me beside myself.

"Why?" I heard a muffled voice asked from behind me. I looked around and it was only Matt and I in the car. 

'A ghost?' I thought to myself.

I chuckled at the ridiculous notion, shaking my head at the idea but then I heard it again but this time the tone was a bit more impatient.

I did as any rational person would have done. I screamed.

[What's wrong?] Matt showed his question on his phone.

"You didn't hear that?" I asked him. Still looking around the car for the source of the question.

He didn't respond. He only sighed. 

"There's a ghost in your car!" I screamed. 

[There's no ghost]

"Then was it you" I asked, annoyed that he wasn't taking this seriously. 

'I'm being haunted'

'Is it because of ghosts like virgins?'

[It was me]

"You can talk!"