Ice Cream
Around the Grey House, the night crickets sing. All is calm...and yet, the lights are on inside.
Inside, a music system's playlist surfs itself, to a classic Lou Bega track. It plays it.
In the Oval Office, several barrels of liquid fuel light themselves. They're set ablaze. Just above them, the chairman of the Jackass party hangs upside down, hog-tied and thrashing. He's in for a hot time tonight...
The music begins. Inside Cyrus's tank, he and his tank mates have donned fedora hats. Telekinetically, they spin an ornamental walking cane around the tank. While swimming in place, they sway to the music. (None can dance. They don't have legs...)
During the music, the Head Jackass is broadsided with spray hoses. He's clobbered by trip hammers, which hit him from two sides at once. He's shot up with tasers, and stunned with minimal dignity. Cymbals are clapped very close to his blindfolded head...
In the tank, Cyrus and his mates have a party, while watching their boss's enemy get tortured over barrels of oil. They're all really rocking these fedora hats...and that cane, that they spin around the tank, that they twirl like a baton, and won't put down...
Together, the elephantfish sway, and flirt to the beat of Lou Bega's "Ice Cream." Before them, all of the federation's most formidable influences get tortured to the beat, and a billion other things that the elephantfish can think of...
During the song, the Head Jackass gets hammered the hardest during the "whoop, whoops." He must be terrified. He thrashes, and orders, through the gag, to be released. He sounds just like an actual stubborn jackass, when it refuses to do any labor after its master treats it badly... But of course, the Jackasses are in the professional business of treating the Heffalumps like crap. And therefore, the Heffalumps, MUST, by the laws of fairness, reciprocate...
It's what voters expect, after all. Plus, the elephantfish get to have fun, while house-sitting the Grey House...and, quite possibly, overthrowing the federal government while its usual leader is in protective custody.
And it looks like the elephantfish's stay on the NAF throne has been prolonged. From what they've heard, the DHS is out of likely suspects; and until they find the trail again, the President can't come back to his life without expecting it to be taken from him as soon as his enemy finds out, from the press, that he's back on duty, and has re-painted the target on his back from before...