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The Meme Train

Little thing I decide to write for the fun memes, don't take this way too seriously, if you wanna vote, vote then. Just don't act like an ass. Also the book isn't for anyone of a prudish nature, so yeah, if you are then this ain't your cup of tea, hell it's not even tea, it's a full cup of espresso. Oh yeah, the R-18 tag is there for gore, I don't know know how to write good smut, and I don't plan to write smut in this book any given time. ____________________________________________ Take a look at me for example: I died, that was painful. I got chosen to be entertainment for some dude that I never got to even meet. I cheesed the "golden finger" I got and made an entire world go straight to fuck all. Now I'm just casually being the madman that everyone says I am. Oh, and fuck cultivators. I don't like their kind around here. What do you get? Some random kid being a fucking lunatic that's what! Take a read if you want! You'll definitely regret it! (Disclaimer, I own nothing aside from my MC and any OCs I may cook up, the cover was from google, I just searched Thomas the Thermonuclear Bomb and I found Thomas the Thermonuclear Apocalypse, I came looking for copper and I found gold. Also this is a work of fiction, any names that are placed in here are yadda yadda yadda you know the drill, anything in here is coincidental.)

AntiLoliLewding · Anime & Comics
Not enough ratings
325 Chs

I AM THE ONE

/Frank POV/

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Well, after listening to that little shit, it's pretty fucking obvious that the issue that I so graciously brought myself into is otherwise known as another motherfucking sect, on this motherfucking continent hunting another pair of motherfucking children. Samuel L. Jackson would be rolling in anger if he ever had to go through something like this for another fucking time. {Motherfucker.} I thought since there isn't all that much that I could do to ensure that these kids get to live.

(Well, sucks for you.) I said after listening to his sob story as I then got up and checked the house's condition again. Not much food left in the fridge, that sucks ass. (But won't you help us?) he asked as I stopped and turned around and looked at him confused and slightly pissed off. (Kid, the reason why I am living, in a house in the middle of nowhere is that I don't have to go and look at the bullshit that is the "martial world". Let me simplify this, I HATE CULTIVATORS.) I said with a shout straight at him as he winced a little.

I took a deep breath to calm myself down and then said inc more to him (The only reason, why I am tolerating you and your sister's presence in my home, is that I don't have enough fucks to give about you two.) I said as I then rummaged around and then sighed. I could stay here for a few weeks and then bounce since this place sucked absolute cock.

There weren't any well known spots for me to hunt and honestly, I really don't wanna have to take care of these two. The boy then came to me and spread his arms wide open, blocking my way out. He then said (You are to hel-) he said as I backhanded him into the wall, grabbed his head and then bashed it three more times and then threw him down. (I SAID, I HATED CULTIVATORS, THE WAY YOU SPEAK, IS LIKE ONE, YOU DENSE LITTLE SHIT!) I shouted straight into his ear as I then used a little bit of Argent and punched his gut. He coughed a little vomit and then I threw him down one more time.

I took another deep breath as I then looked to see his little sister looking at the two of us in fear. I looked down at him and grabbed him one more time. (If you think that words are useful to a situation like this. If you think that your names are THAT widespread, or if you think that you could fight, I'd like to give you some advice kid, never, and I truly mean never, assume that someone is weaker than you.) I said as I then got him up, patted his shoulder to get rid of the dust.

(Don't take the idea that if they're weaker in cultivation, that you could kill then easily. Remember that you're fighting something that has life, feelings, emotions. They'll do anything to live, and whatever you do, don't try and kill anyone in broad daylight. Make sure to kill in a deserted alleyway.) I said as I then packed up most of my things and then got out of the house.

(The battery will only last for you two for so long, and the code to remove it is 5286, the food is going to run out, and you have about three more days before you actually have to start worrying about it. I don't care what your names are, and I don't care where you're from. You're kids, but you need to grow up to survive in the wild, and in civilization.) I said as I then grabbed whatever I had left and placed it in my inventory.

(See you if I see you.) I said one last time to ensure that they know that I'm gone. Great, the first safehouse that I have, and now I'm on the run again. Ain't that fucking poetic. Well, I picked a direction that wasn't the one that I came from and started to run once again. Did I want to proactively get hunted down by gods of this reality? No, of course not. It's not time to go on a killing spree for them. I still need to go and do other stuff so that nothing fucks up hard.

But now, I still have to keep my eyes on my current situation. I kept running for what seemed to be a couple hours and then I stopped by a river. If I go either way, I'll end up finding someone's village or nothing, since there's the possibility that this thing does absolutely no good due to it having monsters in its waters. You know what? That actually may be possible.

{Well, I guess one drink won't hurt anyone.} I thought as I then walked over, bent down to drink, and noticed that there was a shadow behind me. I quietly pulled out my Glock and stood up. (Do I know you?) I asked as I got ready to have a fight. (I believe you do.) the voice said as it sounded like a woman. I don't wanna describe it since that's a waste of time. (So what's a girl like you, doing near a river stalking a man who's just come for a drink?) I asked as I quickly pumped as many enchants as I could onto the damned thing. Unbreaking 63000, Power 400000, and let's not forget that I have something else needed for it. Infinity.

(I would like to ask you that.) she said as I stood up and turned off the safety of the gun. (I don't think that you would like my answer lady. It's not something that most people would think of.) I said as I then slowly turned around and cursed in my mind {DID IT HAVE TO BE YOU?!} What was standing in front of me was the same woman that had a little crush on past me, Gong Yuxian. (Hmmph, such arrogance from a man who dares to steal the body of the man that I loved!) she said as she then conjured up ice weapons in her hand. (You got the wrong fella lady, I ain't a grave robber.) I said as I then shot at one of them and they shatter.

(How's that for a balance update?) I said as I then aimed for her leg. She didn't move but she did glare at me. (To think that an Elementary Profound would have the gall to try and steal your body, it truly is a mystery how I fell for you Frank.) she muttered to herself as I didn't show any expressions that would give away the fact that she was talking about the me from the past. (Alright lassie, I suggest that you walk away, I ain't no grave robber, and I never touched your boyfriend's body, so do me a favor and vamoose outta here.) I shooed her away using the pistol, and then realized my mistake.

{Fuck.} I thought as she then widened her eyes as she tried to say something. I quickly went creative mode and typed in:

[/effect @s invisibility 1 99999999 false]

The effect was instant as I quickly double jumped and flew away from the area. Shit, she's actually been watching over my dead body. Well, that's not something good for me. Oh fuck, oh boy. Well, guess I have someone that wants to really see me that badly. {Oh god fucking dammit Anti, I just wanted memes and you bring me a fucking woman that has the hots for me. Not fucking cool asshole.} I thought as I then sighed and wondered what should I do now.

She had a good cultivation the last time that I saw her, which was at my technical death bed. She wasn't a Sovereign but she was at least Throne again. Well, I mean, I don't even know how she got to that point, but well, not my issue. I could just ride it out at that city that Xiao Che lived in but I don't wanna bring myself into that political clusterfuck otherwise known as the Xiao clan. If I do head there, I could have the chance to witness his mom swapping him with another kid or something like that.

Well, what was that kid's name again that Yun loved? Ling'er? Welp, I don't plan to become a sailor just yet and honestly speaking, I want to just get away from the area so that's what's I'll be focusing on for the moment. After flying for about three more hours or so and whistling to myself, I then tried to think where exactly the fucking city that I owned was at. It turned out that it was in the fucking sky. That's right, it was running on nuclear engines, and it was flying in the sky. Oh my fucking god that's so fucking stupid.

You know what? I'll stop thinking that hard and just try my best to get there. There was a council and the past me really went and called it the O-5 for the reason that there were only five members there. The four below him, and then him at the top. Wow, just wow. And here I thought that he'd use democr- oh wait he is, the only real purpose of the election is for the guys below him. He only decided to step down due to his health declining. Well that's not sad or anything of the sort, of course not. Oh fucking boy, I guess that's my current destination. It has a set flight path for it to follow and a computer that charts new paths for safety's sake and all that junk.

{Hmm, I gotta wonder though, why a floating city? I mean, you could stick a lot more guns on the bottom, but that's just about i- and yup, that's the reason as to why there's a floating city. I'm kinda disappointed that he preferred the American method rather than the normal "diplomacy first, shoot later" method.} I thought as I then tried my best to find it. The last chart that I saw before "I" died was that it was supposed to come over somewhere a couple hundred miles from here.

How the fuck did I have an idea where to go? I don't fucking know, you try getting a reason when I don't understand how he manages to memorize the fucking flight patterns in conjunction to the fucking land.

Well, waiting is the one thing that I know how to do really fucking well, so I guess I'll just do that instead for now. Thank fucking god that I have steak and golden carrots for me to eat, plus if I get the recipe right, I could just make the saturation suspicious stew for me to drink up.

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/Gong Yuxian POV/

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It has been a few weeks since the man that I respected and loved had died, and I was on my way to pay respects to his grave. He wanted to be buried within the dirt that he so carefully toiled with his two hands since we met. I truly felt something from him when he kept taking care of me when he didn't even known who I was. That is, until he found out who I was.

The odd thing that I learned was that he knew that I was from the Frozen Cloud Asgard sect, but he didn't know which of the disciples was I. I didn't really know what to think of that at first, until he saved my life. Albeit, in a much more odd way that I had anticipated. He used a pipe so that he wouldn't lose his virginity to me. I have never felt so much anger before until he started to explain that the very scrolls that my mistress had given me was flawed and as he said it (Completely and utterly dog shit.)

I didn't know that there were actually people in this world that hated cultivators so much that I asked him the reason why he didn't like them. His explanation was very insightful. The greed that some of them go through just to cross a single "step" has crossed my mind once in a while, but I never thought much of it. It was only until he kept showing his expressions of hatred that he continued on his litany of curses against our creators for allowing such a thing as Profound Energy to exist.

I had initially thought that he was angry because he had been born with minimal Profound entrances, but he showed me and I was shocked. He had over ten opened and he was still just standing there in Elementary Profound. I had half a mind to go and berate him for what a sin he was doing, until I saw his expression and realized that it was the very way that I think that he hated about us.

2186 words. I had to write this on the exact same day as the last one since my timer wasn't working correctly, anyways I wanna know of what I should do with Gong girl, she's not a love interest, she's just more of a friend type character. Anyways and always, I'll see you guys, on the dark side of the moon! Peace out everybody! Goodbye~

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