His and hers beginning.

Lazaro opened his eyes to a world of glimmering lights and overwhelming extensive blackness. The lack of air and the weightlessness of his body told him his location.

'Adrift in cosmos?'

He sensed his body with his conscience, and although the thing that fat thief sprayed on him healed his body, his physical meridians and dantian were crippled. In such a way that it'd follow him through at least one reincarnation.

'Everything was perfect, I lived, struggled, lost, won, and enjoyed. It was the perfect time to die! By fairy tale standards, that was complete life... and I could finally, try and find her again...'

"Don't lie to yourself, I can feel your regret."

Lazaro moved his eyeballs and found a blonde woman of around thirty years, wearing a swamp green armor in pieces, she was in a disheveled state, even missing an arm. Yet the exuberance of a deity still emanated form her.

'A goddess huh?' A cold glint flashed by his eye.

The goddess continued.

"From one to eight, you struggled in an orphanage that used kids as workers, but when you reached nine, you decided the girls were too thin and bony to hug comfortably and too worried with survival to accept being your girlfriends, so you decided to build a different kingdo-"

'I wooed quite a few though, we were bony but our hearts were sweet and warm. Oh, the youth.' He reminisced

"..."

"...Continuing. You found Lina coning people on the street and took her as your wif-"

'She conned me too. Pretending to be all lovely and sweet... only to steal my mercenary group's supplies and weapons. oh, she was so daring...of course, I took it back from her, with interest.'

A sudden shock cursed his whole body

"Stop interrupting me!"

"AAAAAHH WENCH!"

"I'm a god, you bafoon! how dare you curse me!?"

"Are you crazy!? Damned wench!"

Another shock ran through his soul

'Aaaaaah! Wench! Wench!'

"Ugh," She gave up, "Anyway, my point is; you warred and fought your whole life, but only got to enjoy five years of your achievements, and even then you were mourning the death of Lina and your other companions, so don't pretend to have no regrets."

Seeing no reaction from him she assumed an awe-inspiring pose with divine light enriching her image, she smiled. "I took pity on you and decided to bestow you the chance to actually live. All you need to do is become my champion."

Her halo shined and her smile enchanted.

'Pfft, no thank you.'

Her smile stiffened, from the manner he rejected it, she imagined that if he could move and spit, he definitely would've.

'What's wrong with him!? I'm offering him life again!'

She looked at him and saw he smilingly cheaply at her. She wanted to cut his head then and there.

"If you don't agree, I'll take my leave and you'll die in space."

'Not what I planned, but I'm fine with it.'

His eyes were smiling.

'This fucker is withstanding enormous pain only for the sake of showing that cheap punchable expression!' She thought.

'Now, Rebbeca, we established who's in demand and who's in need, and I don't do things for free. So, what can you give me?' If he could arrange extra protection for his people, he didn't mind making a deal with that which he despises.

She clenched her teeth. She felt like putting on an imposing stance and force a divine decree on his soul, but she knew he'd rather cease to exist than to comply.

"I'm Hyera of chaos, a goddess of war! Not Rebecca!"

'Little Becca, calm down, get to business.'

"MOTHERFU-"

'Becky, you're the one who wants a champion, be a good girl.'

"FINE DESPICABLE BEING, I'LL DO IT MYSELF AND YOU WON'T GAIN SHIT! TO HELL WITH YOU!"

She scoffed with frustration. The man in front of her has obvious prejudice against divinities, in the short term, she wouldn't get anything out of him. She had to go all out.

With an annoyed snort, she let go of herself. The divine glow dissipated together with her form. leaving only a small ball of yellowish light that exuded pressure, it slowly floated and disappeared on his chest.

Another shock, ten times stronger, coursed through his whole body and soul. Within two seconds, his minds succumbed to darkness.

As his last thought, he sighed. 'I just wanted a rest...'

****

The grassy ground trembled fiercely, heat like in the decade long drought on his youth bothered his body and the smell of rotten eggs assaulted his nostrils.

His instincts kicked in, Lazaro snapped his eyes wide open and jumped to his feet. dozens of meteors streaked across the sky, leaving red clouds behind.

'A natural disaster.'

With no enemy nearby, the instincts that kicked in faded and Lazaro fell on his back, the short grass tickled his ear.

"Are you just going to marvel at the sky, and wait for one of those things to hit you?"

A warmth came from his broken dantian, Lazaro chuckled as a ball of fire streaked right above him. 'And I thought that I'd never been able to get even with you for taking me out of my place of death.'

He observed a streak of red in the distance and conjectured its trajectory.

"NO, WAIT, YOU MADMAN, WHY THE HURRY TO DIE DAMN IT!? WEREN'T YOU INTERESTED ON A DEAL?"

'Luckily there's one who'll fall close, little Becca.'

He withstood the pain of moving and stood where he thought the meteor would fall.

'No deal little Becca, you became just a spark of the sea of fire you were, there's nothing you can offer me like that. Besides, killing a god is the only thing on my to-do list that isn't crossed.'

The meteor was halfway in. it's heat already caressing Lazaro's skin.

"I'M A GODDESS! I KNOW HOW LIFE AND DEATH WORKS! WHERE THE SOULS GO WHEN THE BODY DIES, YOU CAN REACH THE PLACE AND REVIVE THOSE WHO DIED OR FREE YOURSELF OF YOUR BAD KARMA!"

"Exactly, you're a goddess." He said and waited patiently. 'Quite a slow fellow, this meteor. Is it because of wind resistance?'

'Will I really die here with this mortal!? After everything I've been through!?" Hyera despaired.

The meteor came crashing down, he smiled, she raged.

The earth trembled.