Chapter 1

"Please come again!" you said as you slightly bow down to the customer in front of you. You are currently in your saleslady job. It was one of the 5 part-times you work to survive in college since you were an orphan and were abandoned by your parents in front of a church which later on became your home. Yes, you grew up in a church but after being molested a few times by a couple of priests, you managed to get out of that shithole and decided to work to survive. So here you are, working 5 part-times a week to try and pay off your student loans and other necessities in life.

"Hey, have you heard? The new avengers' movie is coming out" your friend, (f/n) said. You look at her with a surprised face.

"Really? Maybe I should go watch it when it releases" you said, thinking about what will happen in the new movie. You didn't watch the last movie that was supposedly about Thor but your friend was kind enough to explain it to you when she watched it so you kind of got the idea of what had happened.

"So? You're going to watch it with me?" Your friend asked, making sure you were coming with her.

"Sure," you said and nodded as a reply which made your friend squeal in joy.

Your part-time ended and it was time for you to return to your home, well, at least you call it home but really, it was barely even a room. Yes, you live in poverty but at least you were surviving and actually breathing. It was better than being dead, which something your parents probably hoped for when they left you in that church full of pedophiles.

You placed your bag on top of the bedside table and sat down on the bed while your wall was only a foot away from you. You exhaled heavily and raised your head before closing your eyes, something you got used to doing ever since you found out about soulmates. You found out about them when one of the nuns had told you about the legend of soulmates.

The legend stated that back then, two souls resided in one body and some of the souls weren't happy with their pair so they would often fight which would harm the body that they reside in, so to teach them a lesson, God took one of each pair that resided in a body and made them a new one to teach them a lesson. God said that they could only feel whole again when they meet the other person where their soul-pair resided in. However, God became merciful and he gave the soul-pairs the ability to meet each other through dreams until they meet in real life. That's what the legend said but what the nun told you was probably incorrect and full of misinformation since she is a nun and she is loyal to her God. You used to believe in God when you were but a tiny child but when the other priests started doing unholy acts to you, you realized that God is not that merciful to save you from the priests that keep on harming you that resulted in you being terrified of old bald men as you grew up.

You sigh again, trying to feel your soulmate if you even have one. Ever since you were a kid, you never met your soulmate in your dreams, no matter how hard you tried to search for them in your sleep. It's only just darkness and loneliness. Great, one more thing to be angry to the world about. You were an orphan, you were raped by people who you thought should have been your parental figure, you probably have no soulmate, and then you have thousands of debt in college. What more could life give you? Honestly, it all is just so unfair. You've got all the unluckiness in the world, don't you?

You slowly calm down from your rage and then ended up falling asleep while still in your work clothes.

The next morning, you start to get ready to watch Avengers: Infinity War with your friend. Both of you went to the mall and bought your tickets. You didn't bother to buy snacks since you wanted to save up money and snacks from the mall is honestly very expensive. But your friend was kind enough to share her's which made you think that you got lucky at one thing in life.

The movie started and the entire theater got silent as they anticipate what will happen in the film. You take a bite of the popcorn that your friend offered you as you got to the part where Thanos asked Loki about the tesseract. You hear your own pulse ringing in your ear as you fear what happens next. You gasp silently, with your hand covering your mouth from shock as you saw Thanos pierce Loki in the chest. Your pulse got even louder and you notice that you were having a panic attack. Something that only happens when you were in one of your 'episodes' because of trauma from a young age.

Your tears started to fall as all of the other people in the theater while you all watch Loki, a favorite of the fandom die in the spaceship. You clutched your chest, as you tried to calm yourself. The moment Loki's death scene was over, you were able to catch your breath and focus on watching the entire movie.

"Are you alright? You were crying too much when we got to the Loki part" your friend asked after the movie was over.

You nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine," you said with a fake smile that you were able to pull off perfectly that other people thought you really are.

"Well, I didn't even know that Peter was gonna die! The whole fandom is gonna mourn for this for a few weeks, maybe even months!" your friend said. You thought again about Loki's death which made you immediately sad as you tried hard to fight back the tears. You didn't even know why you were too sad. He was just a fictional character after all.

You got to your home and sat down on the bed, not able to get Loki's death out of your mind. Your tears started to fall again which you let them. You didn't even know why you were sad. He was a fictional character for god's sake! A figment of someone's imagination! Sure, he was your comfort character because you both have the same amount of trauma, but still!

His death wasn't even fair. He got brainwashed. His mother got killed. He finds out that he was adopted and not even Asgardian and then he thought that he was a monster simply because he was from another race and then he had to kill his father and then he was hated everywhere he went! He didn't even have someone! Or a friend! His life was simply unfair and he was clearly misunderstood!

You exhaled angrily as you wipe your tears, wrapping yourself in your thin blanket without even changing out of your clothes. You slowly succumb to sleep as you thought about Loki, extremely saddened about his death.