Chapter 6 - Battle against feelings
REY
She'll be the death of me. When I'm around her, I found it even harder to maintain control. Everything falls into the background. I stand there, letting her touch me.
Suddenly I feel her arms wrapped around my neck into a hug that burns me up inside. Her sweet scent fills every breath, and time gets on pause.
It's been two weeks now since we meet in that clearing. All-day I wait until the sun sets and I take the patrol with Luke.
Then we split, he gets the north part of the forest while I take the south, leading to the clearing. We spent together each night, just sitting side by side, her body leaning on mine, hugging me close.
She told me everything about her. Though I cannot answer her. Not in this form. The only thing I can do is to rub my muzzle on the side of her neck. It seems to calm her down.
She's devastated by her aunt's loss. I get myself wishing to do more to help her. It breaks my heart to see my mate like this.
This is madness. I'm sabotaging myself. I shouldn't be here with her. I should reject her before it's too late.
They will not accept a human for Luna, there never was such a mate in our pack. I've checked all the records again and again, in hope that some solution might be found.
All I found was nothing. There was information that other packs were having mates that were not wolves, yet this uniqueness was a secret pride of our pack, created by the elders.
I was not a supporter of that and tried to convince the younger generation that such things are superstitions, but most of them will still feel disappointed. As the Alpha, I'm bound by this stupid tradition.
Every time we meet, I want to transform into my human form and take her into my arms, shove away all her fears and sorrow.
I want to show her how deeply I care for her. To reject her it's not easy either, it may drive me crazy or feral, not being with her.
After two weeks, she's freer with me. I cannot satisfy the need to look at those beautiful dark brown eyes of hers. They glisten under the moonlight like dark crystals.
Her voice is mesmerizing. I hang on to every word she says. Each morning, when the first rays of sun fly over the forest, it's time to say goodbye.
I walk with her up to the forest's entrance, then I slightly bow my head to her and turn back.
Luke finds me halfway.
"You know this is dangerous." He says as we stop a few metres away from the house, to change back to our human forms and put our clothes on. "Your absence could leave a space for the vampires to enter our territory. You must be alert."
He's right. My reckless behaviour recently could jeopardize our security. If something happens it will be my fault and it's my duty as Alpha to protect them.
"There's not going to happen nothing more between us. We made a promise not to let people find out about us. At least let me enjoy the feeling of having my mate close. I must reject her eventually. We cannot be together."
It's unfair and frustrating. I was just fine before. But now that I found out how finding your mate feels, it's so unfair we can't be together.
Even if I find another female from the pack, she will never make me feel like she does.
Julia still waits for me in the living room, wearing a pair of shorts and a crop-top, revealing her elegant curves. She's with another she-wolf there.
When we enter, the other girl nods at us and leaves while Julia shoots me a playful smile.
"You're tensed." She whispers as she comes closer, her hands caressing my shoulder blades.
"I'm fine." I cut her off, making move to walk away towards the staircase.
"You still resist me." she laughs. "Sooner or later, you'll be mine." She adds as I begin heading up the stairs.
VINCENT
For two weeks now, I play in my mind numerous ways of killing Eve. After Maxine's aunt's death, she went and gave her off for two weeks, so I have to work. How pathetic.
Vektra and Zack tried to make fun of me, but a death look I shot them, and they'll never think of doing it again.
I wait for Maxine to appear as two weeks have already gone and today, she's supposed to get back. I arrive at the warehouse, and take my usual place at the desk, resting my legs on a pile of carton boxes.
The rattling sound of the big iron door is a good sign. She's here, I can feel it. She looks a mess. Her face is paler than usual, and dark circles are already occupying the skin underneath her eyes.
I try to look at myself as a bit compassionate about her suffering. However, I could smell something else as well from the moment she stepped in, but I can't conclude it.
"I'm sorry for your loss." I say as she comes closer to our desk, looking at me. It's so hard to hide my joy. I want to scream in front of her that I was the one who killed that bitch.
And if my plan goes as I hope it would be, soon she'll be transformed and go out in the world and into my castle.
"Thanks." She replies with a faint tone in her voice. She puts her bag onto the desk and starts working.
Then it hits me. Rage and disgust blur my thoughts. Werewolf. Every time these bastards are meddling in my things. I have to move faster.
"You know, if there's anything you need help with, don't hesitate to ask." I say to her, while we open some new orders came in and place the books in large trolleys to carry them later to the bookshop.
"I'm fine, thanks." Is all she says.
"I know that it may sound crazy to you, but I know how you feel." I say in hope that I might trigger her curiosity.
"Really?" she finally responds after a few awfully silent moments. I thought she'll never ask.
"Yes. At the age of seven, my parents decided that they cannot raise me, and I keep them behind from living the luxurious life they'd always dreamed of, so they handed me over to my grandfather. They left and I never saw them again." I say without looking at her. "When my grandfather died, I lost the ground under my feet."
Her look at me says that she took the lie. I'm so convincing.
"And how you got over his loss?" she says with a hesitant voice.
"I said to myself I'm not going to rot, hidden inside four walls. He raised me so one day I get out there, see the world, live some adventures until my heart is full of life."
I look up to face her. Her face is troubled, maybe she's considering what I've just said. After a few moments, she turns to look at me and a faint smile rest on her lips.
"I think you're right."