I’d Rather Get My Paycheck Than Conquer The World.

"So, Mr. Wayne. It has come to my attention that your performance is the lowest out of every other henchman? Is this correct?" Tom asked the middle-aged man sitting in the chair in front of his desk.

"Ah, yes..." Thomas didn't make eye contact, his posture was hunched over, and he didn't seem suitable for this line of work.

"Well, you have two options, Mr. Wayne, but before I tell you those options, let me ask you a question. Do you truly want to be in the villain business? Is this job out of necessity or a dream?" Tom took a drink of a pink soda can.

"Necessity... The pay and benefits are too good for me to pass on with my resume. I didn't go to college, had children at a young age, and I don't have any notable talents for any particular field. If I could choose a job that didn't have to do with crime, hurting people, and the like I'd love to do that instead, but I can't find anything good enough to provide for my family." Thomas shared his background.

"What part of this business specifically goes against your morals, Thomas? What do you refuse to do as a henchman? Killing? Stealing? Hurting? Threatening? Fighting?"

"Well, all of it, I'd say. I was never really the kind of person to wrong someone else. Even when I was younger, I expected to be in a situation similar to yours. Working in an office as a white-collar worker going on a 9-5 5 days a week." The sound of Tom marking something on a piece of paper filled the room.

"I see..." Tom took another sip of his bubblegum-flavored soda. "Like I said before, you have two choices. Either we fire you for your lacking performance or you can undergo a new program for the Personnel Division." Tom didn't mince his words.

"What does the program entail?" Thomas had to feed his family! He couldn't lose this job just because he was too morally righteous!

"It's a retraining of sorts. You will be taken under as a mentee while a mentor trains you to be the perfect henchman you can be."

"That sounds great? Why aren't you guys offering this to everyone who wants it?"

"Well, the training varies depending on the mentor you get. Some mentors are more likely to viciously maim and horrifically injure their students during training. Of course, none of that has happened yet because the program has just been implemented and I'm the only mentor available so far."

"Are you going to viciously maim and horrifically injure me?" Thomas's voice shook.

"That depends on you, Mr. Wayne. Do you simply want to improve your performance score or do you want to rise up in the company?" Tom finished his soda can and tossed it into the air.

Thomas watched as a strange split in space appeared and swallowed the can before disappearing just as soon. Tom then reached his hand into a similar dimensional slice and grabbed another soda. This soda was lime-green in color. He popped open the top and took a sip as he awaited Thomas's response.

"I'd like to rise, sir. The pay right now is good, but I heard about some of the figures that the higher-ups receive, and I'd like that for my family."

"Then you might need to prepare yourself spiritually, physically, and mentally. Of course, you need to sign this contract first." Tom reached inside his desk and flopped down a thick packet of papers stapled together.

"This is kind of like signing a deal with the devil, isn't it?" Thomas nervously laughed.

"..." Tom only sipped his carbonated drink in silence.

"Alright, what do I need to do?" Thomas signed the contract.

"First drink this, then meet me at the Training Center tomorrow at 7 in the morning." Tom grabbed a golden soda can from out of nowhere and placed it down in front of Thomas.

"This isn't going to-"

"Drink all of it and then get out of my office." Tom interrupted him.

Thomas felt a shiver in his bones at Tom's tone and reluctantly did as he commanded. It turns out the head of the personnel division isn't to be underestimated... Thomas grabbed the ice-cold beverage and slowly brought it to his lips. Then he took a tiny tiny sip.

Thoughts of Thomas's family filled his heart after taking that sip. It reminded him of why he was here and what he was doing. He drank more of it. Resolution and courage began to fill up inside of him. Before he knew it, Thomas drank the entire can and then loudly belched. The smell tickled his nose and smelled like paying for his son and daughter's college fund with his own money earned from work.

"Out." Tom reminded him.

"Yes, sir! See you tomorrow." Thomas's tired old body felt nothing like it usually did. He left the Division Head's office and went straight home in higher spirits than he left it.

The next morning, Thomas appeared at 7 A.M. sharp inside the Training Center. All sorts of characters visited the Training Center in the morning to keep up their figure. Staying in the company without taking care of yourself was a surefire way to get fired, injured, or killed on the job. Dealing with heroes, police officers, and sometimes courageous hostages, anything could happen out there. Keeping in shape was one way to prevent the worst from happening to you. At least, that's what the company tells all of its associates.

"Glad to see you could make it, Mr. Wayne." Tom reserved a personal room for them.

"My only other option was to lose the job, so..."

"Do you know any self-defense, Thomas?"

"I do not."

"Well, you are going to learn how to fight."

"Like martial arts?"

"In a way, I suppose." Tom didn't deny it. "Drink this and we'll get started." Tom threw him a bright-blue colored soda can.

"Is this-"

"Drink it." Tom interrupted him and waited.

"Yes, sir..." With some nice fear from his mentor, Thomas downed the sweet-tasting blueberry drink.

"Mr. Hall, please come in." At Tom's request, a 6'5 black beast of a man entered their training room.

He maniacally grinned at Thomas while cracking his knuckles. Suddenly Thomas felt a lot more fear enter his soul as he thought about quitting this job immediately. Whatever his mentor had in store couldn't be worth getting involved with this man.

"Mr. Wayne here needs to learn to fight. I hired you to show him everything that would help him in a life-or-death fight." Tom explained.

"So, you just want me to practice some moves on him or with him?" Hamil scratched his bald head.

"Treat Mr. Wayne as your opponent on the street. No rules, no referee, and no ring. He's coming after your life and you're willing to do everything it takes to stay alive."

"..." Hamil looked at the twig he was supposed to fight. "I'm not interested in getting a lawsuit." Hamil firmly declined.

"Don't worry about any incidents happening. Mr. Thomas here has signed a contract that has waived any legal rights for himself during the course of the Mentorship Program. Any injuries barring death can be dealt with. So, feel free to show him everything and do not hold back, otherwise this would be pointless."

"Dude, did you really sign away your rights?" Hamil looked at Thomas as if he was looking at a retard.

"I didn't know... I just..."

"Whatever man. I'm still getting paid, right?" Hamil asked.

"That's correct. If you do a well enough job here with Mr. Wayne, our company might be willing to hire you again in the future for other employees."

"So, I have my way with this guy and potentially other guys in the future and you're going to pay me for it?"

"Your skills are valuable and able to be bought. Why wouldn't we use you, Mr. Hall?"

"Makes sense to me. Alright man, sorry about this. Next time, read your contracts carefully in the future. I got a family to spoil and these guys are paying me big big bucks for this teaching jig." Hamil neared Thomas like a well-trained predator.

"Wait! I want to-" Hamil charged forward and performed a well-executed tackle, taking Thomas to the ground.

With the wind knocked out of him, Thomas had a hard time figuring out where he was and what was going on. Then something impacted against his face. He blinked as he tried to figure out what happened only for it to happen again and again. It turns out Hamil was pummeling his face in, and it was only by the 3rd punch that Thomas finally reacted.

Thomas tried putting his guard up to protect his face and this only gave Hamil free reign to lay waste to his sides. The middle-aged man cried out in pain and did whatever he could to resist and stop the pain, but Hamil wasn't a world champion for nothing. The untrained worker could only be beaten and abused half to death under his skills.

"That's good enough. Have him drink this and then continue going through every move you know." Tom tossed a glowing light-pink soda can near them.

Hamil fed the unconscious Thomas the drink and watched in amazement and shock as all his wounds rapidly healed.

"Well, wake him up and get started. We aren't paying you for nothing, Mr. Hall." Tom shook him out of his stupor.

"Uh, Right!" Hamil slapped Thomas awake who screamed at the sight of Hamil still on top of him.

"We're only 5 minutes into training. Today might be long..." Tom sighed as he took out several more soda cans.