CHAPTER 52

"We heard baby, it took a bit but we heard okay. We're really confused right now and we need your help with this so we can understand," Imelda says with a calm that isn't like her.

"You all fucked me, and not in the way that I would normally like to be fucked," my words hit with full force as even Imelda backs down a little," I have done some stupid shit and on more than one occasion I have blown a little thing way out of proportion but every time I did that with anyone of you I was right there eating my own shit and just praying that you would forgive me for it. Now do you understand why I'm pissed?"

"Guy we're trying to but you need to calm down and just hear us out for a minute okay," Imelda says again trying to placate me.

"You know what, listen or get out," my words send a shockwave through the room," Not one of you even fucking bothered to listen to what I had to say did you. I love you girls but you really just think of me like a bodyguard with a penis most days."

"Guy we get that you're pissed but please try to calm down so we can understand what happened," Matty says pleading to me.

"It's not what happened it's what you did," I say finally getting them all to stop and think," Maybe for one of the rare points in this relationship I'm not the one who jumped the fucking gun and needs to apologize."

"Guy you said you made a plan to get out of high school and go to college early, some of us didn't like that and we went to talk about it," Rachael says trying to go over their side.

"Yes, you went to talk about it," I say gesturing to all the girls," You stepped outside and I was sitting there for twenty minutes before I paid the check for the meal we didn't have and then came to find out that you all left me there. No words just 'fuck you Guy we're leaving till we get our way'."

"Guy it wasn't like that," Katy says quietly.

"Bullshit, you heard what you didn't like and you banded together you left. That is the one thing you five aren't bothering to notice," I say so angry I have tears," You left me. I was alone and didn't know what to do. I was finally trying to figure out what to do for our future and when I talk about it to you all I get is anger and abandonment."

There isn't a dry eye in the room and while I am hurting all five girls feel like shit. All I did was try to make a plan for our future, a future I still want but now will never get because they will leave me. Matty stands up and I can see she's ready to cry when I get pulled into a hug, she's crying and I feel her hard body go soft as she starts to break down, I can feel the rest closing in and while I have tears they're all crying like I did just break up with them. I'd never want that, I took a lot of pain and suffering, made some horrible decisions and have done worse things just to get one of them to smile. It's an odd moment when Imelda starts to separate everyone and picks up my bag while Kori takes my hand and I get led back to our bedroom. The rest of the house is like crickets, noise until we get too close before I get inside with my girls and all of us start stripping down. I'm not even remotely close to wanting any sex but my mind is put at ease as we get pulled into bed and I hear a list of apologies from all directions. Emotionally we're all exhausted but I squeeze each and every one of my girls as we just lay there in the bed and make sure that above all else we can agree on the same thing, we're okay.

The next day is spent in recovery and group therapy, recovery is mostly me and the girls talking and trying to patch ourselves up while going over what I said and how they felt. It might have been a big misunderstanding on their part; it's agreed that walking away was not something to be repeated. The logic behind my drinking for the first time wasn't really discussed until Katy said that of all the times she's dealt with drunken men this was the first time she thought she might need a translator. We laughed at that and we should because we needed to laugh at something. Group therapy was an hour of time where Ben was out with Bethany and Abigail. I have my whole crew seated in the TV room so that I can explain how I want Ben handled.

"I know we're all a bit tense after 'someone' decided to make an ass out of himself so I will just say that if he feels ashamed he should leave right now and go collect himself," I tell everyone with confusion.

"Guys, aren't you talking about yourself," Jun asks, confused.

"No, I'm talking about you. You sat there and recorded my drunk ass during a personal moment with my girls and I swear if I find it on the internet I'm gonna do something she'll regret," I say laughing and pointing at Lilly.

Everyone gets the joke thankfully and we laugh about it hard before settling down and I officially call my 'family' to order.

"I need to talk to everyone about something that we're all divided on, Ben," I say, getting a level of serious quiet in the room," We all know that Ben is having sex and that there hasn't been a lot of defined answers about the whys and why nots."

"I say we should call Liz and see about getting her down here," Masha says, getting a nod from most of the group.

"And that's good but I want everyone to consider something, would I let my sister be hurt by this or allow a secret like this to be held over her," I ask getting a bit of realization from my people," Ben asked me in 'guy code' to keep it secret and make sure nobody ratted him out. Elizabeth is my sister however and I don't care what code there is. I protect my family, even from itself."

I explain with very few details about what has been going on even letting Hanna know that she was never in any fear of reprisal for being the first. I can see some of my friends and a couple of my girls still want to take care of Ben but I put the idea down with a single thought.

"Ben is one of us, good or bad he's always been loyal even when he failed. Now other than that vengeance isn't ours to give, that belongs to one person and she says she'll handle it," I tell everyone watching their faces go from serious to shocked," She is my sister and from this point forward if you can't sit by and watch him dig his own grave then you need to step away and let him do what he wants."