Hidan

(AN: since itachi never joined akatsuki the information the leaf has in them is basically none. Just that they're a mercenary organization made up of missing nin.)

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As we looked at the two members of akatsuki get up tsunade stepped forward and off of the roof we were on. Dropping down she landed with a

*booommmm*

Cracking the floor beneath her as we landed behind her silently. After staring them down for a few seconds she finally spoke "missing nin leave the land of fire or die." She said bluntly.

"Oh and why would we do that you blind bimbo." Came hidans crazed voice.

"Shut it idiot that's the hokage." Said the other. "We can't do that tsunade of the sannin you know when you became a hokage your bounty went way up." As he finished hidan disappeared with a burst of speed reappearing in front of me.

As his scythe pierced me he let out a mad cackle but the other narrowed his eyes after seeing no one move to help me. "Hidan something's wrong." He warned but it went unheeded.

My body faded out of existence as hidan stopped laughing and looked surprised before

*booommmm*

*crash*

I appeared behind him while stabbing a kunai in his spine and kicking him away. Seeing hidan crash threw trees, I looked at the hokage and dog and getting a nod me, crow, and weasel went after him.

"We know he's somehow immortal and can use some weird blood curse jutsu. Anything else?" I asked

"Nope." Came crows reply

"None." Came weasels answer

Just missing I asked "plan?"

"Me and crow will keep him occupied and test out his immortality you watch and set up traps accordingly." Weasel replied.

Nodding i disappeared into the trees as they closed in on the cursing hidan. "What the fuck was that you shit fuckers. I'll sacrifice all of you to jashin-sama."

Watching as he stood and ran at crow and weasel with wild swings I noticed that he definitely wasn't a S-class nin. 'Hmm he's a average jonin in speed and power I bet it was his immortality that got him to S-ranked status.' I thought as I watched his performance. As he turned around and I got a look at his back my eyes widened 'my kunai is still in his spine how can he move that cut his spinal cord and destroyed two of his thoracic bones.' I thought furiously as I watched him move as if the kunai wasn't even there.

Than I watched as crow cut off one of his arms. After cursing a bit I watched as he picked up his arm and just reattached it. Weasel seeing this cut off his head only for the body to pick up the head and reattach it. "I'm immortal dumbasses jashin-sama has graced me with his greatness now let me bath in your blood." He yelled before his skin turned black with white stripes and his chakra levels skyrocketed.

'Shit what is this I don't know how they beat him in the anime I only know the basic plot because of some fanfics I never had the time to watch all those episodes.' I thought as I created clones and had them at the ready for body substitution. I watched as he now was faster than my perception speed as i immediately used some of kurami's chakra and sent it to my body and eyes. Turning my blood red eyes into slitted blood red ones. Finally catching hidan I saw him now on par with crow as weasel intercepted strikes that would draw blood but not interfere if otherwise. Watching his movements and seeing how most wounds were immediately being healed I thought.

'The only way to beat him would be to separate his badly into limbs and seal them away.' Than leaving a few more clones I went off a bit and set up kill wire and a pit fall.

After five minutes I sent a clone back and had it catch weasels eye. It used anbu hand signs to say 'traps set 500 feet south.'

Nodding he signed 'wait and be ready to activate it.

Nodding my clone popped it's self and sent the message back to me. Getting the message I pulled out six storage sealing scrolls and got ready to use them. As I waited I heard a huge explosion and saw a sea of flames come over the village. 'Shit I know dog and the hokage can hold their own and destroy most S-ranked nin but lion is at a similar level to me and we don't stand a chance against even the weakest S-ranked nin.'

Hearing blades clash I focused back on my task at hand and watched as crow and weasel traded blows with hidan. Getting ready to pull the kill wire I squatted in a tree. But then it happened hidan who has stuck to kenjutsu with his scythe this hole time used a jutsu. As he did a hand sign his mouth opened and let out a torrent of flames. Catching both crow and weasel of guard weasel was able to get out of the way but crow was burnt pretty bad. 'How didn't they see that coming their sharingan should be able to see the fire chakra gather in his stomach.' I thought as I saw hidan about to stab crow while weasel was in a bad position and couldn't get to crow in time. Knowing that I didn't have any clones left i disappeared in a body flicker and placed myself in front of crow as I didn't have any time to put up a defense.

Coughing up blood as his scythe pierced my lung I did a hand sign and used a wind jutsu to blow him away. Finally regaining his bearings crow looked at me and yelled "FOX!" Before picking me up and dragging me away. "Shit shit I'm sorry are you ok." He asked as I got up on wobbly legs.

"Ya I'm fine it's ju…." I started only to be cut off by hidan.

"Hahahhahahhaha finally I have your blood." Came his crazed laughter as a pentagon appeared on the floor beneath him. At his grin I tried to yell only for blood to get stuck in my throat making me cough. "Now suffer." As he finished he swallowed a drop of blood. Than he grabbed my kunai and dragged it down the left side of his face and gouging out his left eye.

As he did this I get something I haven't for the longest time. PAIN.

"Ahahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahaha" letting out a scream my hand flew to my mask as blood gushed out of the eye hole and down the side of my mask. "Get him off the pentagram!" I yelled as I coughed out more blood and held in another scream.

Heading my words weasel kicked him off the pentagram and into a tree. making me fly into a tree as well. Seeing this crow finally realized what hidans jutsu did. "Weasel don't let him get your blood if he does he can use that jutsu to transfer damage over to the person he drank blood from."

Nodding weasel shot after the now normal looking hidan. Seeing this weasel decided to not take any more chances as he cut hidan into pieces as hidans head, right leg, left leg, right arm, left leg, and his hole torso split and fell apart. But hidans screams and curses could still be heard.

Feeling myself about to pass out I pulled the storage scrolls out and handed them to crow not able to speak through my coughing. Getting the message crow threw the scrolls towards weasel as my one remaining eye closed and I passed out. The final thing I heard was

*ding*

[pain tolerance level 8 has leveled up to pain tolerance level 9]

'Well shit.' Was my last thought before everything faded.