Regrets and Pride

Seems like Renly and Petyr aren't supposed to be part of the small council yet. One is too young and the other has not enough influence. It won't be mentioned in the fanfic. So you can just imagine what you want.

———

The next day

I slowly open my eyes before growling because of my itching body.

As I see myself in a bedroom that I don't recognize, I watch my surroundings with visible confusion. Where am I ? Whose bed is even that ?

When my eyes lend on the sleeping woman next to me, I jump in surprise and feel a pain in my back.

''Owwww… My back, my back.''

Wait.

''Why does my back even hurt ? God…''

And I recall the few flashes, helping me put all the pieces together. So I slept with Melara Brax. Why did I even do that ? Where can this be a good idea ?

F*ck, I can't ever let myself be drunk to such a state. What's gotten into my f*cking head !

And it had to be a noble lady of my lands. What if she get pregnant ? What if she wants to marry me and end up denied ? Would she turn into the second coming of lady Ellyn Reyne ?

God, I don't want to live my own Rains because of a woman. I'll be doomed, along with her, my reputation and our houses. GOD D*MNIT !

''I can't let that happen…''

And so I jump out of the bed and exit the bedroom as soon as possible before taking my way to my room in a hurry.

I close my door behind me and jump in my own bed like nothing happened. Maybe she was also drunk and won't remember, right ? Yeah, that could be a possibility.

But I feel a pinch in my heart. What if she get pregnant and doesn't have anyone to claim the kid ? It would be a disaster for her, wouldn't it ? And maybe her father would try to avenge her honor and virtue.

As my thought are running wildly, I heard a knock on my door.

*Knock* *Knock*

I open the door and I'm met with lady Melara herself.

''…Hi my lady, what can I do for you ?''

I decide to play the clueless innocent, for what it's worth. I'm tensed and straight like damn tree.

''Hi Leonard… It was good yesterday. I really loved it. And no need to stress so much, I wasn't that drunk. It wasn't my first time using Moon tea either.''

Moon tea ? THANK THE GLORIOUS SEVEN BASTARDS AND PRAISE THE MOTHER.

''Of course, my lady. It's just that I was drunk to the point of doubting of quite a few things. I apologie for my conduct.''

''I could see that, Leo. I knew what I was doing and it was a really good time none the less. Actually, before the tourney, we could hang out in the city. I know a few entertaining places.''

''Hum my lady, far from me the intention to offense you. But as wonderful as it was, it stays a big mistake. We have wronged our houses and the teachings of the faith by our conduct. We better not be seen together in the future and certainly not here. Walls have ears in Kings Landing.''

''Leonard, you worry yourself too much. What could even happen ?''

A lot of things could happen if we don't stop now.

''You never know what can occur when Tywin Lannister is involved, to which lenghts he can go for the sake of retribution.''

I recall about Tysha, from the show. You don't want to be turned into a broken wh*re, girl.

''I know it very well, Leo. No need to take me for a stupid girl. But I'm not the type to make problems, I wouldn't hate you for rejecting me. We could at least try to make things work between us ?''

''And I'm grateful for that, I really am. But no, I'm afraid that it must take an end before becoming a bigger problem. And this ending may as well be now.''

She ends up understanding the lenght to which this situation could potentially go and retreat to her chambers.

Wasn't it just a one night stand ? Why does she even want to prolong this ? Why here and now ? The worst is that she understands the situation. Damnit all… I'm not an expert in relationships.

I put my back against the door and slide down on it, until I'm sitting on the cold floor. After a few minutes of silence, I put my hands on my head.

''I hate myself, sometimes…''

But being a coward won't solve anything, I better take everything head on and assume the consequences. At least, no baby means no bastard.

I then recalled about Vincent.

''I let Vincent alone in the end of the feast. I have to check on him.''

I run to his room's door and see it partially open, with ruffled clothes on the ground.

''Did something happen to him ?''

I enter discretly and my mouth opens widely. Wtf Vincent… the dude is surrounded by naked maids, snorting loudly without a care in the world.

''Oh well, he could use some more rest.''

I exit the room and make sure to close the door entirely, for him to not have any other visitor.

The day passes like all the others, until the evening. A Red cloak marches to my position to deliver me a message from my father.

''Young lord, your lord father orders you to go to his private quarters immediately. He is quite vehement that you should hurry there the earliest possible.''

A bright red flag appears in my head. This is not anything good. The time has come for me to face him. Of course, it would happen.

I make my way to him and I'm met with a STERN Tywin Lannister, colder and sharper than usually.

''Do you know why I made you come here ?''

''Yes, father. I went overboard yesterday and made some mistakes.''

''SOME MISTAKES ?… You acted like a drunkard in the very room of the festivities. You danced like a brainless peasant with your stupid friend. You let this disgusting degenerate piss on lord Serrett's cousin. The spiteful moron nearly killed himself, but unfortunately failed to do so. AND YOU SLEPT WITH A NOBLE LADY OF OUR LANDS.''

''…''

What can I even say to that ? Yes, I did.

''At least, she was smart enough not to get pregnant. Don't you get the problem ? You are a TWELVE NAMES DAY UNBETROTHED HEIR TO THE GREATEST KINGDOM OF WESTEROS. AND YOU MUST ACT AS SUCH ! You have been a DISGRACE to our house.''

I feel incredibly awkward. What he says is true and I have nothing to defend myself. I really have failed him, this time.

''…''

''If I didn't turn her into a wh*re, it's because she already is one. In the past, she acted like a common wh*re and lord Brax discovered it. He knows how to punish her, from what I heard. It does however NOT excuse your actions. You acted like a FOOL.''

''…''

''You will be punished in the measure of your stupidity. You are not allowed to see Melara Brax ever again, nor to send her letters or anything else related to her. You won't be touching a glass of any type of alcohol in the foreseeable future. Vincent Kenning will be sent back to Kayce tomorrow, hopefully to rot there. And your work as an heir is going to be tenfold what it was supposed to be, when we go back to Casterly Rock. For this time, it will be enough with that much. BUT… Don't disappoint me EVER again. Do I make myself clear ?''

Damn, it's a lot. But it could have been far worse, like Melara and Vincent dying in a ditch. Or the girl being f*cked by the entirety of the fifty thousands soldiers of the Westerlands.

''I understand, father. I will do as you command and promise to not repeat my mistakes in the future.''

''Good. Now, get out. And remember this, Lannisters. Don't. Act. Like. Fools.''

I exit his quarters and go back to my room. The next day, I had to bid my farewell to Vincent. I hope to see him again, some day.

As for Melara, I can't approach her. I don't even know what her punishment is going to be. But I hope that things will work out for her.

But it's time to think about other things than the mistakes of yesterday.

Now, I have to show some pride and honor to Westeros. The tourney is going to start in a few days. I must train harder and harsher than ever before, to show what I'm capable of.

And so I trained with the sword and with the bow like a madman, pushing my very limits and bleeding from my efforts.

From dawn to dusk, I trained with little rest. To be the best, I must know everything about my weapons. I have to use them as I would use my limbs themselves.

Sweat and blood are accumulating on my body with the passing days. But never did I gain the slightest scare, as the accelerated healing was too effective for those.

I worked my muscles with the training of modern bodybuilders, with enhanced effect on all my body parts.

I sharpened my senses to be able to listen more closely to my danger sense and exploit it to the fullest during my fights. I wanted to become a true beast, an unbeatable knight of the seven kingdoms.

There was ONLY training, until the first day of the tourney arrived.

I make my way along with Jaime for the jousting competition. He may be an incredible swordsman, but my brother is also talented in the joust. Of course, he isn't as good than with his sword.

The entire morning and part of the afternoon was consecrated to this part of the tourney.

In the semi finals, Jaime went against ser Barristan Selmy, the current lord commander of the Kingsguard.

Jaime failed but Barristan was injured in the process. It wasn't my brother's intention, but you never know what can happen in a joust.

In the finals, ser Barristan decided to continue despite his injuries and managed to beat lord Eddard Stark. Until today, I didn't know that these men were so good in the joust.

But he resigned his place for the melee as he had to heal his injuries. And he doesn't have any accelerated healing, so it's bound to take some time.

I congratulated my brother for his efforts. He may have lost, but he lost to a living legend still in his prime. Barristan Selmy wounded THE Robert Baratheon at the trident, we aren't talking about a lowly knight here.

The next day arrived and the first part of the archery competition took place. It was a selection phase where only the ten best archers would be selected for the finals.

There were the twenty-five, fifty and seventy-five meters marks for this first part. I aced it, as a lot of the competitors weren't that great.

Now today, I'm having my finals of archery and the nine others aren't bad at all.

I don't know everyone, but half of them are from the Riverlands. We are two from the Westerlands, there are two guys from the Vale and the last one is from the North.

The one I know the most about between them is quite a character, ser Brynden Tully, with his nickname of the 'Blackfish'.

In 260 AC, the guy fought in the war of the Ninepenny Kings against the Band of Nine, on the Stepstones. This is how Westeros came to discover his talents. He gained a lot of fame and proved himself to be a great knight. Brynden is no joke as an archer.

I stress a bit to face such a legend. But it's going to start in a few minutes, now. So I need to be calm. As Bruce Lee said, I must be water.

As the signal is given, I take a deep breath and I aim with the best of my ability. This is a series of a hundred meters mark targets, so it's an entire different level.

I release my arrow and it makes a thundering sound while tearing the air in its way. It ends right on the middle of the round target.

But I wasn't the only one, as Brynden, Holster and two others also made bullseyes.

The series continued until the tenth and final shot. And I'm stressed, as the target has been moved an additional twenty-five meters away from its original position.

The other problem is that I've the same score as the Blackfish, right now. We both previously made seven bullseyes.

As I prepare myself to aim with this last arrow, I stop listening to any sound and I close my eyes.

I'm aligned with the target. All my senses are focused on my arms, my arrow and the bow. Everything becomes a line to guide my arrow to the center of the target.

After praying to the seven under my breath, I let my arrow do the rest and slowly open my eyes.

''YES !''

It's my eighth perfect shot of the finals, leading me to my victory.

But it also depends on the results of the Blackfish. I look on my left and Brynden's arrow arrived a few millimeters away from the center. That was close…

And like that, I won the competition of archery at twelve names day. Brynden was second, lord Gulian Swann third and lord Holster Tully fourth. The others had lame results.

I see the Blackfish coming towards me calmly, while cracking a small smile.

''Good job, ser Leonard. You are young, but you are a damn fine archer. Such a pity that you weren't born in the Riverlands…''

Hum, no it's not. I'm thankful to not be a Tully, thank you very much. It's barely better than being born in the Iron Isles.

''Thank you, ser Brynden. You were an incredible opponent, today. And this last shot was so tensed… I won't ever forget this day.''

''Ah! An archer to the very heart, I see. You really should have been a Tully, I tell you.''

We continued to talk like that a little before the man nods at me and goes to see his brother.

From afar, I could see brotherly pride in my Jaime's eyes. But it wasn't only directed to me. Perhaps, Jaime has some respect for ser Brynden. Now that I think about it, he had to go to Riverrun quite a few times in his younger years.

That was intense, but it isn't over yet. Two days later, the melee will take place. This is going to be the true challenge for me.

But I'm glad. I regained a bit of my lost pride and I've shown what I'm made of to the seven kingdoms. My last obstacle for this tourney is going to be my own brother.

It's time to see if my training is bearing some fruits.

———

P.S: The story of Melara isn't over.