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please reset the booktitle BronzeBronzeman 20231218092329 22

Shunned by society for having too many dicks, I hid away my schlongy shame. But when dungeons began to rise, flooding the earth with thick streams of monsters, humans began to awaken, and my curse became my strength. With my double dick system I get twice the stats, and twice the skills that a normal one dicked person would get. Seems like a weird way to build a system, but I'm not complaining.

BronzeBronzeman · Fantasy
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10 Chs

The Giant Trouser Snake

I make my way down another street, burning every monster in sight. This time I try to avoid burning the buildings too.

The killing is mostly uneventful, a few stronger monsters here and there, and a lot of snakes for some reason, but nothing crazy. As I'm thinking about going back down the street to suck up the monsters, the ground begins to shake.

A huge red snake, longer than the train, shoots out of the ground. I just barely jump out of the way in time to avoid it's mouth.

The snake is covered in fiery, smoldering scales. I can feel the heat coming off of this huge python. Or do pythons not have teeth? Anyway, this snake does, two huge fangs. I don't have an antidote skill, so I should probably watch out for the mouth.

I use my one eyed monster ability and check it's stats.

It's called a Giant Burning Trouser Snake. I shoot my ropes of fire at it, I slam my balls right in it's face. They're having little effect, it's health is barely going down, and it's regenerating at nearly the same rate as the damage I'm dealing.

Too bad it won't hold it's mouth open and let me shoot inside. It's head moves too much to accurately hit anyway.

I guess I'm gonna have to stop being cheap. I run forward then jump up and punch it right in the upper body part, by it's neck. I don't know anything about snakes. It doesn't seem fazed, and when I land and look at it's health, it seemed to do less damage than the fire.

Just then I get blindsided, it's tail smashes into me. It's like being hit by a big ass tree, except it's on fire.

I go flying into a building, thankfully the glass window broke the impact a bit before I hit the wall. The hit from the trouser snake hurt, but it also set me on fire. Thankfully my hair was fine, probably on account of my stats, but my clothes were burning.

I was already stopped, and I rolled around on the ground, managing to put out the fire before my boxers completely burned. My pants and my shirt burned off, but I still had my own trouser snakes tucked away.

Standing there, in nothing but my boxers and my shoes, I decided I should take this a bit more seriously.

I ran out, keeping an eye on it's movements and launched some fireballs. The explosions from the fireballs seem to do a bit more damage compared to firestream.

I jumped around on top of buildings, pushing off of walls, darting around to avoid getting hit. As I was doing this, I kept shooting fireballs, trying to aim for the same area on it's body.

The force of impact from each of my balls blowing did most or all of the damage. The fire itself, obviously, is possibly useless against it's burning scales.

I kept shouting "Fireball" as I jumped around, trying to shoot as fast as possible while avoiding it's tail and it's mouth. Then I shot my load before I'd even said the word.

I don't know if it's because of the levels the skill gained while I was fighting, or a combination with stats, but I didn't have to say it to use the skill. I just focused on where I wanted it to go and using the skill, and it'd happen.

I could still only cast it so fast and so often, but now I'm not limited by speech. I kept attacking the same spot as much as I could.

Eventually I managed to make holes in it's body faster than it could regenerate. After a while it focused more on covering it's body with it's tail than hitting me. The city allowed me to jump from one side to another and keep shooting faster than it could move it's lumbering body.

After a while I was getting deeper, I'd gotten past the outer layer and was shooting inside of the snake. It's protection wasn't as great and the damage increased. I was tearing it open more and more as I focused on the wounds.

I was getting exhausted from all the movement, avoiding it's attacks and getting around it's defenses. Even with my doubled stamina, I couldn't keep doing this forever.

My mana was getting low, but so was it's health. I had to keep going, I don't have any weapons and I can't let it regenerate. As I kept shooting, I eventually tore it in half with the final explosions. Just as I could feel my mana pool running out, it was over.

My balls leveled up several times during the fight. I also got several levels for myself after killing the boss. I've been putting most of my points into magic based stats, those being Spirit, Willpower, and Intellect. Next Was Vitality, in case I got hit. Which was good, because the snake took out about an eighth of my health in one hit. Then Dexterity and Stamina for movement, and so I don't get tired.

I only put a few points in strength. Maybe if I'd have put more in strength punching would've worked. On the other hand, if I balanced my stats out too much, maybe nothing would have.

Before I could focus on using my stat points, I saw a skill book fly out of the snake.

I ran over and looked at it. The book said forging, I absorbed it immediately. When I read about the skill in my status window, it said the skill allows you to make things out of various materials, such as the bodies of monsters. The items you could make included weapons and armor. Wow, that's convenient.

I mean really, that's pretty good timing. I just lost my clothes, I realized how badly I need a weapon, and I've got all these materials now. That really is convenient. What are the chances?

I suck up the body of the giant trouser snake, barely fitting it's girth into my holes. As I've been stuffing them, they've gotten bigger as they leveled up, but it just barely fit. Then I took the monsters I'd left down the street. After I filled my hole with the boss and the other monsters I was nearing the maximum capacity even with my double experience rate for this skill, and double capacity.

I guess if I end up wasting a bunch of materials leveling up forging, making shitty armor, it'll be fine. I need to make room anyway. I hate having a full inventory.

I also wonder why I couldn't see resistances on the snake. Do I just need to level it up, or do I need a different skill?

Either way, I should probably focus on making some pants.