Goyya
tbh its not a bad story but there are a couple of things that are annoying af. first you said you want to keep it as close as possible to the original... well you havent. He doesnt perv on underaged girls or is a perv in general. Not to mention you do this every chapter. second is the harem, ik it says it in a tag but honestly you say you can't write romance and then go the harem route? how contradictory is this? one of the main reasons im dropping. I ship him and yoruchi would have been perfect plus cause you said you can't write romance keeping it at just that pair would have worked out great. Lastly another main reason I dropped is cause I dunno if the author is a sub and likes this sht but I dont.... kis getting beaten up each every other block of writing, him getting verbally abused by every girl he meets. You always play it off as the reaosn he 'lets' them do it is because he takes it too far ???? how is then hitting and making fun of him better? tbh I wouldnt rly mind that much if yoru is the only one who does it now and then as thats an equal relationship but then it just so happens every girl he meets does this. Think you have a good idea but ruined it with going harem route like most ideas tbh. would have been better if they where older and in it before canon and have the shop set up and go from there. The way you did it is just a forced way for the harem and then you even force the shop in to keep the idea of the hat and clogs that we like.
This eventually becomes a super predictable generic harem novel and I'm still confused on how, why and when it happened the author had all the signs and work done towards a Great harem story and one day every girl in the harem lost their personalitys and took up the copy and paste "Stare at the mc coldly all the time, enjoying seeing him in trouble or suffering and do absolutely nothing on their own." Even worse Kisuke started falling into the generic Mc role more and more each chapter it also feels like he has made absolutely no progress in anything in atleast a 100 chapters. More More problems appear and we have seen absolutely nothing of the mc preparing for it at all we keep hearing mentions of projects we have never seen come to light or even getting clarified in anyway it feel like they are only said as an excuse for the mc's lack of progress "OH it's cause he is working on so much at once in the background." Is so weak and uninteresting. So as I said on Rebirth in Bleach before I will still read this but this has gone from "Must read as soon as it's out." To "Read it if I have nothing else.".
This story starts out good, but really goes bad as the story progresses. The MC does not grow and becomes increasingly annoying. ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฅ
bit.ly/3LyRF1N ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐
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A nice and fun fan friction . If you are fan of DXD than this is for you. And most important , more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more
Well, this is a league above other DxD fanfics. It has a clear and nice format. allowing you to easily enjoy whatever is written. Some characters seem forcibly dragged around for no clear reason, other than plot device. The amount of spelling errors is practically non-existent within this work, making it a satisfying read.
The story is good at beginning...... Character development during childhood friend is good. Until world hopping arc. No many thing to say,but There was nothing to worth until now. If youre fan of dxd which contain insane power level of enemy, various mythology, politic development, a little titty. Please read other dxd fanfic than this one. But if youre danmachi ones, be rejoice. This is yours.... Too long delving into dungeon when there was not many thing worth/too much filler. Mach chapter contain slice of life. Typical danmachi ff. Thats why a little who read this ff,except fan of danmachi
Its Good at the Start But After 50 Chapters It feels really boring like i have never read the Dxd Novel But Aika with a Sacred Gear and Hollow I skipped Alot of Chapters Because it feels really boring and Did aika just have a hollow and zanpakuto?overall it feels really boring reading it dont get angry