Twinjay
bit.ly/3LyRF1N ππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππππ
the start has so far shown to be absolutely wonderfull, just a reminder since he is aware of haki and its types he should start with getting the basics down, from what is shown in the show observation can be practised with some constantly hitting with eyes blindfolded and ears covered or makig an obstacle course and running blind through it, parkour through a jungle is another way to practise it and rokushki with soru( 10 kicks in the blink of an eye) and geppo ( kick hardenough to hit air) , the rest are kinda up in the air, life return is a body control skill that should allow to learn kami-e first and tekkai and shigan, armament haki is a bit iffy to practise just keep hitting a rock with the belief that it will break( gonna take a huge time period to even activate it) for devil fruit pls let it be the enels rumble rumble fruit ( concept of closest fruit upon death) but this aside this is a beautifull start
i should thank the author about your book, the story development is unique, but before that can you please research a little bit about the one piece timeline, what i know about one piece timeline is, first roger died in 1500 not 1510, so its not 4 year after roger death author, second kuina born in 1502 so she just 8 in 1510, and you're right about it's 12 years before the canon , cause canon start in 1522, so thanks about ur interesting novel, i like it . keep strong πͺπΌ author and keep updating . huehehee [img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend] [img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update]
Hey! How's it going, everyone! Don't mind me, I'm just shamelessly reviewing my own book like any average author would do. I'll try to write this story with the same rating that I gave in this review! If I made any mistakes, please feel free to tell me. Just know there's a difference between critiquing and just straight up bashing me...
Keep going don't drop the story and don't make the character too OP. πππ Also please upload one chapter a day if you can keep the same quality, I'd recommend you save some chapters and upload them everyday it helps in revising and editing the chapter before you upload them giving increased quality and steady uploading.π
this novel got everything I've been looking forπ€.. sorry for the English π . there's no op cheat only hardwork and little bit of plot armour(for df if it's not then don't mind me) and there's no harem tag so it's a plus for meπ.. looking forward to amazing journey of MCβοΈ.. pls don't drop and keep updating π..
Amazing start to a story. A unique take on the one piece world implementing breathing techniques is a refreshing outlook. Writing quality is great, no issues with grammar I could think of from the top of my head .Story began wonderfully. Word background and character design is self explanatory. Updating stability is meh at the moment. as there has been no chapter for about 3 weeks. Overall a great start to an intriguing read.
SO far the story is going reallly well , with the character development and side characters as well. tho with the latest chapter they might need a brief summary in thier skills P.S one piece has an extremly weird power system , wat with skill to make u super human and devil fruits & haki just throwing common sense out the window! u will need to develop a power system to give a bit of relavance to how strong/week the characters are/will be in comparison to others