Mana, Mysteries, and Mayhem: Grand Caster's Revelation

The sudden revelation of Grand Caster Solomon's identity left the occupants of the church stunned and wide-eyed, each processing the information in their own way. 

Tokiomi: The Grand Caster, King Solomon too?! 

Tokiomi yelled in shock. 

Zelretch: Well, well, it seems we have ourselves quite the gathering of legendary figures. Grand Caster Solomon, I trust you will bring your legendary wisdom and power to bear in our time of need. 

Solomon's response was measured yet decisive, as he addressed Zelretch with a hint of respect in his tone. 

Solomon: Zelretch, your insight is as sharp as ever. 

Rider: King Solomon, really? Now that is a truly legendary name.

Rider said. 

Waver: King Solomon, you've got to be kidding me. He's the most powerful mage to of ever lived, how can anyone beat him? 

Waver yelled freaking out. 

Solomon: No matter. I do not wish to harm any of you. In fact, I come with the same objective as you. 

Zelretch: Oh? So you know of the Ultimate Ones, then? 

Solomon: More than that. I have fought them personally. 

Zelretch raised an eyebrow at this while some eyes widened. The Grand Caster simply trudged forward while ignoring all gazes cast toward him. 

He paused, however, to look at a certain pair. Zaegar and Emi simply narrowed their eyes before the former did his usual thing. 

Zaegar: Take a picture, fucker. It lasts longer. 

Solomon: Quite. Let me explain as briefly as possible. I am not from the past, but from a distant future. 

Waver: Future? Wait, but... but, how?! 

Saber: The Throne of Heroes exists outside of time. Heroic Spirits, regardless of their place in chronology, can be summoned to any era. 

Solomon: In such a distant future, the Aristoteles, also known to you as Ultimate Ones, had been brought forth by Gaia in a similar fashion to this situation. 

Tokiomi: Before that, I must ask how is it exactly possible for a Servant to be summoned without a Master.

Solomon: Humanity's summoning system is a very downgraded version of the true Heroic Spirit Summoning set by the World itself. 

Zelretch: For what purpose? 

Solomon: To vanquish entities threatening the planet at large. I shall only tell you this: Seven Heroic Spirits, instead of being summoned to fight one another for human purposes, are summoned to fight together against one powerful enemy. 

Zaegar: Oh, I get it. So everyone here is a knockoff, and you're the real deal. 

Solomon: Yes. Such beings are Grand Servants like myself. 

There was silence after this. The Masters tried to make sense of this situation, and they were joined by the Servants, who shockingly knew nothing of this. 

Meanwhile, Zaegar shot a look at Emi, who simply nodded. Of course, she knew about it. 

Zelretch: Grand Servants... Well, this shocked me to my core, but we must move on. I presume you were summoned precisely for this situation. 

Solomon: Yes. My mission is to slay the Aristoteles, but I recognize I cannot perform such a deed alone. That was my mistake. 

Zelretch: Recognizing you need help against them, even as a Grand Servant. That's pretty terrifying in a sense. Can you tell us more about them?

Solomon nodded in response to Zelretch's question, his expression thoughtful as he considered his next words.

Solomon: I'm afraid my knowledge of the Aristoteles is limited. However, I do know that type Jupiter and type Saturn have been confronted by other Grand Servants, while Venus was slain by another Grand Servant.

Zaegar: Speaking of which, isn't Type-Venus the one closest to this place?

Solomon: Correct. You must make haste. I will have to make preparations for the upcoming battle, so I must depart. I will contact you all when I am prepared.

Zelretch: I see. 

Solomon: Be ready for tomorrow, heroes, for that very title shall be put to the test. 

With that, Solomon simply disappeared into astral form, leaving everyone in silence. Suddenly, the eighth Master stood up.

Emi: Zaegar, we're leaving.

Zaegar: Yeah, it was getting boring anyway.

Zelretch: So soon?

Emi: Didn't you hear? If what he says is true, then Type-Venus will arrive TOMORROW. We do not need to waste any more time in a place like this.

Zaegar: You know, you're all legendary figures, but none of you can brag about saving the whole damn world. Can't wait to do it myself, just so I can rub it in the face of my beloved master, someone who's not even from this world, can be much more important than you, not that I wasn't in the first place.

Emi: (Mental Link) Reverse psychology? Do you honestly think that'd work?

Zaegar: And yes, I WILL rub it in everyone's face, so get ready to hear that one, Goldilocks! Toodles!

He laughed as he placed a hand atop Emi's head and simply... disappeared. Everyone did a double-take, except for Saber and Kiritsugu, since they had experienced it firsthand.

Archer: Tokiomi, we are departing. I do not desire to hear any more nonsense.

Tokiomi: As you wish, my king. If you excuse us.

Archer simply scoffed as he vanished. Tokiomi nodded curtly at Zelretch, who returned the gesture before leaving the church's premises.

Zelretch: ...Well, I assume that your answer remains the same?

Rider: Well, I don't understand this "Grand Servant" thing, but since it happened in the first place, then it sounds deadly serious. What do you say, boy?

Waver: You're asking ME?

Rider: Well, yeah. You ARE the Master after all, right?

Waver: U-Uh, yeah... Well, I really don't know. I can take fighting using the city as a battlefield and all, but fighting off ALIENS that threaten the entire planet? I don't know.

Zelretch: That's perfectly understandable for someone your age. But unfortunately, you will have to make a decision now, young man.

Waver: R-Rider?

Rider: Boy, I don't have any stake in this decision. Just do what you think is best. Will you fight, or will you watch?

The young magus looked conflicted, and no one could truly blame him. He was just a boy who stumbled into something bigger than himself. Bigger than any of them, really.

Waver: Well... W-We've got someone that at least knows what we're dealing with and sides with us, s-so... I may regret this later on, or I may not live to regret it at all, but... Fine, I'll fight with Rider.

Rider boasted a proud grin as he suddenly slapped his Master's back with a hearty laugh.

Rider: Gahahaha! Well said, Master! Well, there you have it, Magician. Count me in!

Zelretch: Excellent. I commend your bravery, Waver. The others?

Sola-Ui: Very well, then. Lancer and I have no objections to this. 

Lancer: Indeed.

Zelretch looked to the silent Magus Killer, who stared back impassively before giving the slightest nod. Zelretch did the same in appreciation.

Zelretch: Very well, then. The night is still young, so I recommend that you go to your bases and relax for the battle to come. You will be contacted by familiars tomorrow. Oh, and if we all make it out of this, you're getting rewarded handsomely, of course. Meeting adjourned!

He clapped his hands good-naturedly as the Masters and Servants exited one by one. Zelretch then looked at the remaining Master.

Zelretch: Well, Mr. Kariya, was it? Did you want to discuss something?

Kariya: Uh... Can we talk in private? And I mean VERY privately.

Zelretch: Hmm. Risei, do you have a spare office that I can use?

Risei: Of course. Follow me.

Scene Break - Zaegar's Residence

As usual, Zaegar burst through the door after casually deactivating the antimatter-fueled defense mechanism. (Emi ordered him to take it off, but it was just too damn awesome to take it off just like that.)

Ophis: *sarcastically* So, now you've got aliens to fight. What fun! Can we do anything actually new?

Fou: Fou, fou!

Zaegar: Yeah, I know, that Solomon guy gave me a weird vibe. You knew about that, Mistress?

Emi: I do. Everything he said was the truth. The world itself summoned him to fight against the Types.

Zaegar: Dope.

Ophis: Since you know how this works, what are we all dealing with?

Emi: Truthfully, only Archer, Grand Caster, and Saber's sword are qualified to deal with it. It's a matter of size. The Types are, at the very least, the size of a city.

Zaegar: Oooooh! Fun!

Fou: Foooou, fou!

Ophis: So Lancer, Rider, Berserker, Assassin, and Caster will just have to be battle commentators or something?

Emi: Maybe. Maybe not. Can I trust you to fight them?

Zaegar: Trust me? If I couldn't handle them, the world wouldn't have sent them my way. You can count on the Best Boi, Mistress.

Emi sighs.

Emi: We'll see about that.

Zaegar: Soooo...What does one gotta do to get that "Grand" title?

Emi: The qualifications for Grand Servant vary between each class. And no, there is no "Grand Foreigner".

Zaegar: But I'm Zaegar, damn it! If anyone deserves the Grand Foreigner title, it's ME!

Emi: I told you, "Being Zaegar" isn't a free pass for your nonsense!

Zaegar: (chuckling) Oh come on, Mistress, where's your sense of humor? Imagine the chaos I could cause with that title. My master would never hear the end of it!

Emi: (rolling her eyes) That's exactly what worries me.

Zaegar: (leaning back, still grinning) Hey, life's too short to take everything so seriously. Besides, you know you secretly enjoy my antics.

Emi: (sighing) Unfortunately, that may be true.

Zaegar: (laughing) See? You're starting to see the fun in it all. Now, about that Grand Foreigner title...

They entered the living room where they saw their guest vampire sipping on some tea. She smiled upon seeing them.

Zaegar: Yo, lame vampire, you get your blood rage in check?

Arcueid: Actually, I saved a life today. What did you do?

Emi: Planning how we're going to save your boring world. Any other achievements you have to add?

Arcueid huffed with a pout, while Zaegar grinned at Emi, causing her to blush slightly. Meanwhile, Ophis was pondering.

Ophis: ...I feel like we're all forgetting something.

Fou: Fou?

Ophis: I dunno. Probably not that.

Zaegar: Who cares? More importantly, where's my damn crossword?

Scene Break - Fuyuki Sewers

Ryuunosuke: This is too horrible! It's just too much! We worked so hard! What kinda monster would do this?!

In the darkness of the sewers of Fuyuki, two figures found their lair destroyed and everything they had worked for reduced to ashes.

The first one was a young, orange-haired man who openly wept at losing everything, twisted as it was.

The second one was a Servant, Caster, who merely looked around. Then, he crouched down and tried to console his Master.

Ryuunosuke: Man, nothing's been going well for us. Grabbing kids suddenly became hard as hell, and I had to use that Command Seal thingie to get you out of trouble... Maybe we had too much fun, so God punished us.

Suddenly, Caster grabbed Ryuunosuke and looked at him with a very serious look.

Caster: I'll tell you this, Ryuunosuke. God never punishes humans! He simply toys with them. I once committed greater atrocities and blasphemies than had ever been done on this Earth. But no matter how much I murdered and defiled, no divine punishment came! The next thing I knew, my quest for evil had been ignored for eight whole years. In the end, it was not God who destroyed me, but the self-interest of humans just like me. What brought an end to my evil deeds wasn't judgment or anything like it. It was simply theft!

Ryuunosuke: But, Mister... God still exists, right?

Caster: You are faithless and have never witnessed a miracle. Why would you think that?

Suddenly, Ryuunosuke stood up with renewed passion. Vile, twisted passion, but passion nonetheless.

Ryuunosuke: Because the world appears to be boring, but you just have to look to find all kinds of crazy stuff! I've always thought about this. A world filled with so many wonderful things could never have come about by chance. Once you decide to enjoy it for real, you'll find no better entertainment in this world! There's got to be an entertainer out there who's writing a saga about five billion people. If you wanted to describe somebody like that, God is the only thing you could call him!

Caster: Then Ryuunosuke, do you think God loves humans?

Ryuunosuke: He's head over heels! He couldn't possibly write the saga of this world continuously and restlessly without love. I'm sure he has loads of fun writing it, enjoying his own work all the while. God loves human virtues like courage and hope, but he loves screams, blood, and despair just as much. If he didn't, there's no way fresh intestines could be so colorful! That's why I'm sure the world is filled with God's love!

Caster: In an era where people no longer believe and the state has abandoned God's will, I had no idea a faith as new and invigorating as yours could result! You have my admiration, Ryuunosuke, my Master! 

The Servant bowed in admiration. Ryuunosuke just scratched the back of his head.

Caster: But wouldn't my blasphemies simply be a farce according to your religious viewpoint?

Ryuunosuke: Nah. It takes the best entertainers to get smiles out of playing the villain, right? If you ask me, I bet God just loves playing along with your antics.

Gilles de Rais: So, you're saying that both blasphemy and praise are forms of worship to you? HAHA! Ryuunosuke! You truly are the bearer of a deep and profound philosophy! 

Ryuunosuke: You really think so?!

Gilles: Precisely! A God who makes puppets of all men for sport and is just another clown himself! I see. Then his vicious ways make sense. Very well. Then we'll have to stain the garden of God with the brilliant colors of despair and terror. We'll have to show the director in heaven that he's not the only one who knows what entertainment is!

Ryuunosuke: Woah! We're gonna do something awesome again, aren't we? Hah! Cool... SO COOL!

Little did they know that a figure watched from the shadows. 

Fortunately for them, a Grand Servant wasn't to interfere in the matter of this Holy Grail War, or they would be dead on the spot.

Timeskip - The Next Morning, Einzbern Castle

When Irisviel woke up to a beautiful sunrise, she would have usually felt joy in seeing such a fascinating sight. 

However, all she felt now was dread.

She and Maiya had heard yesterday's conversation, and she could barely believe it herself even at this point. 

If everything was true, then the world that Kiritsugu fought so hard for and sacrificed everything to save would end today.

She exited a door from a hallway to further appreciate the sight. Her husband was already on the balcony, gazing at the rising sun. He always woke up early.

Irisviel: Kiritsugu?

Kiritsugu: ...This might be the last sunrise we'll ever see.

She nodded wordlessly as she hugged him from behind. The man was doing his best not to break his composure.

Kiritsugu: I... I want to deny all of this, but I can't. I still can't believe that the world might be ending because of a little girl who summoned... whatever he is.

Irisviel: I feel the same way.

Kiritsugu: I couldn't sleep yesterday. I only thought about Illya. It's too late to even return and spend our last moments together.

Irisviel: ...Yes.

Kiritsugu: ...Maybe this was all for nothing. Maybe the world is fated to end after all.

Irisviel: ...I know that I'm not the best at this, and I know I'm the least suited to even lecture you, but still, we can't accept this. I'm the best example of that. I was fated to be an emotionless puppet for the Grail, and yet you saved me and made me see the beauty in life, especially Illya. 

Kiritsugu: I know! But what am I supposed to do against something like this?!

Irisviel: You're not alone. You don't have to do everything yourself. If you don't trust yourself, if you don't trust me, then trust Saber. Your greatest wish is to save the world... but just this once, look at the sunrise, and fight. Fight and give Illya another sunrise like this one.

He fell silent, but Irisviel knew what his answer was. Kiritsugu Emiya wanted to be a hero of justice, sacrificing everything, even himself, to save the world.

Now was the time to prove that resolve.

Scene Break - Fuyuki Church

Kirei Kotomine, although not exactly pleased to see the plan completely derailed, wasn't entirely opposed to this development either.

How odd. The notion of being recruited to save the world itself was beyond his wildest fantasies.

Perhaps if he participated, he would be closer to the answer he sought. Perhaps he would finally find a sense of purpose.

His only inconvenience was working alongside Kiritsugu Emiya and the eighth Master, simply known as Emi.

He could not understand the former's existence. The man had everything, be it material or emotional, and he was... sacrificing it all away. And for what? The Magus Killer was a broken man, just like Kirei himself. 

The latter, however, irked Kirei. Perhaps further than Emiya. The girl didn't even try to hide the fact that she was a hollow being masquerading as a human. But when her Servant was near, she was, for lack of a better word, alive.

She harbored feelings for someone close to her, something that he couldn't have done. Claudia must have been frowning at him from the afterlife at that very moment.

So, this was envy. It was better than feeling nothing.

He remembered Archer's words:

Archer: You have yet to learn what pleasure is. First, you must gaze at the outside world to understand yourself.

If so, he would closely watch these two individuals as he played along with this scheme.

Then again, he wouldn't be able to do so if the world ended on that day, so he would cooperate without complaints.

Scene Break - Later, Mount Enzo

Zaegar: ...Why the fuck did you wake me up early to get here, again?

Fou: Mkyu.

Emi: To begin a discussion, of course.

What remained of Mount Enzo due to Zaegar being... well, Zaegar, was a massive crater that was strangely deserted for something so blatant.

Zaegar: Discussing how should we blow this whole thing up? Don't worry, I got this.

He said this while shouldering a special bazooka with antimatter rockets that he, as usual, pulled out of nowhere.

Emi: Zaegar, no. We're here to talk to someone.

He blinked, still having the bazooka ready to fire. 

Emi: No, we're not using that.

Zaegar pouted and threw the bazooka to wherever he got it out from. Emi still couldn't make sense of this strange power, but that was par for the course with her Servant.

Ophis: Talking with who, again?

Emisimply pointed at the crater. There was a figure overlooking the depths of the destroyed mountain, apparently inspecting something.

Zaegar: Oh, look who it is. OI, GRAND DUDE, WHATCHA UP TO?!

Emi resisted the urge to facepalm as the Grand Caster did not react to the sudden shouting. He simply turned and faced them.

Solomon: State your intentions.

Emi: Straight to the point, huh? Well, I see that you're interested in the Greater Grail for some reason. Do you desire it?

Solomon: Nonsense. I am inspecting the potency of the leylines available in the area.

Emi: So you're looking for an extra source of mana, eh? I wonder why...

Solomon: You lie.

Emi: Hmm?

Solomon: I am aware of what you are, girl. If you came here to seek answers you already know, then I severely overestimated you.

Emi: Hmph. Someone's grumpy today.

Zaegar: Well, I dunno what this is all about, so I'll ask what I wanna know, and you'll answer. First of all, can there be a Grand Foreigner?

Emi: Seriously?!

Ophis: You're STILL surprised by that? Come on, girl, keep up.

Emi sighed in exasperation, while Solomon regarded Zaegar with a mix of amusement and curiosity.

Solomon: The concept of a Grand Foreigner is indeed intriguing. however, I believe it is impossible. 

Zaegar: Come again?

Emi: Zaegar, just give it up already!

He wouldn't. Whenever Zaegar heard that something was impossible, he took it as a personal challenge.

Zaegar: Watch me, fuckers. Next, you feel weird. You make me wanna kill you and give you a hand at the same time. Ophis?

Ophis: Yeah, same for me.

Fou: Fou... Fou?! Fou, fou!

Zaegar: whatcha mean we had to tell you that? Fuck off, furball. Anyway, why's that?

Solomon: Your decision, Foreigner. Will you seek my demise, or will you offer your assistance?

Zaegar: I'm kinda set on saving a world for the time being, but I feel that you know why I feel like that.

Solomon: ...I see. How intriguing. 

Zaegar: Answer the question. And if you come at me with that "You must find the answer for yourself" bullshit, I-

Solomon: But you must.

Zaegar: Yeah, I figured as much. I guess I gotta find out on my- FUCK THAT! TELL ME, ASSHOLE!

Solomon: Enough. I have a question for you. Why did you come here?

Emi: Isn't it obvious? Out of 9 Servants, you both are the ones who can fight the Types. Archer is Archer, and Saber is complicated. Every other Servant is useless against aliens' size of cities that literally can't die and doesn't operate under any sort of human logic.

Ophis: Do you see anyone here that operates by human logic?

Emi: ...Point taken, but still. Strategy meeting, that's all.

Solomon: Hmm... This is an odd question, but are you able to survive in space?

Zaegar: Of course I can.

Emi: You can? But you're a living person.

Zaegar: I'm Zaegar, fuckers. Space battles are just another playground for me. Plus, it sounds like a hell of a good time.

Emi: ...I'm not even going to ask how that makes sense.

Ophis: Nothing makes sense for this annoying creature.

Solomon: You can? Good. 

Emi: ...I see. You want to go directly to space to combat Type-Venus before it can descend into orbit and minimize the damage it could do.

Solomon: Correct.

Emi: Zaegar?

Zaegar: Yeah, I'm down with that. I don't mind anyone seeing my awesomeness as I save the world, buuuuuuut I just can't have my fun with my Mistress around.

Emi: Hmph. Shut up, stupid Servant.

Zaegar: Yeah, yeah. Anyway, I'm ready to take off at any time. 

Solomon: Unfortunately, my case is different. I must remain here to gather all the mana I possibly can.

Zaegar: Why?

Solomon: Because the battle against Type-Venus will require an immense amount of magical energy. I must ensure that I am fully prepared to face it.

Ophis: So, you're gathering mana now to release it later when the battle comes?

Solomon: Exactly.

Ophis: ...Huh. No reaction to the talking cape of sorts?

Solomon: A talking cape is far from the weirdest thing in this world.

Emi: Speaking of which, have you been to South America?

Solomon: Yes. The Crystal Valley is still intact, meaning it remains dormant.

Emi: So this isn't the Promised Day. That's a relief.

Zaegar: Uh, what's up with South America? Aside from the fact that it's amazingly far less of a shitshow than North America right now.

Emi: Nothing you should concern yourself with. 

Zaegar: Oh, okay. Are we done here, Mistress? 'Cause I was THIS close to solving eleven across and you had to come along and ruin it.

Emi: Achievement.

Zaegar: Bitch what?

Emi: Eleven across. Achievement.

Zaegar: OI! DON'T DO THAT! THAT DEFEATS THE PURPOSE OF THE CROSSWORD!

Emi smirks.

Emi: Now you know how it feels, hm?

Zaegar: Jeez, you've got it rough. Let's get going. Not to the pubs, though, since they UNJUSTLY banned me.

Fou: Fou?

Zaegar: Yeah, all of them.

Emi: (sarcastically) Yes, because it wasn't your fault that you A. Started a brawl that destroyed the furniture, B. Brought an apparent minor, AKA me, and C. Set the whole place on fire just for a laugh.

Zaegar: I know, right?! 

Emi sighs.

Emi: Let's just go. Grand Caster, if you don't have the necessary amount of mana for the mission, then I guess I could give you a hand.

Solomon: Much appreciated. I will notify you should that be the case.

Zaegar: Yeah, you do that. Shall we?

Zaegar extended a hand to his Mistress, which she took with a smile. He teleported them out of there, leaving the Grand Caster to his thoughts.

Solomon (Thoughtfully): Ambiguous beings like him possess the potential to be both a destroyer and a savior. Their unpredictability is their greatest strength and their gravest danger.

Scene Break - Later, Fuyuki City Mall

Zaegar: And that's how I managed to out pizza the hut.

Emi: I have no idea what you're talking about. Could you make sense for once in a while?

Fou: Fooooou...

Ophis: There's as much chance of that happening as Amy Schumer being actually funny and telling original jokes.

Zaegar: HA!

You would think that with armageddon on the horizon, they would be making preparations. But no, Zaegar and his Mistress decided to kill time in a bakery store that Zaegar had taken a liking to.

Since the store was frequented by women (Meaning more sweets for him), he had attracted the eyes of quite a number of them, and the cute animal perched atop his shoulder didn't help.

One uncharacteristically fierce glare from Emi was all it took for them to back off, much to Zaegar's amusement.

Zaegar: By the way, how come this is the fourth time that this gig has happened?

Emi: Because no one has won the previous Grail Wars. 

Zaegar: Really? What happened to the ones left standing? They died before they could get a wish or something?

Emi: Pretty much. Usually, that would be improbable, but as we've seen so far, no smart magus cares about the rules. If there were a Ruler, however, then maybe things would even out.

Zaegar: Ruler?

Emi: Another Extra Class, like yours. They're mediators who enforce the rules of the war and have special privileges. 

Ophis: So an SJW, you mean.

Zaegar: Heh. What about the "Grand Servants" like that Solomon guy? Any special qualifications for the role? 

Emi: They differ. Grand Casters, for example, have to possess high levels of Clairvoyance. Some examples are Merlin-

Fou: FOU!

Emi: Yes, yes, everyone knows he's a good-for-nothing scoundrel. He's most likely watching us right now and updating that idiotic site of his.

Zaegar: Sounds like a loser.

Fou: (nod) Kyu.

Suddenly, they overheard a rather interesting conversation between two customers.

Customer 1: Ah~! Magi☆Mari just updated! Did you see it?!

Customer 2: Yeah! "Albinos with creepy little girls are always a dangerous combination, especially if they have a stupid critter. They're jerks, so it's better if they all died ♡!"

Customer 1: Such wisdom!... Hey, over there, you suck!

They twitched. Suddenly there were two vacant seats in the store and gunshots were heard. Everyone just chalked it up to the gas leak problem.

Soon enough, they were back and resumed their conversation as if nothing had happened.

Zaegar: ...Y'know, since you're connected to that Root thing and pretty much know everything, doesn't that count as that Clairvoyance thing?

Emi: Yes. Your point is that?

Zaegar: Hmm... Nah, just an idea. Don't worry about it.

Emi: Hmm. Anywho, I meant to ask how are your mana reserves.

Zaegar: Mana? I have that. Well, if I do, then I'm alright. Why?

Emi: The only time I have ever supplied you with mana was at the time of your summoning. As a living being, I don't have to give you mana as much as other Servants.

Zaegar: That's pretty nifty.

Emi: It is. Then again, if anyone else tried to summon you, they would be dead on the spot out of sheer mana consumption.

Zaegar smirks.

Zaegar: Trying to establish your dominance as my one and only Mistress, are you?

Emi: Guh, y-yes, as far as I'm concerned, no Master is suited to have you other than me.

Zaegar: (sarcastically) Yes, Mistress. Your wishes are my commands and all that jazz. I bow only to you, yadda yadda yadda.

Emi: Hmph.

Fou: Fou... Fou, fou?

Zaegar: Mana transfer? What's that supposed to mean, furball?

Emi: Huh?!

Fou: Kyu. Fou, fou!

Zaegar: What do you mean by unconventional ways to transfer mana?

Emi: Don't you dare-!

Fou: Fooooou, fou-

Emi: AH, SHUT UP, YOU INFERNAL CRITTER!

The Servant raised an eyebrow at seeing his agitated Mistress, who tried to strangle Fou. She looked quite flustered about that mana transfer issue.

Zaegar: No, seriously, what's up with mana transfer?

Ophis: I don't think either of us wanna know that.

Zaegar: Well, I do! Mistress?

Emi: NOTHING! There is NOTHING unusual about transferring mana! Just transfer it from point A to B, and voila! Mana transfer!

She was blushing profusely. Zaegar wasn't convinced by this explanation. He made it a personal mission to know what "Mana Transfer" was all about.

Oh, right. There was the whole "Saving The World From Aliens" gig going on.

Business as usual.

Scene Break - Evening, Outer Streets

It wouldn't be a stretch to say that Waver Velvet's levels of stress at the moment could have killed 100 men in an instant were they weaponized.

Rider, for his part, looked quite the opposite. It was kind of irritating to Waver, seeing him so casual about the literal armageddon.

Rider: You look constipated, boy. That's not good for you.

Waver: What?! Of course, I'm not!

Rider: Then why's that face for?

Waver: I could ask you the same thing! How are you so calm when... all of THIS is happening?

Rider: I look like that to you. Well, I'm not entirely calm, you know. The world itself is in grave danger, after all. These might be our last moments.

Waver: And you're not scared?!

Rider: Kind of? 

Waver: What do you mean "kind of"?! We could die!

Rider: I think we both knew that was a possibility by entering the Grail War. Didn't you say you would fight?

Waver: I-I did, but that was a dumb decision! I really don't know what I'm doing anymore!

Rider: And by making those dumb decisions, your true nature was unleashed at that moment!

Waver: My true nature?

Rider: That miserable state of yours is the sign of a conqueror. You know how small you are, and yet you decided to fight something greater than the war itself. 

Waver: That's not a compliment. You're just making fun of me.

Rider: Indeed! You're an incorrigible idiot, boy! Just like me!

Waver: Like you?

Rider: Glory lies beyond the horizon. Our desires are greater than ourselves, and we both are great fools for pursuing them. So, a contract with an idiot like you feels perfect for me.

Waver: Oh... Uh, right. Thanks, I guess.

Rider: Don't mention it. It should be almost time, so let's relax and-

He paused as he frowned. Waver mimicked him as he felt something was very wrong.

Waver: Rider?

Rider: The river.

Scene Break

Zelretch put down his cup of tea with an annoyed sigh. Arcueid did the same as she frowned.

Arcueid: Hmm. That's the same energy I felt when I disposed of that disgusting thing.

Zelretch: Of COURSE it has to happen NOW of all times. With annihilation on our doorstep, no less!

He huffed as he brought up his phone and made a call. The receiver answered seconds after.

Zaegar: (Phone call) Fucking hell, what do you want you old bitch?!

Zelretch: Zaegar? Yes, we have a situation. Can I trust you to deal with it quickly?

Zaegar: (Phone call) Nah, you deal with it, Mr. Magician. Imma go to space.

Zelretch: What?

Zaegar: (Phone call) Yeah. Fuck you and Bye!

The call ended. Zelretch grumbled as he stood up with Arcueid in tow.

He made it a point to not intervene in grail wars, but at this point, everything was pretty much allowed.

Damn it, this had to happen right before he was about to investigate the mystery of the Makiri family, but that would have to wait.

Scene Break - Mt. Enzo

Zaegar: Yeah, not so smug now, huh bitch? Anyway, what's up?

Emi: It's Caster.

Ophis: Which one?

Emi: The normal one.

Zaegar Hmm. What's he up to?

Emi: Pretty much summoning Cthulhu.

Zaegar: Oh, okay.

Emi: ...That's it?

Zaegar: You would NOT believe how many times I've seen that happening. Don't worry about it.

As they approached the designated spot, Solomon stood exactly where he said he would be, true to his word and unfazed by the passing of time.

Solomon: It's time.

Emi: Yes. Do you have enough mana?

Solomon: Yes, fortunately. 

Zaegar: Yo, how does mana transfer work?

Emi: DO NOT answer that.

Solomon: We should focus on the task at hand. We leave immediately.

Zaegar: The others can handle normal Caster, and we save the world. Heh, I'm SO gonna rub it on Goldiocks's face. Let's dance.

Emi: Um, before that... Zaegar?

Zaegar: What now bitch?

Emi: Please... Please come back to me.

Zaegar: Pft, so dramatic! This will take a few minutes. Until then, go see what Caster's up to, yeah? The big boys are gonna handle things.

He chuckled as he gently patted her on the head. Fou jumped off his shoulder and placed himself on her own. She watched as he stepped back and faced the Grand Caster.

Zaegar: After you, Mr. Grand Guy.

Solomon: So be it.

A bright light briefly blinded Emi. After regaining her senses, she looked up and saw a violet meteor rising to the sky.

Emi: (In thought) My ray of light, always shining so brightly... I know you'll come back to me.

Fou: Fou, fou.

Emi: Yes, yes, I know. Let's see what they can do to kill Caster.

Without any time to waste, she was off to the riverside. She wasn't worried anymore.

She trusted her Servant, and being worried about him would only insult his strength.

Scene Break - Fuyuki Riverside

Saber had to admit that Irisviel's reckless driving was useful to get to the scene in time, even if she felt like she had to write some sort of will if Irisviel caused an accident.

They exited the car and saw Caster standing in the middle of the river. There was a massive amount of magical energy in the air, so whatever he had planned was not going to be subtle.

Irisviel: Why did this have to happen now of all times?!

Saber had to agree. For all they knew, the Aristoteles were right at Earth's doorstep and Caster wasn't being helpful at all.

Caster saw them and bowed his head. Saber felt rather disgusted by this, and she couldn't be blamed for that.

Caster: Welcome, Holy Virgin! I am overjoyed that we have met again!

Saber: Caster, stop this now! The entire world is at stake, and you dare to wreak havoc at this crucial moment?!

Caster: I am terribly sorry, Jeanne, but I shall not cease. This banquet of death that I, Gilles De Rais, have prepared, everyone shall eat their fill!

He laughed as he was suddenly swallowed by something emerging from under the water. 

Caster: God in Heaven, with words of condemnation, I praise your holy name! O, arrogant God! O, cruel God! We shall pull you down from your throne! The resentment and rage of the oppressed shall reach your almighty divinity!

It was a gigantic mass of writhing abominations coalesced into one being. Indeed, it could be called the true form of the diabolic underworld, a massive extradimensional evil god that was at least the size of a building.

Saber and Irisviel could only stare in horror as the monster writhed. Lightning arched in the area. Sure enough, Rider arrived behind them on his mount, accompanied by his Master.

Rider: Hey, Saber!

Saber: Rider.

Waver: Why is this happening NOW of all times?!

Irisviel: That's what I said. It's just so inconvenient.

Rider: I'm guessing we can all agree on something, then. Luckily we're on a truce already.

Irisviel: Indeed. We must make haste since that monster is feeding off Caster's mana for the moment. If it reaches the populace and devours them, it'll become self-sustaining.

Rider: Got it. But we'll need to kill Caster himself for that, and he's shielded by those thick walls of flesh... That came out wrong, but never mind that.

???: And we have currently no information on what exactly Caster's Noble Phantasm is.

The newcomer was Lancer, who sported quite a serious look.

Rider: Oh, right. Well, damn, this is pretty much the worst-case scenario.

???: Of course, it isn't. It could be much, MUCH worse.

They looked to the side and saw a peculiar little girl in a dress with an adorable critter on her shoulder.

Emi: Talk about Diabolus Ex Machina, though. What a drag.

Saber: Master of Foreigner, and... A phantasmal?

The aforementioned critter gave Saber an unreadable look. Saber, for her part, felt that the creature was strangely familiar.

Emi: Emi, if you will. This annoying beast is Fou.

Fou: Fou!

Waver: Whatever! Where's Foreigner?!

Emi: Oh, he's going to space.

Waver: WHAT THE FUCK?!

Emi: Look up.

They followed her pointing fingers to the sky. They saw a purple meteor soaring through the night sky, disappearing beyond the clouds.

Irisviel: Is that Foreigner? Wait, can he-

Emi: Yes, he can fly. Yes, he can survive in space. No, you can't make sense of it. He's already left with Grand Caster.

Rider: But why, though?

Emi: Because you're all useless against what they're fighting. And before you complain, think of what you can bring against something the size of a city that doesn't have the concept of death. Do you see that monster? Type-Venus is at least 50 times larger, 100 times stronger, and literally can't die. 

Everyone was silent at this revelation since they couldn't find something to provide against something like that. Emi didn't care and resumed her summary.

Emi: The Foreigner, Archer, who won't fight, and the Grand Servant are the only ones capable of fighting the Types. Saber's sword? Perhaps with more restrictions lifted, but I digress.

Saber: How do you-?

Emi: It doesn't matter. Caster has a book, destroy it. If not, you'll have to destroy the monster in its entirety. Now, would you mind making yourselves actually competent and killing that unsightly thing? I'll be watching you, so don't disappoint me.

She lazily waved her hand and was gone in an instant. There was silence until Rider spoke.

Rider: Hey, boy, make sure you don't grab yourself a woman like that, alright? They're dangerous to your health.

Waver: Rider!

Rider: Yeah, yeah. Anyway, she wasn't joking, or that's what I think. 

Irisviel: Something the size of a city that can't die? Is that what's threatening the world?

Lancer: Regrettably, I reckon none of my abilities would be of assistance against a foe of that magnitude.

Rider: Yeah, pretty much. I mean, I have THAT, but I can't drag an entire city into it... Man, I feel so robbed!

Irisviel: Indeed, but we must take care of Caster here while Foreigner and Grand Caster fight the Aristoteles. Saber?

Saber (In thought) That girl... She knows about the restraints of my Noble Phantasm. How much does she claim to know?

Irisviel: Saber? Are you alright?

Saber: Ahem. Yes. We shall eliminate Caster once and for all.

Rider: Then I'll take the lead! Let's go, boy!

Waver: Not agaaaaaaaaain!

He screamed as the Gordius Wheel took off into the sky. Irisviel smiled at Saber.

Irisviel: Good luck.

Saber: Thank you. I shall not fail.

With her clothes changed into her battle armor, Saber was off like a shot. Due to receiving a divine blessing, she landed on the water and began to sprint on it like it was the land itself.

There was the mystery of the eighth Master, her unusual knowledge, and the strangely familiar critter that accompanied her. 

But now, it was time for action, not for pondering.

Scene Break - Outer Space, The Moon

Miles above Fuyuki, Zaegar and Solomon had cleared the different layers of the atmosphere in record time.

Soon enough, they reached the surface of the moon due to Zaegar being impatient and speeding up, having dragged Solomon along the ride since he was too slow.

It might interest you that there was a satellite on their way there, and Zaegar decided to blow it up just for funsie.

Zaegar: Ah, the moon. Stepping on it for what, the septillionth time? Well, the view never gets old. Ain't that right?

He gave Solomon a look, but he was too busy admiring the Earth from their spot. He couldn't really blame the guy.

Solomon: This world really is a beautiful one. 

Zaegar: I'm guessing your future is a complete dystopia, then. 

Solomon: Yes. All because of them. But now that I've seen its magnificence, I will fight to protect it.

Zaegar: Well, duh, that's what a Grand Servant does, right?

Solomon: Correct.

Ophis: I feel like the Holy Grail War would've been pretty damn complicated if it was on the moon.

Zaegar: What, you mean something like the "Moon Holy Grail War"? Sounds dumb. What do you think, Grand dude?

Solomon: It sounds unnecessarily complex. 

Zaegar: Yep.

Suddenly, both Zaegar and Solomon perked up. There was an otherworldly pressure weighing down on them, but they shrugged it off without effort. Key term: Otherworldly.

They turned their heads and saw the source of the pressure. Zaegar whistled.

Zaegar: Man, Mistress was right. Those guys are pretty useless against THAT.

Solomon: Of course. We're facing Venus itself.

Zaegar: ...It sort of looks like an angel.

It did. Though the entity was foreign, it looked strangely humanoid, with massive wings that resembled trees and spores as feathers.

They knew that this was the Ultimate One. The first of many.

Zaegar twitched as he felt like he was being singled out. Type-Venus's head slowly turned towards him.

Zaegar: ...Yeah, it's after me.

Ophis: Duh. You're the one who attracted it in the first place.

Solomon: So, it begins. 

A potent surge of mana radiated from the Grand Caster, his presence commanding attention.

Solomon: The solar system itself sought to destroy this beautiful world. But it shall not perish. Not while I draw breath. You tarnished its glory in the distant future, but right now, I will fight against that fate!

Zaegar: (In thought) Looks like we're getting a full-blown hero's monologue. What a drama queen.

Solomon: Thus, at the world's behest, I have been summoned. I am Grand Caster King Solomon, the king of mages. 

Zaegar: Anyways Solomon dude enough hero monologue, let's murder it!

Solomon: Very well.

Zaegar grinned as he did what he did best: Charge headfirst with extreme prejudice. The Grand Servant followed after him.

They were two Servants against the manifestation of an entire planet.

Just an average day.