Chapter 54

Was that true? Did she really say she was falling for him?

"Alex..." he whispered. He was stunned by what he heard that the words jumbled in his mouth.

Was his dream finally happening? Did she really say she loved him?

He stared at her for a moment, settling the words inside his head.

"Are you saying.... you love me, too?" he asked.

He could not contain his joy. He felt like a teenager falling in love for the first time and finally his love was accepted.

After several years of waiting, she had finally confessed and felt it.

"Robbie..." and she held his cheek. "I wanted to feel the same way as you but..."

His smile turned sour as he frowned at her.

She was still in doubt until now.

"How can I erase those doubts, Alex?" he said, trying not to sound frustrated.

She sighed. "You don't have to do anything, Robbie. I just have to figure this thing out myself."

He sighed and let her go. He walked away from her and shoved his hands over his head. He hated this kind of game.

He felt like she was playing with his emotions.

"Robbie..." Alex called.

"For how long, Alex? Don't you think I have waited long enough for you to figure things out?" he spat out.

"Robbie..."

"How can I convince you, Alex? I felt like no matter what I do, you won't be able to fully give your heart to me."

"I wanted to but..."

"But what?"

She stared at him.

Was this really the right time to talk about this?

She wanted to ask him everything about that day. To let her feel secured that he never had feelings to that guy or any guy for that matter....that he was truly just for her.

Just her all these years...

He stepped towards her and cupped her face.

"If I needed to make love to you every f-king day, I would, just to prove to you that I desire only you. That my heart only belongs to you. You just don't know how much I missed you every single day you were gone and now that you're here, I could not resist not to have you for myself. Sht, Alex! Don't you think I would even try to kiss you if I am not into this deep? Do you remember that day when we first make love? I kept your dress because I wanted to be reminded of the special moment we had.

"I love you, Alex. So much it hurts that every time I see you with Miguel, I just wished it was me. Every time you cry when he breaks your heart, I wanted to kill him because I hated to see you getting hurt. I have built my company because of my obsession with your lips, and every time I make a new shade, I was thinking of you.

How much more do you want me to prove to you, Alex? How much more?"

The desperation in his voice had made her feel worse.

Why can't she cast her doubts aside?

She was able to risk her heart to Miguel so many times but she was afraid to give her heart to him fully.

She closed her eyes for a moment as she remembered the first time they made love.

That day when she accused him of being gay, he was mad as hell and yet, his anger melted away the moment she challenged him.

The moment where he did not hesitate to prove to her that she was wrong to think of him that way.

"It's not what you think..." he had said a few days ago. The image of the two men kissing was still in his mind and yet, she closed her eyes a memory that had long been gone suddenly came back to her.

"I love you..." he had whispered and she did not remember it before because of the liquor drowning her head. He had said it two times before she fell asleep.

But now it was all clear. He had tried to tell her how he felt before... and now he was still trying. She could feel the frustration in his voice. She knew him to be a little impatient sometimes in which he had passed on to his daughter as well.

That was why his business thrived. He knew how to push people to the limit and still kept them in line. He was bossy and yet, a charmer.

But with her, he had been patient... patiently waiting for her to love him back. More than twenty years he had waited and yet, here she was unsure of what she felt for him.

"Alex..." he whispered. "I will wait until you're ready but I do hope you give me the chance. I promise I won't hurt you. Don't be afraid to take that risk on me because I guarantee you, I would take good care of your heart. Keep it and lock it safely so no one can steal you away from me again."

She smiled as tears formed in her eyes. She did not deserve him. He was too precious and any woman would be lucky to have him, and yet among all, he chose her.

Why her? She was damaged goods. Every man that she gave herself into had just treated her like trash and here he was offering his love for her like she deserved it.

"You deserve better..." she remembered him say.

Every little thing he did... those sweet moments where he made her feel special suddenly came into view. How could she missed all these? She was so hang up in her issues that she did not see the good things that he had done for her.

He had been a good friend... a confidant... and now, a lover.

She cupped his face as she pulled him towards her, pressing her lips onto his. She could not deny that their desires for each other burned each time their bodies touched. But she knew it was more than that.

Her heart began to quicken as she wanted to show him that she was willing to give it to him despite of the uncertainty that her mind dictated.

She wanted her heart to feel at rest. This feeling of being wanted, desired.. loved, despite of all the mistakes she had made was too good to pass up on.

He needed that security, too, as much as she did. After that night, her heart remembered now why she never dated another guy again. That eventhough there was at least one or two who showed kindness to her.. and promised to take care of her and Sasha, she still longed for someone.

She did not realize it until now.

She longed for him. The father of his child. Her husband to be.

Her best friend.

He was perfect.

Suddenly, as tears fell from her cheeks, she admitted to herself... and the words came out...

"I love you, Robbie," she blurted out as she let go of his lips.