Chapter 29– Forgotten Memories & the Bearwolf

As the group walked in awkward silence, they came to an unexpected halt when the hallway split into two separate paths. Hana frowned.

"Which one does the map say to go in?" she questioned.

Sen shook his head, looking at the hologram displayed by his techno watch with disappointment. "It doesn't say. It just shows the obvious routes we took. Everything beyond that is fuzzy," he replied.

"SO WHAT'S THE POINT OF A GOD DAMN MAP!" Baru growled.

"Because If they blatantly told us where to go, that wouldn't be much of a challenge. They want to challenge not only our senses but our minds as well. Being a Knight doesn't mean only having strong senses but also a keen and collected mind that will adapt to different scenarios. So, in this case, we'll have to choose independently, " Sen explained.

"Blah, blah, I don't care about all this mind game stuff. I just wanna slay monsters and call it a day," Baru yawned. "You probably won't go very far then," Sen shook his head impudently. "Kaiyo, can you hear any noise from one of these tunnels? You're far better at controlling Hearing than I am, and more than likely, if there are sounds, that must mean people," Sen turned to Kaiyo, who stammered in response.

"I-I'll try…" Walking to the cross-section, she closed her eyes and fruitfully opened her Sense.

I wonder what it's like to have hearing as a super sense; it must be harder to control than touch. Hana watched as Kaiyo carefully and delicately listened to her surroundings. Moments passed in silence.

While Hana impatiently waited, she hesitantly glanced at Ayame. She still had her head down with an impassive face, a very drastic change from her usual sour and cocky demeanor.

Does she feel guilty? I didn't know a person like her could feel such emotions. Hana snorted. I don't know their past, but it seems complicated.

"I hear something!" Kaiyo whispered.

"From where?"

Kaiyo closed her eyes once more. "I think it's coming from the left tunnel!" she said excitedly.

"Good job, let's start heading to the left tunnel," Sen commanded. They all nodded, except for Ayame, who just followed silently.

What the hell is her problem? Did what Sen said affect her that much? Fine, I know I'm gonna regret this, but she's really starting to piss me off. Hana's pace slowed so she could fall back.

"Hey?" Hana waved her hand. "What's up?" Ayame looked at her, her light blue eyes shining with irritation. "So, what was the argument you had with your brother all about?" Hana inquired.

"It doesn't concern you," she replied coldly.

"Well, if you're tagging along with us, we can't let you have those arguments, or we're going to have to throw you out," Hana joked.

"Hmph, it's not like I want to be here. I was forced to join," Ayame retorted.

"Yeah, yeah…" Hana rolled her eyes. Yeah, there's no point in talking with this bi*ch.

But yet, Hana couldn't help but relate to her. In the end, Hana knew the pain of losing someone all too well. In a way, Hana saw herself in Ayame.

For a long time, she viewed life the same way after the loss of her father. When Hana exchanged a few blows at Ayame, she would catch a glimpse of her dull and lifeless eyes. It was hard fighting someone who had the same eyes as she did.

Not a lot of people understood the level of pain a child went through when experiencing that grief. It changes them forever. It wasn't a scare. It was a broken bone that never healed. 

 Is it really wrong to hate life when life itself is worth hating? 

#

Hana started to forget that awful day. She used to remember it quite well, but not so much anymore. In a way, she was thankful she didn't have a perfect memory. Hana would undoubtedly go insane if that memory replayed in her mind repeatedly.

The words her mother muttered that day were now fuzzy and messy, and the things she did after were starting to fade away. But she remembered one thing; it was probably the only thing she did.

I remember crying. 

If Hana didn't know better, she probably would've guessed she cried for a few days straight. However, when asking her mother this question, she simply replied with–

"You cried for a while, but soon after, tears wouldn't fall from your face anymore. You would just stare at the ceiling in bed, wide awake. I would ask if you couldn't sleep, but you stayed silent. I'm sorry I couldn't help back then; I was a useless mother..." Her mother would sob, reminiscing those painful memories. 

"I-It's fine, Mom. What's in the past is the past; don't worry about me!" Hana would often display herself as strong-willed and resilient in front of others. The truth was she was fragile like glass. She wanted to be in someone's strong arms, crying within their grasp while they stroked her hair. Hana wanted to feel protected and at peace. 

But she never had a chance to feel that way. If it wasn't working slave hours to support her family's franchise struggles and medical bills, it was taking care of her ill mother before and after she got back to school. 

Hana had to be a father for her family in a sense. It was painful and a struggle to keep up with. Her body was durable, so fatigue wasn't quite an issue, but her mind was breaking down. 

"I wonder what life would be if father was still here. What would life look like? Would he come home late after work and get drunk? Would he argue with Mom over little things? Would he smash beer bottles on the ground when arguing? Would he even congratulate us when we got good grades? What kinda of presents would he buy us for Christmas? Would he calm us when we had bad dreams? I wonder," Hana had said one day while she looked through the window.

The rain had poured vigorously that day, yet the moon was still out, shining rays of its light through the cold rain. 

"I don't know," Sen shrugged beside her, looking through the same window from the comfort of their home. "Maybe one day we'll find out..." he muttered to himself, escaping Hana's ears.

"Hmm? You say something, Sen?"

He dismissed her question with a wave of his hand. "Nah, it's nothing. I was just gonna say it's worthless to ponder over that fact." 

"I see. You're probably right about that," she sighed, then turned her gaze at the moon once again. "Sen, do you still remember what Dad looked like?" 

Sen didn't respond; he followed her gaze at the moon with a grim expression before finally giving an answer. 

"I remember everything..."

"I see–"

Sen wasn't finished. "Except for him." 

Hana tilted her head, puzzled. "What do you mean?" 

"I don't know why, but when I try to remember him. It's all a blur. Even when moms tell me his eye color and hair, his face remains a mystery to me. It feels like my memory of him was wiped clean. Although that obviously isn't the case, given I remember things he used to say to me." 

"What would he say?" 

Sen yawned, leaning his hand by the window counter. "He once told me, 'God gave us power, then punished us for our greed." 

Hana blinked. "What the f*ck does that mean?" 

Sen didn't respond and continued spewing out things she had no understanding of. "Humanity itself was built off our own greed and immoralities. Humans kept killing each other, raping, pillaging, destroying ourselves as well as Mother Nature. We don't deserve to be alive after everything we've done. So, God punished us for our foolishness. He gave us what we so desired the most." 

"Huh? What da f*ck are you yappin' about, Sen? What did he give us?" 

"He gave us power and, in return, punished us for our greed." 

Hana felt like her head was about to explode with that quote. "Guess I answered my own question with that. Geez, our father sure was mysterious. Maybe a little delusional, too," she chuckled. 

"That he was," her brother murmured in agreement. 

"HAHAHAHAHA!" she laughed more loudly, filling her house with her own cackles. However, her fake laugh soon turned into small sobs. "HA...ha....ha...." 

"Drip..."

"Huh?" Hana looked at her palm. Tears fell from her cheeks, and she couldn't stop it for some reason. "F*ckin hell man..." her voice broke, trying to contain herself from crying. 

"Cry, Hana," Sen demanded, still staring at the moon. She gawked at her brother with tears streaming down. "If you have the ability to cry, don't try to fight back. If I could, I would also. Stop trying to be strong for the sake of our family; learn to be vulnerable and weak. That's what makes people human." He explained with a blunt expression, patting her on the head. 

Feeling his fingers run through her hair, she couldn't help but think to herself as she cried out. 

Why aren't you crying, Sen? Can you even cry at all? 

#

"Listen, I'm sorry to hear about your mother," Hana told Ayame as they walked into the dungeon hallway. "I'm just a bit curious about what your brother has to do with it."

"Could you leave me alone?" she snapped.

Hana gave a tiresome shack of her head before replying. "If it makes you feel any better, my father also died. So, I understand the pain; no one's asking you to let go of that."

"That doesn't concern you. I won't go into your business, so please don't go into mine," Ayame said sternly.

I should just give up trying to find out what actually happened. Hana let out a defeated sigh. Oh well, I should take my own advice and not concern myself with other people-

"WAIT!" Kaiyo stopped. "I hear something!" Hana, breaking off from her thoughts, peered close to her with excitement. Huh, this challenge seems a little too easy.

"What do you hear?" Sen asked. Kaiyo took one last moment to concentrate. "I hear some sort of growling? I don't know what that is supposed to be. At first, I thought it was maybe someone crying, but it definitely sounds a little odd," she frowned with confusion. "Wait, it's getting louder?"

Sen narrowed his eyes. "That doesn't make any sense. Why would someone come in the tunnels-" he stopped. "Wait a moment, I can hear it too." Sen slowly started to walk onward. The tunnel then suddenly curved to the side.

Why would the tunnel suddenly curve to the side? "I wonder–"

"AHHH!" Kaiyo screamed in pure terror, dropping to the ground at the start of the corner.

"What? What is it?" Hana quickly rushed to her aid. Kaiyo's gaze seemed to lock on something in the curved tunnel's shadows. Hana narrowed her eyes in confusion.

"Everyone, don't move a muscle…" Sen brashly demanded.

It took a couple of moments for her to realize in the shadows was… a MONSTER.

Its big, brown, squared face twitched, and his large, savage fangs stretched out of his mouth. The beast stepped into the light. It was so big she wondered how it even managed to get in here.

"A bearwolf…" Kaiyo murmured in terror. Its large face resembled a simple bear and its body stretched long with visible muscles rippling underneath its thin coat of fur. The monster looked at them with pure malice as it licked its chops.

"Don't move an inch…" Sen whispered, freezing in place like a statue. "Bearwolves are silver-ranked monsters. They're also deaf, meaning they can't hear what we're talking about right now. They also don't have human sight either. They can only see heat patterns when prey moves, similar to common snakes. Although they appear to be at a large disadvantage, their sheer size, strength, and agility instantly heighten their status to a silver-ranked monster. Just stay where you are, and don't move…" Sen's order wasn't needed, as Hana was already frozen in fear.

The monster flared its nostrils, staring directly in their direction. Its eyes narrowed in confusion while taking one step forward. It sees our body heat, but since we're not moving, he doesn't even think we're here.

"I'm scared…" Hono breathed, eyes widening in panic. Baru managed to stutter out some reassurance. "I-it's fine. If it attacks, I'll defeat it."

Doubtful, I'm not even sure I can take down that beast with my fists. Hana felt a sweat drop fall down her forehead. This doesn't even make sense. Sen explained before that the academy didn't use real snakes because it's too dangerous for the contestants, so why allow this? This is so bullshit. Are they really tricking us into thinking this was going to be easy? Hana wanted to slap herself across the face for believing such a lie.

"GRRR!!!" the monster growled in a deep, throbbing tone. It took a few more steps in her direction, leading its muzzle until it was only a few inches away from her face. Hana felt the hot and putrid breath of the monster while it sniffed her long silver-white hair.

She wanted to gag. But she needed to listen to Sen, no sudden movements. But for how long? Are we just supposed to wait here until the challenge ends? There has to be another way.

Kaiyo respired quietly beside her, her lip shuddering with dread. Screw it… Hana didn't care what happened to her anymore. I need to put my sense to use, God damn it!

She tensed her whole body, quickly unlocking her Sense. I'll murder this monster's ass. Before she could even think about hitting the monster, it suddenly reared back, almost noticing the strength that flowed through her body.

Provoked by Hana, the Bearwolf let out an ear-raping howl while lolling out its large pink tongue, revealing lines of dagger-sized teeth.

"Hana, you idiot…" Hana cursed herself. Usually, Sen would be the first one to tell her that, but this time, Hana knew she had messed up.