Ask why...

Shan watched the new guy collapse in front of his eyes. He had never ever seen someone crying so silently, yet so much. Not even muscles moved in his face and it was scary, to be honest.

"Fuck, Lucy will kill us. Do something! Calm him down!" Lili gave Shan a slap over his shoulder and he could only stare at her, eyes widened in shock.

"I just took your side, and you slapped me? And I'm not good at calming someone. You are better at it. You go!" Lili slapped him once more on the other shoulder.

"That's probably the most I've heard you say in the two years I've been here… And he is afraid of girls. Something not nice happened to him. He didn't slap me. He just spread his arms in shock and, unfortunately, hit my face." Shan now felt horrible. He knew how bad it must have been for the guy, having trauma. And he misunderstood too. Shit.

"Why are you yelling?" Lucy came in from the elevator side, seeing only that guy's back. Both Lili and Shan bit their lips and prayed they wouldn't die today. Lucy came closer and ran to Lili's arms.

"Long time no see. How is my future bride? Hyun, she is-..." Lucy turned around and just when she noticed the crying Hyunyeong behind her. When Lucy briefly said what happened, Lucy stared at Shan, killing him with her gaze.

"What?... Shan… I didn't know you were so heartless. Beating your fan… If I knew this, I would take him to Czechia and not here!" Did they have to make him feel even worse? His conscience was already beating him up inside his head.

"Go and calm him down somehow!" Lucy showed Shan towards Hyun. 

"And what am I supposed to do?!" Shan wasn't comfortable at all. He thought the guy was picking a fight with Lili, and now he was the bad one. Next time he won't get involved.

"I don't know... Hug him? Pat his back… Just make him calm down!" Lucy exclaimed and Shan sighed. He came closer to Hyun, who was just staring into nothing, his eyes bawling.

Shan remembered what Hyun yesterday did to him when he was puking and touched his back. He was caressing it up and down. It made a memory of someone nice doing it to him, but Shan just hoped to get over it soon, so he did not pay attention.

"Here, here. I'm sorry. I thought you slapped Lili. I'm really sorry for misunderstanding you," he said while patting his back.

"I'm sorry too, for startling you too." Lili peeked out from behind Lucy to apologize too. 

"Imssorssyort." Hyun's head fell on his chest and he mumbled something.

"What? We can't hear you," Shan asked, lowering himself to hear better.

"I'm sorry too. For everything." Hyun made a loud sobbing noise and ran off. He passed everyone and ran up the stairs. They just watched him disappear.

"Nice… This is not good. He will be holed up in his room for months again. Fuck…And I've made so much progress." Lucy sighed and turned to Lili.

"Don't worry about him. He is stronger than... Well, nevermind, he will get out of it. I have a perfect person who will help us…" They both turned to Shan. He raised his hands in a rejecting gesture but said nothing.

"Don't even think about not helping. He is your fan and you just slapped him without even hearing the reason why it happened. I'm on his and Lucy's side this time." Shan felt really betrayed by Lili's words. Was he so wrong in coming to help her?

"I'm still thankfully and actually happy you care so much you came to help. But you know I don't like violence. And you acted without thinking and just slapped him. You should have asked me or him what was going on while holding him or something like that, not attack him back." When she said it like that, Shan couldn't even complain. The purely logical argument was something he lost to.

"Okay. I will help him… But… I don't have time," he said, bowing his head down.

"It's okay, you can talk to him in your free time, or during the night. He can't sleep and I don't think after today he will even take the sleeping pills." Lucy made Shan curious about what happened. 

"He was attacked and molested during his sleep by some woman who thought he was someone else. It happened three weeks ago, so it's still fresh… he was actually in deep depression the first week. I worry…" Lucy stopped and shook her head. She answered as if she knew what Shan was thinking about.

"He would never do it, but I hate seeing him in this state," she continued. Shan touched his left wrist over the long sleeve he always wore. The unevenness of the skin wasn't visible, but he still knew what was underneath.

Shan nodded and walked up the stairs. Instead of going back to the computer room, he sent an apologetic message to the group chat and went up to the room opposite his. 

Shan stopped in front of the door, with his fist ready to knock. He halted and went one floor down to the kitchen, only then he went back up. Shan knocked on the door, but nobody answered. He tried it five more times, but still. 

A new surge of overwhelming feeling washed over him. His heartbeat quickened at the thought of what might be going on behind the door. Shan tried the handle and, to his surprise, the door opened. 

"I'm sorry, I'm coming in," he said, almost whispered, in fear. There was no one in the living room, but from the sound, he knew someone was in the shower. He knocked three more times on the shower door, but then decided to go in.

He entered and saw an unmoving body on the floor. He had his knees up, head down, and was just curled like a ball. Water falling on him. Shan's hands just gave up on what he was holding, let it go, and he took a step back, horrified. But then Shan woke up. Ran up to the laying person and kneeled beside him. He was too pale…