Chapter 36) – Troublemaker

A/N: Yo, Banana here. Before you read this chapter I wanted to mention a few things which will probably be good news, bad news and something you may have already assumed, or hoped, would/wouldn't happen.

Good news (for some) - I've written my first Lemon and I think it turned out pretty good. Bad news (for those same people) - You'll have to wait a little longer since it's not in this chapter, sorry. The reason I'm telling you this in advance is that it is a Yuri Lemon. For a while I've been unsure about giving this novel the Yuri tag as I wasn't completely sure I would involve anyone else with El and Mara. However, since I have finally decided to commit and involve other women going forward, I will update the tags to reflect that.

For the people that are reading this and don't like Yuri, I apologise if you feel misled due to my uncertainty and I will place ------ markings like I did for chapter 19 if you want to skip it, but they will signify when the Lemon starts, rather than when it ends. If that doesn't work for you, and you don't want to continue reading a Yuri novel, that's fine - it's your choice and I respect that. I appreciate you being willing to give the novel a read up until this point. Thank you.

That's all I wanted to say, hope you enjoy the chapter ❤

P.S. Lemon will be in chapter 40 😉

******

Stirring from my magically induced unconsciousness, I experienced the completely new sensation of waking up - and hoped to never feel it again.

My consciousness returned to me in a blur, not unlike the time I was created just over a month before, and it felt like no time had passed at all since I was robbed of my senses.

That was obviously not the case, however, as the sight that greeted me was not that of the rainbow bridge we were subdued on, but rather an opulently decorated room.

Fighting through the haze that I experienced in my mind, I recalled the last things I could remember before everything went black.

Once I had taken some time to clear my head of the fuzziness that lingered, and I had regained my bearings, I set about scanning my host to confirm that everything was okay with her.

Fortunately, I didn't have cause to worry. Mara was drooling and seemed completely at ease with her limbs spread all over the bed.

Her left arm was at a 90-degree angle by her head, her right arm was on her abs and her legs were akimbo. Basically, she was in a deep, but seemingly very enjoyable, sleep.

The only thing I did find concerning was the fact that she was wearing pyjamas.

Naturally, since I had bonded with Mara, the only clothing she wore was my shapeshifted form. Typically, there were no issues with that as a Klyntar, such as myself, did not need to sleep.

Unfortunately, due to Frigga knocking out both myself and Mara, my form reverted back into its incognito state - that I haven't needed to use frequently since the day I first bonded with Mara.

This meant that Mara's body would have been exposed to anyone present.

From what I could remember, that was only Thor and Frigga. But unless she was covered up immediately, there was no telling who could have seen my host's naked figure.

It seemed like I would have to speak with Frigga once Mara had woken up to determine who's eyes needed to be plucked out.

But before I got too caught up in my plans regarding Asgardian eyeballs, I made sure to remove the disrespectful fabric latched onto my host.

Scanning the pyjamas, I removed the incognito state of my form and replicated the clothing with the expertise I had built up over my, albeit short, lifetime.

I made sure not to completely shred the pyjamas my host was wearing as I removed them, and only cut them into a few hundred strips.

With my natural place in the world restored, I resumed my previous eyeball machinations.

------

After half an hour, or so, of contemplation about how best to go about disposing of Asgardian organs, Mara began to rouse from her sleep.

She opened her mouth wide to let out a yawn as her right hand began to scratch her abs.

Stretching out her legs as straight as she could, Mara's eyes slowly opened.

Unconcerned about our situation, the first words that came out of her mouth weren't to ask what had happened, "Huh, an unfamiliar ceiling… Always wanted to say that."

Since my host was awake, I created a head to speak with her, "How do you feel Mar? Does your head, or anywhere else, hurt?"

Sitting up in the bed, Mara felt around her body as she replied, "Hmm, I don't think so. I actually feel quite refreshed. But where are we El?"

As my host looked around the room, I answered her query as best I could, "My assumption is that we're back in the golden palace, purely judging by the appearance and decoration of the room. The magic that subdued you also worked on me, so I too have no recollection of what happened between being put to sleep and now."

Sliding out of the bed after getting a grasp of her surroundings, Mara again asked my opinion, "So what do we do now El? Do we wait for Thor and/or his mother to show their faces? OR do we wander about on an adventure?!"

Transitioning the pyjamas on Mara's body into a replica of Lady Sif's armour from the day before, and absorbing my head back into my host's body, I could tell that Mara's question was rhetorical, <Adventure it is.>

Lady Sif's armour, which I had replicated for my host, was silver and dark red. The base layer was a red leather dress that covered Mara's torso and ended in a multi-panelled mini skirt. Over the base layer sat silver armour plates that ended right above Mara's cleavage. Some of the materials I didn't recognise from the glances I had to go off, so I couldn't replicate them perfectly, but I used similar looking materials from Earth that I did have knowledge of as replacements. Mara's neck was 1 such area as it had straight collars that were made from an unknown fabric material, that I subsequently replaced with silk for comfort. On both of her hands were the same unknown fabric wrappings decorated with the same silver as the armour to create lightweight gauntlets. I forwent the silver bangles that Sif wore on her biceps, as they were unnecessary. Rounding out the outfit were black pants, under the dress, and brown knee-high boots decorated with silver metal which matched the armour on the rest of the outfit.

Admiring my craftsmanship, Mara commented, "Damn El, great work. We should blend in pretty well looking like this."

Not needing a reply from myself, Mara immediately set about opening the door to our room.

Fortunately, the door was unlocked which meant that we weren't being treated like a criminal or an enemy who was imprisoned.

Sticking her head out of the door, rather than asking me to do so, Mara looked left and right for any guards lingering around our room.

When she had confirmed that the coast was clear, she fully opened the door and stepped out into the palace's hallway, [Although I'm glad there's no guards watching over us, I'm also confused as to why there isn't any. I don't mean that guards would be stationed to prevent us from leaving, but I would have thought some would have been assigned to protect us considering we were incapacitated and unable to do so ourselves.]

As Mara closed the door behind her, the reason no guards were present became clear as the door vanished in a mint green mirage, <I suppose that explains why there are no guards. Having people guarding a blank wall would be bit suspicious, and if no-one can find us then there's need to deploy protection.>

Still slightly annoyed at the interruption we suffered the day before, Mara couldn't help mutter under her breath, "Fucking bullshit magic."

During the walk to Odin's bedchambers, that we experienced the day before, we realised that near enough all of the hallways in the area of the palace that we had walked through were identical.

As such, we assumed that such a design decision was applicable to the whole palace, rather than just limited to the higher floors which we initially entered due to Mjolnir's impact.

With no signs or directional clues on where anything was, Mara did a rhyme and changed the direction her finger was pointing with each word to determine whether she should head down the left or right of the hallway we were stood in, [ip dip dog shit, fucking bastard silly git, you are not it.]

Punctuating the last word of her odd rhyme, Mara pointed at the left hallway.

Nodding to herself, she clarified, [Right it is then.] And began walking down the right hallway.

While my host was making her way down the hallway, I inquired about the rhyme she just used, <Mar, what was the little song for?>

Looking around the hallway she was walking along, Mara answered, [Little song? Oh, you mean the rhyme. It's something from when I was a kid – before I basically locked myself inside and watched movies every day. When we used to play hide and seek or tag, or any other game where 1 person was singled out, we would use that rhyme to determine who was the seeker for hide and seek, and who was it for tag. That way there would be no arguments since it was chosen using the rhyme, which we classed as fair.]

Although what my host said was understandable, I immediately noticed a flaw in the system, <But since you change person with each word, surely could just work out which position would be last and avoid standing there, no?>

Giggling slightly, Mara replied, [Hehe nah. For starters we were like 7 or 8, so thinking that in-depth about it wasn't really something we considered. Secondly, the starting point wouldn't be the same every time. Some kids would start on the left, some on the right, and some would start with themselves, so predicting ahead of time would take a lot more effort. Finally, that wasn't the only rhyme we used and therefore the word count wasn't the same every time. The 1 I used was the most popular since it has swear words in and young kids love to use them if they can - just cause they think it's cool or funny.]

As Mara turned a corner, still looking around for any indication on where we were, I asked, <Did you and the others in orphanage come up with rhymes? Were other rhymes vastly different, or just a few words?>

Coming up to another T junction, Mara responded to me and used 1 of her examples to pick where to go on the junction, [The kids my age didn't think up any of the rhymes and kinda just inherited them from the older kids. Another popular 1 was, 'Ip dip dog shit, hairy fanny juicy tit, you are not it.' At the time we didn't really know what fanny or tit was, so we didn't find that 1 as funny. It was mainly the older kids who used that rhyme since they understood it, but always told us we'd get it when we were older instead of explaining it to us. The other popular 1 that we liked was because it was goofy and made no sense, rather than containing any cursing. We also used it when any adults were around since we would get told off if we cursed around them. It went, 'Eenie meenie miney mo, catch a fish by its toe, if it wriggles let it go, eenie meenie miney mo.']

While Mara resumed her walk, taking the right hallway as was chosen by her other 'ip dip' rhyme, I agreed with her statement that the last rhyme made no sense, <I see what you mean. Eenie meenie miney mo doesn't mean anything and a fish have toes. A rather odd selection of words presumably cobbled together for the simple fact that they rhyme are easy to remember.>

Walking past the first guard we had seen so far; Mara had a neutral expression on her face and made sure not to make eye contact with the woman to avoid any conversation.

As was always the case though, the strategy didn't work.

Once we had walked past the guard, the woman turned around and called out to Mara, "Where are you headed warrior? That direction is the barracks for the guards and is inaccessible to everyone except servants of the royal family."

Turning on her heels, Mara put on a friendly smile as she replied, "Oh is that where I was headed? My apologies, I was looking for the main hall and must have gotten lost."

Immediately recognising that she said something incorrect, due to the fact that the guard narrowed her eyes at my host, Mara internally informed me to be ready for a fight.

The guard, who was slightly taller than my host, walked up to her with narrowed eyes as they both stared into each other's pupils.

Surprisingly, the guard nodded her head slightly and slapped Mara's right shoulder, with her left hand, using considerable strength.

When Mara didn't so much as flinch when the action was in motion, or move when the impact hit her, the guard nodded again.

Un-narrowing her eyes, the guard shook her head slightly and commented, "You must be awful with directions to have missed the great hall, but considering the armour you're wearing, and the bearing you've shown, I have no doubt you're a warrior and not some unwanted guest. Follow me. I'm on my way down to the training facilities for the Einherjar - which is near the great hall."

Considering that our adventuring had been without direction the entire time, being forced to follow the guard to the training grounds did rob us of our freedom, but it also meant we didn't have to wander around the golden walled maze looking for anything interesting.

As such, Mara happily walked alongside the guard in order to head towards the training grounds mentioned.

------

Throughout the journey to the training grounds not much was said between Mara and the guard.

Mara had tried to ask for the woman's name and some other details about her to start a conversation, but all she received was the same reply, "It is unimportant."

The guard also didn't try to pry into any information about my host other than to ask the purpose for my host's visit, to which Mara answered, "I've been summoned by Thor and Lady Sif."

Mara's reply earned her another narrow-eyed look from the guard, but it was much shorter than the first time and was accompanied by an, "I see."

When the pair finally arrived at the open doors leading outside to the training grounds, the guard spoke to my host while pointing with her hand that wasn't holding the spear she carried, "If you head down that corridor, halfway down take a left and you should be able to see the giant doors of the great hall."

Nodding at the instructions, Mara promptly ignored them and attempted to walk out the open door into the training grounds.

Holding out her free arm to block my host, the guard questioned, "I said the great hall was that way, this is the training grounds and is closed for unauthorized personnel."

Ducking under the arm, Mara continued her attempted breach into the training grounds.

Realising that she was getting nowhere trying to reason with my host, the guard wielded the spear in her hands to block Mara.

This time, my host actually stopped instead of also ducking under the weapon.

Rather than turn back and head towards the great hall like directed, however, Mara turned to the guard, "I really appreciate you giving me directions, but now that I've seen the training grounds I wanna check them out before going to the great hall."

Shaking her head, the guard again informed my host, "I've already informed you that access is restricted, so unless you can prove to me that you have permission I'm afraid I can't let you enter."

Tilting her head slightly, Mara thought up a brilliant plan – her words, not mine.

When I realised what her plan was exactly, I couldn't help but comment, <Poor guard. She's going to have a heart attack.>

With her brilliant plan piecing itself together in her mind, she began to implement it by replying to the guard, "There's no need to be afraid, I haven't done anything scary, no? Besides, I do have permission. You never asked, so I didn't mention it, but my name is Mara Thorsdottir."

With visible confusion on her face when Mara started speaking, the guard nearly dropped her spear in shock once Mara told her who she, supposedly, was.

The act of the guard lowering her spear in shock wasn't lost on Mara, and gave her the perfect chance to step over said weapon as she resumed her walk outside - towards the training grounds.

Recovering faster than either of us expected, the guard caught up to my host as she exited the palace and got an unobstructed view of the training grounds.

As 1 may expect from a training grounds designed to maintain an army, the site itself was gigantic.

Not only was the initial sand courtyard outside huge, and rammed full of Einherjar guards and army personnel training, but just from the first glimpse it was apparent that the training grounds extended underneath the courtyard with various scenarios set up for training.

Under the courtyard itself there was a giant square pool that was most likely used for practicing combat while being hindered by water. There were walkways that looked similar to bridges that people were fighting on. Steps were being utilised to simulate various height advantages or fighting on an incline.

It appeared that most of the training was done with live weapons as well due to each swing of the blades, that we could see, glowing white and left grooves on whatever equipment they hit - except for other weapons or shields dyed in the same white glow.

Being cautious, considering who my host could potentially be, the guard inquired, "I apologize for blocking you with my weapon, but before you go further I must ask for proof of your identity. You must understand that this is a very serious matter."

Redirecting her focus away from the wonderous sight in front of her and back towards the guard, Mara asked, "How am I meant to prove it?"

Equally not sure about how Mara would prove her identity, the guard stated, "I apologize, but I am unsure about you would do so. However, until you do, I must ask that you leave the training ground."

Putting a hand under her chin in a thinking pose, Mara brought her fist down on her open palm, like she had just thought up a solution in that very moment - rather than it being part of her plan from the start.

Addressing the guard, Mara outstretched her arm to the side with her hand open as she queried, "Would this be enough?"

Staring at my host just holding her arm out, the confused guard asked, "Would what be enough?"

Humming to herself, Mara gave a cryptic reply, "Just give it a second, she takes a beat to get going. Anyyy moment now."

Just as the guard was about to ask Mara what was going on, the pair heard a muffled, but clearly distinct, bang sound.

With the training from the Einherjar ahead, the sound could have easily been assumed to be them. Except, the bang sound became noticeably rhythmic with every half second the bang being heard again and again, getting louder and louder.

Even some of the nearby Einherjar's stopped their training to look around for the cause of the crescendoing sound.

Roughly a dozen seconds after Mara first held out her hand, over half of the courtyard were looking at her and the guard in confusion due to the intensity of the banging noise.

With the loudest bang yet, almost like an explosion, Mjolnir burst from the golden palace walls and flew into Mara's outstretched hand.

Catching the shaft of the hammer with a firm grip, Mara twirled Mjolnir around and asked the guard, "Is this enough proof?"

Nodding her head, almost in reverence, the guard replied a bit louder than she probably intended, "Of course it is! I apologize if any of my actions thus far have been disrespectful towards you, Mara Thorsdottir!"

As a result of half the courtyard already looking in Mara's direction and watching her catch Mjolnir, the Einherjar were already whispering amongst themselves.

But when little miss guard said what she did, as loud as she did, the courtyard practically erupted into discussions.

Acting like she wasn't aware of the commotion she had created on the courtyard, Mara shrugged her shoulders and responded to the guard, "It's no problem. You didn't know who I was, and I won't hold anything against you. In fact, I would commend you for doing an excellent job. Keep up the good work."

Patting the guard on the shoulder, Mara walked past her and down the few steps that led onto the sandy courtyard.

As my host was walking, I couldn't help but sigh, <Haah, forget about the guard having a heart attack, I think Thor's gonna have an aneurism when he hears what you've done.>

Twirling Mjolnir around in her hand as she made her way to the centre of the training field, Mara responded, [You mean what we've done? You're an accomplice here El, we're 1 and the same. Besides, it's Thor's fault for letting his magical mumsy knock us out and not letting us remove a few limbs from the future headache. We can only hope he didn't escape, otherwise the battle of New York could still be on the cards and Coulson's life is therefore at significant risk. Am I being petty? Maybe. Is the fallout going to be fun? Abso-fucking-lutely.]

When we reached the centre of the courtyard, most eyes were on us as Mara questioned, "Does anyone want to help train me? I have a good physique but can't make full use of it due to my lacking upbringing and poor foundations."

Stepping forward was a bald man with identical tattoos on his head designed to look like black horns that followed the arch of his head and pointed towards his forehead. He had a brown goatee, brown eyes, warm, fair, white skin and had a stature of just over 6-foot. He was wearing the same combat training ensemble that all the other Einherjar's were, and had a single bastard sword in his hand.

Bowing slightly towards my host, the man introduced himself, "I am Skurge and it would be my honor to train alongside yourself, if you would permit me to do so, Thorsdottir."

Nodding towards the man known as Skurge, Mara happily accepted, "Of course Skurge. I am still relatively unfamiliar with armed combat, but I don't want you to go easy on me due to that fact. The enemy will not take my inexperience into account during battle, and it should be the same during training. Learning through failure and pain is the quickest way to improve as a warrior."

Raising his head from the slight bow he was in, Skurge echoed my host's sentiments, "Spoken like a true warrior! Clear some space for the spar!"

Almost like it was pre-rehearsed, all of the nearby Einherjar's cleared away to create a large square of space for the training spar between what they believed to be Thor's daughter and Skurge.