Chapter 59: YuChen’s Heart

Gu YuChen has always been aware that Su Ning's feelings for him were purely platonic but upon confirming it again during the phone call with Lin Miao, his chest inexplicably began to feel incredibly stuffy. 'Was it the urgency caused by the knowledge that Su Ning will begin to date in uni?' Gu YuChen wondered. Su Ning would be graduating M Academy in the next year and he needed to have her Engineering Scholarship ready by then. 

Undergraduate tuition in the UK which is capped at £9,250 a year is definitely more affordable for British residents while the cost for foreign students is almost triple. Of course this sum is pennies to the Gu Family but Su Ning is from a working class family so she will need the scholarship to study in the same uni as him.

Early on in his freshman year, Gu YuChen had already reached out to the university directors and administrators regarding the matter of funding a new scholarship opportunity for incoming foreign students. As the sponsors, Gu YuChen and Old Madam Gu opted to remain anonymous and only contended that they have an input on the candidate selection process. The agreement for this funding is for a period of 5 years whereby 3 applicants would be provided with a full scholarship (which includes tuition, room & board and sundry allowance) contingent on maintaining a certain GPA in each academic term. 

The paperwork is currently being finalized for the sponsorship and in a few weeks Gu YuChen intended to casually bring up the topic to Su Ning during one of their video calls. Perhaps to outsiders, his methods in keeping Su Ning close may seem too excessive. However, he didn't think so at all, for Gu YuChen the effort he took was already at a bare minimum. He wasn't even concerned about complaints of nepotism should others find out that he orchestrated the entire thing. In his mind, they should be thankful to Su Ning instead, because of her, others will be given the chance to attend such a prestigious university. 

However, it appears he underestimated the degree to which he will miss her during their two years separation. His longing for Su Ning grows more and more each day. Truthfully, the past year has been quite difficult for Gu YuChen personally. Though she seems unaware of it, Su Ning has been a pillar of emotional support for Gu YuChen in the last 7 years. Now that they were apart, he was still able to function as usual in public; however, in private he often felt lonely and despondent. 

Author's Note: Gu YuChen is two years older than Su Ning and would already be in his junior year when Su Ning attends uni as a freshman.

Su Ning had mentioned several times how she worried that his reclusive and reticent nature would hinder him from making friends and enjoying the 'ultimate university experience.' So, he purposely became acquainted with his classmates irrespective of their future business potential. Gu YuChen did so knowing Su Ning dislikes people who befriend others with ulterior motives. Admittedly, Gu YuChen has changed, the young master of the past wouldn't spare a second glance to anyone who wouldn't benefit his purpose. Truthfully, it's rather enjoyable to have these candid interactions with his contemporaries. Casually hanging out after a group project, going out for a bite, watching movies together and participating in a friendly football or cricket match, these were all firsts for him. 

However, despite being constantly surrounded by many, Gu YuChen still felt there's a hole in his heart. He wished that he was able to experience these firsts with Su Ning. It saddens him to be reminded that for Su Ning, he is only a temporary existence in her life. She has planned her future without him. 'Su Ning has always been that way. She can live perfectly fine without me. But the same isn't the case for me.' he thought wistfully. For Gu YuChen, Su Ning is the sun. 'After experiencing the warmth and the light of that sun, how can I bear to live without it?' Gu YuChen mused as he recalled a text that describes his feelings exactly.

Had I not seen the Sun

I could have borne the shade

But Light a newer Wilderness

My Wilderness has made—

Author's note: This short poem is titled 'Had I Not Seen the Sun' written by Emily Dickinson.

After Gu YuChen had finished the group project for his Criminal Law class, he had bid goodbye to his friends and declined their offer to grab dinner together. Instead, at 6pm on a Friday night, he was watching a recording of his favorite girl's musical, "The Little Mermaid." Under his orders, Xiao Yi had acquired a copy of the 4K recording from M Academy and promptly sent it to Gu YuChen as soon as it had been professionally edited to include footage shot at different angles. The quality is almost as good as some official music videos owing as well to the spectacular backgrounds and costumes worn by the cast. 

"My little NingNing is really beautiful." Gu YuChen whispered with a smile, his gaze fixed on the screen.

It was around 8pm by the time he had finished watching the musical. Seeing Lin JinYan's public display of affection during the final curtain call irked Gu YuChen tremendously. He had nearly crushed the water glass with his bare hands at the sight. 'This b*stard dares to take liberties while I am away. Tsk.' 

Still he did not forget to send his favorite girl texts of congratulations. 

[YuChen_Fox]: NingNing, I just finished watching your musical.

[YuChen_Fox]: You are wonderful as Princess Ariel.

[YuChen_Fox]: You know...this gege really likes your voice best.

[YuChen_Fox]: (≧ω≦)ゞ

[YuChen_Fox]: Also, remember to wash your cheeks well. 

[YuChen_Fox]: Lin JinYan's lips are dirty

[YuChen_Fox]: (ಠ ∩ಠ)

[YuChen_Fox]: Worried you may catch something. (¬､¬)

To Lin JinYan he sent the following text as warning.

[YuChen_Fox]: Lin JinYan…you little prick.

[YuChen_Fox]: What is going on in that head of yours?

[YuChen_Fox]: How can you think it's okay to take liberties with Su Ning?