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Just Focus On Me

Set in the late 1950s, Just Focus On Me is a poignant queer tale inspired by beloved titles such as Nana, Banana Fish, Heartstopper, The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo, and Fellow Travelers. Through the journals of Victoria Payne and Jane Myers, we follow their journey alongside their friends as they navigate the complexities of love and self-acceptance.
 Amid societal expectations and the weight of religious trauma, Victoria and Jane must confront their feelings for each other while grappling with the pressures of conformity. As they explore the true meaning of love, they learn to embrace their identities and support one another in a world that often feels hostile, discovering that that love is not just about romance; it's about friendship, acceptance, and the courage to be true to oneself.

clemminty · LGBT+
Not enough ratings
17 Chs

Chapter 12: A Step Into the Future

September 30th, 1956

Los Angeles, CA

Ugh! That Dante kid is sooo annoying!!! I was walking to my class and bumped into someone, dropping my books. Instead of helping me, he said, "Ugh... not you." It was Dante Williams, the kid from yesterday.

"Well, excuse me," I said, annoyed.

"Watch where you're going, girl..." he replied.

"How about you watch where you're making out with people?" I retorted back.

He rolled his eyes.

"Okay, dyke."

How did he know!?

"Who are you calling a dyke!?"

He smirked. "It's pretty obvious."

"....Is it actually?"

"No, I'm just messing with you. But it is pretty obvious you like that little church girl of yours. Good luck with that one, babe!"

Ugh... bastard!

"Jackass."

....

"Wait...is it really that obvious!? Do you think she knows!?"

"Girl...chill. I was just messing with you. But like, I can tell."

Oh thank god.

We stared at each other for a few seconds before we began to walk together.

"...So... how did things between you and Troy... you know, get... you know?"

He thought for a second.

"Well, he like just randomly came up to me one day and was like, 'Oh hahaha I like really like you... wanna be my boyfriend?' and I was like, 'Okayyy... I see you,' and yeah, the rest is history."

...What.

"What the hell."

He shrugged. "I mean, it's like really annoying when all the girls surround him all day and he's like kind of stupid but it's okay because I like him, I guess."

"Gross."

"Yeah, whatever." He rolled his eyes.

✦•······················•🪻•······················•✦

At lunch, Priscilla was happily chatting away with Troy, and Jane looked very... scared of him, to say the least? Dante I and walked towards them.

"Jane, dear, you look as pale as a ghost," I pointed out, with a straight face. She let out a loud yell when she saw Dante. I smirked at him and laughed.

He glared at me and rolled his eyes before he seemed to get an idea and smirked at me. "Screaming from just looking at a homo? Yeah, good luck with that one, babe. You'll be crying in a month at most...but I guess a month is equivalent to a year in lesbian time, no?" He whispered to me. I stomped on his foot.

"Ow!" I smirked as Troy rushed over to Dante. Ew... how mushy.

"Oh no! Are you okay???" he said. He looked like he had puppy dog eyes and a kissy face.

I'm going to kick him.

"Get away from me!" Dante said.

"But! I just wanted to see if you were okay!!!" Troy protested.

"I'm literally fine. I'm not gonna die from a dyke stepping on me." He rolled his eyes. Ugh...jerk. He needs to shut his loud mouth, I swear!

 Everyone but Jane looked at me with confused faces. Thanks a lot, Dante. Jane was too busy processing Troy and Dante's relationship to really pay attention to what Dante said.

He must have realized his slip-up and changed the topic.

"Is your little friend alright there?" He asked. Troy looked at her.

"She's been like this since I approached Priscilla!! I think she's scared of me!!!" he said, smiling the whole time.

"No, I think she's scared of your homosexuality," Dante retorted.

"Janeeeeee, you should stand up!!! Your legs will fall asleep!!!" Priscilla said cheerfully.

 I helped Jane up.

"Thank you..." she quietly said to me.

"You should get used to them, Jane!!! Troy and I are besties now!!!" Troy proudly nodded.

"We are!!!" They high-fived and laughed.

"Oh, how fitting," I said sarcastically.

"Double the headache..." Dante added on. Both Priscilla and Troy exclaimed, "Hey!!" Dante and I laughed.

"Well... you two seem to already be good friends!" Priscilla pouted.

Dante and I looked at each other before we began shouting insults at each other. Troy and Priscilla were taken aback but eventually began laughing... even Jane started to laugh a bit. I'm glad she was warming up.

✦•······················•🪻•······················•✦

The five of us hung out, argued, talked, etc., until lunch ended.

 After school, I was reading in the flower field like usual when Jane approached me and sat next to me.

"Hey, Tori... what does it even mean to be a homosexual?" I closed my book and looked at her, slightly confused.

"Someone who... is attracted to their own gender? Falls in love with their own gender I guess?" I said, confused why she was asking this. She pondered for a few seconds.

"...Then why is it such a big deal?" I think she should ask herself that.

"...I think I should be the one to ask you that, Jane dear." She looked embarrassed and guilty now.

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry! I didn't mean to offend... those... um... homosexuals..." I had to hold back my laugh.

"What? What??? Did I say something wrong again?" I shook my head and stopped myself from laughing.

"It's alright... they aren't offended by you. They're used to it." She looked slightly saddened.

"Oh...that's not a good thing... that must be terrible! And I've been a part of it! Oh, I'll apologize first thing tomorrow morning...! I don't think they're weird or gross or anything of the sort! I'm just...—"

"Not used to it?" I asked.

"Yes... not used to it. I'll try to be, though, I promise! Even if it might take time... oh, but not in a bad way!" I laughed.

"I'm sure they'll appreciate it, Jane." I smiled at her, and her eyes slightly widened and her cheeks flushed. She looked away.

"Tori... want to dance?" I looked slightly surprised, and my cheeks flushed.

"Dance? Oh, I don't know how to do that..." I said, shyly.

"It's alright... just focus on me, and you'll get the hang of it!" She smiled as she helped me up. She pulled me more into the flower field and took one of my hands, putting the other on my shoulder.

"Put your hand on my waist," she said. I was a bit embarrassed but agreed. And just like that, we began to dance. We were smiling and laughing through it all. It was fun when we spun each other around and when I dipped her and even when she dipped me.

After we had our fun, we sat back down in the field.

"I should get going now... Tom is coming over for dinner and he's already upset about me not having lunch with him recently. My parents will scold me if I'm late as well." I nodded and stood up to send her off. To my shock, she took my hands and kissed both of my cheeks.

"Come over to my house this weekend, won't you?" My whole face must've turned completely red. Without thinking much, I just muttered a "Y...yeah..." She smiled, hugged me, and ran off with a "I'll see you tomorrow!" and a wink????

Just after Jane left, Priscilla approached me from behind.

"Boo!" I screamed. Priscilla laughed.

"What's wrong with you, huh!?" I said, still annoyed.

"Hey, Tori..." She said, getting more serious.

"What do you want, Priscilla?"

"You...do... like Jane, right? Like romantically?" I looked away, slightly embarrassed and somewhat ashamed. Overall, I didn't care as much if people knew I was a lesbian anymore, but it still was somewhat scary when someone did find out. Especially if they asked me about it.

"You can tell?" I said, not wanting to give a direct "yes."

Priscilla smirked. "I mean, you always look at her like she's the most beautiful flower on earth!!!" She teased me.

"Oh, please." I rolled my eyes.

"Good for you, Tori..." She said, more sincerely now.

My eyes widened slightly, and a small genuine smile appeared on my face.

Good for me? Yeah... it was good for more... no matter how much I think I might hate it, I really don't hate it at all. No matter how long it took for me to come to terms with, well, me... now that I have, I can't imagine being any other way.

I smiled brightly. That was probably the first time Priscilla has seen me smile like this because she looked surprised but eventually matched my smile.

"Thank you, 'Cilla... you're a good friend." She laughed.

"I'm only speaking the truth, Tori." We both laughed, and it got quiet again.

"...Jane invited me to her house this weekend."

 Priscilla playfully nudged me and let out an "ooo."

"Oh, do tell me what happens~!! It's gonna be so rad!" She teased.

"Oh, shut up!" I said back. We both laughed again.

I'm happy... very happy. About having people like me; Troy and Dante, about Jane seemingly beginning to understand, about Priscilla being the best friend ever, about it all. I'm happy.