My meeting with Manager Kang

We came back to our dorm late that night because of the seoul traffic...We went in rooms and slept when there was a call... Half asleep i answered"yeoboseyo? igeos-i nugunji al su issseubnikka?( Hello? can i know who this is?) ....There was silence so i took a power nap when a familiar voice broke my sleep"sumin jigeum je samusil-eseo mannago sip-eoyo ...( Soomin i wish to see you in my office right now ...i have something important to discuss).. Manager Kang hung up... I woke up put on some makeup , changed from my pyjamas in my skirt and creeped to his office... i bashfully knocked on the door"deul-eogado doenayo?( Can i come in?) I didn't wait for any reply and rushed in."Ahhh .. soomin-i sigan-e je samusil-e jeonhwahaeseo jinsim-eulo sagwadeulibnida(Ahhh.. soomin accept my sincere apologies for calling you in my office at this hour) i nodded and signaled him to continue talking."bangtan sonyeondan, teughi jeong-guggwaneun aju joh-eun gwangyein geos gat-ayo(You seem to have a very good relationship with BTS and specially jungkook) i nodded..."dangsin-eun geulub-eseo gajang ingiissneun membeolaneun geos-eul algo iss-eumyeo, yeoleobundeul-i debwi han ji eolmadoeji anh-assseubnida.(you do know that you are the most sought after member in the group and it's just little time since you guys have debuted) So this damn man woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me my achievements?"deul-eo bwa ... neowa jeong-gug-i ujeong geu isang-eul gong-yuhago issdaneun geol al-a, nan gwaenchanh-a ...hajiman(Listen...i know that you and jungkook share something more than just friendship and I'm totally fine with it...But)he paused."naneun dangsin-ui maenijeoloseo eotteon jonglyuui gwangye munjedo yongnabhaji anh-eul geos-ibnida ... dangsin-eun hangsang midieoui nun-e issgo dangsin-ui kkum ap-eseo gwangyega geoui gachiga eobsdago saeng-gaghabnikka?(I as your manager will not tolerate with any kind of relationship concerns...you know that you're always in the eye of the media and i think relationship is of little value in front of your dreams?) he paused again...This time my head raised alarmingly as to what he said ached in my head.."ihae hasijyo? geulaeseo! ulineun dangsin-i nuguwado jeonmunjeog-in gwangyeleul gajil su eobsdaneun gyeollon-e dodalhaessseubnida.(You understand right? So! we come to a conclusion that you can have a relationship no more than professional with anybody...not even jungkook because we dont know how the public might react) he paused yet another time.. " I stood up from my chair and tried arguing with him that I'd somehow manage , that i wont let anyone know about it, would never show it in public but he didn't agree."i hoesa-e ibsahagi jeon-e gyeyag-eulhaessgo eomgyeoghage jikyeoya hal gyuchig jung hanaga gwangye yeossdaneun geos-eul gieoghabnida.(You remember that you had signed an agreement before joining this company and one of the rules strictly followed was relationship...You weren't allowed to have any sort heart relations with anyone) i begged him not to do this to me but he wasn't ready ...."sumin ihaehago ttaleul geola mid-eoi geulub-eseo ypuleul gyochehaeya halkkabwa(Soomin i believe that you will understand and follow it otherwise I'm afraid i might have to replace ypu from this group) he threatened... I froze ...if i chose jungkook what was the assurity that he'd do the same after all he's also tied to some sort of contract...and i suffered all these days to let my dreams go to waste? no , Love can happen sometime later but my dreams wont wait..I was in tears, broken but i mumbled"ne, gang maenijeo nim ihaehabnida. jangdamhabnida. jega geuwaui jeonmunjeog-in gwangye isang-eul jumoghal geos-ilago midseubnida(Yes, manager Kang ..i understand and i assure you.. believe me that i will have noting more than a professional relationship with him) he gave me a nod ."jeongmal gamsahabnida .. ije dangsin-eun tteonal su issseubnida(Thank you so much ..now you may leave) i frowned back as i left his office...I couldn't sleep the whole night... Tears couldn't stop themselves from running down... I woke up early the next Morning and kept dancing and dancing and dancing...When my eonnis woke up seeing me not in my usual place came to see me dancing in the practice room...i kept dancing dancing for like 3 hours continuously..."Babypink stop you have been dancing for so long" Claire eonni came running to me . i didn't stop...Sugar eonni sensed some trouble she came running and hugged me tightly... i still didn't stop i kept kicking her her to let me go but she wouldn't .... Finally my anger broke and fresh tears rolled down . i hugged her very tightly... All of them came rushing to me and concerned asked" Gwenchan-a? eotteohge doen geoyeyo?( you alright? what happened?) but i couldn't answer and they knew what the reason was and what all of them had feared would happen someday or the other... Sometimes not achieving something in your life is better than living a life full of sacrifices....Like the one i have ... i cried the whole day ,and almost isolated myself but my eonnis have never left me and will never leave me to suffer alone... They're always behind me like a bar...I had over 75 missed calls , over 250 messages and voice messages from jungkook that I didn't answer....i ignored him ...Im sorry jungkook but i have to do this ... i know imma hell selfish and you might think i used you but when you'll know the reason im damn Sure you'll understand too....For now let me cover up my tears so that not even you can see it...Can you?