Chapter 7

While gazing up at the blue sky, two girls were at the top of my mind. One of them is the girl I've always been together with, and the other is one I recently got acquainted with. I'm not a hero who goes around saving girls. I can't appear in their time of need as a knight in shining armor to save them from their predicament. So if being cool and calm doesn't work, then I just have to be an idiot and force those two to smile.

"Aki! I brought what you asked me for! We're doing that, right?!"

Classes had ended for the day. And right on cue, Kazama came to my desk carrying a large sports bag, despite not being part of any sports club.

"Thanks a bunch…But, where did you even keep this? I don't remember you carrying this around today."

"I placed it in the occult club's clubroom when I came to school this morning. Sure caught me by surprise, asking to bring these babies with me."

"I remembered you saying that you bought these back in middle school. I had some at my own place, but nearly not enough."

"Sooo…I was helpful this time, right? In other words, this would be the perfect time for you to praise me!"

Damn, he's as noisy as always. But since he actually did well today.

"You're right. I don't mind praising you…"

"Huh?"

"Assuming you can win against me, that is," I said and pulled the trigger of the object in my hand.

Immediately after, a stream came shooting out of the muzzle—consisting of water.

"Mgh?! What was that for, Aki?! Surprise attacks don't count! You can't just shoot me with my holy rife!"

"Your smug face was just getting on my nerves. Also, this isn't a holy rifle, it's a water gun!"

That's right, I asked Kazama to bring some water guns with him.

"Hah! So you're declaring war on me?! Fine, I'll use my protective spirit power to strike you down!" He grinned and fired off his own water gun.

However, it was a bit different from mine. What he held was something akin to a water machine gun. It was a lot bigger and could fit a greater volume of water, giving him the advantage:

"Now hold on. That's not fair! Also, first, you have the devil's powers, then you're shooting holy water, and now you have protective spirit power…What do you even believe in?!"

"It's totally fair! It's my power, after all. Also, I'm friends with both devils and spirits, so…Here I come! Holy water attack!"

"Wah?!"

He fired off his water machine gun. And paired with the severe pressure, he could even fire off several shots after another. I managed to evade one, but my seat ended up completely drenched. Our classmates were already causing a ruckus, too.

"How's this?! Want some of my power?!"

"That's not your power, it's the water machine gun!"

"Aki-Kun, Kazama-kun, what are you up to?"

Ayaka had returned after she previously left the room to talk to Yumiko.

"Ah, perfect timing. You come join us, Ayaka."

"H-Huh?"

I turned toward Ayaka, throwing my water gun at her. She seemed flustered for a moment, but somehow managed to catch it. Then I grabbed a new one from the bag Kazama brought…Holy smokes, he had this many?! And they were already filled with water, too. That must have been heavy as all hell. I thanked Kazama only in my mind, as I grinned confidently.

"Listen well. For the next thirty minutes, we're gonna shoot at each other, and the one who's the least wet by the end is the winner. We're allowed to move everywhere in this school, but if you get caught by a teacher…then you're immediately disqualified. Aaand…go!" I moved my water gun and pointed it at Ayaka.

However, through spending all this time together, she apparently could read my movement quite too easily, as she evaded the shot with a smirk, saying "I figured you'd do that!"

"That's a bit sudden, but I'm game! I can tell what you're thinning, Aki-Kun!"

"Hmph, I wonder how long you can be so confident? The game has already started."

"Understood! All right, time to get fired up and win this thing, indeed!"

"What roleplay is this now? You talk like a weirdo."

Look at her being this excited. Well, she easily gets fired up for these things, always participating in nonsense like this.

"I'm joining in, you two! Eat this!"

"Whoa?!"

Following that was merciless water machine gun fire. Watching our battle begin, our classmates now cheered like they were watching a sports event. That being said, Kazama's water machine gun is way too strong. I figured it'd be better to wait for an attack when he's out of water, so I escaped from the classroom. I looked for a place to hide, when I ran down the stairs, looking for another possible participant. Luckily, I found just the perfect individual.

"Yumiko! Great timing!"

The girl's beautiful blonde hair swayed as she turned around. I ran down the stairs to where she had just passed.

"Oh my, Yamada -kun. Were you looking for me?"

"Yeah. Let's have some time together," I said and threw the water gun at her.

She panicked a moment but somehow managed to catch it. At the same time, Kazama appeared from the top of the stairs.

"Found you, Aki…You better be rea—Wait, you're inviting Yumiko-san?! No way! I can't shoot her! I don't have the courage to do that!"

"Like hell I care about that. If you're not gonna shoot, you'll get shot. This whole school is a battlefield."

"Dawww, that Akinded so cool! I wanted to say that! But then again, I kinda wanna see Yumiko-san get all drenched!"

"I'm impressed you have the guts to say that in front of her…"

Pretty sure that requires greater courage than shooting her with a water gun. Being subconsciously evil like that just Akinds even nastier.

"…Hm, I see. I'm not entirely sure what's going on here, but I'm down." Yumiko had finished listening to our conversation, as she ran her hand through her hair, smiling. "Basically, I just have to beat you up completely?"

Not expecting Yumiko to approach him, Kazama got splashed right in the face by a large shot, as he groaned.

"Hmph! I can't sit still when there's a devil user this close by! Eat this! Holy water!"

Seriously, spirit power or devil user, can you pick one? I mean, he's using holy water against the devil, so he's…not technically…wrong…? Anyway, he fired off his water machine gun. However, Yumiko faintly moved her body, like she was dancing almost, to evade the incoming attack. And while doing so, she fired off her own water gun twice. Both of those beautifully hit Kazama.

"Holy smokes! How are you so good?!"

Then again, dealing with such a perfect beauty like her, I should have expected this outcome. And as our battle continued to escalate, we got more and more attention from the other students.

"What's going on? What are they doing?"

"It's Kazamafrom class 4. The famous weirdo, he's up to something."

Funnily enough, Kazama was being treated as a weirdo even by people from other classes. However, he didn't bother much with their bothered expressions, as he used the water guns inside the sports bag hanging from his shoulder to fire off endless amounts of water mercilessly.

"Hehehe! If you wanna join in, then be my guest! I've got all these weapons here! And right now, I'm the history's strongest devil user and dealer of forbidden arms!"

He kept blabbering about confusing stuff while striking a cringe pose, which led the people around us to mutter among themselves even further. However, when I paid attention to it, I realized that more people were being interested in it rather than simply shunning Kazama.

"I don't really get what's going on, but this looks fun."

"That weirdo Kusama's involved, right? You should stay away from that."

"I mean…it doesn't seem too bad. And it feels like…it's youth."

"What are you on about?"

"I don't like Kazamabeing involved, but…Yumiko-san's participating, so…"

"I wanna try it, too! Especially since it's so hot today!"

Thus, all the people wishing to participate grabbed water guns from Kazama's repertoire.

"Aki, we're running low!"

Since more people than expected wanted to participate, we quickly ran out of water guns. That's why I breathed in and then declared in a loud voice.

"Everyone's free to participate in this battle! You come at us as you like! Since we're out of water guns, you can grab water bottles or buckets! However, no violence! And now throwing things at other people!"

I'm not a weirdo like Kazama, so standing out like this is honestly more embarrassing than anything. However, I have to do it. Better this way than doing something half-baked and regretting it later. In these cases, it's much more convenient to just be another idiot in the system. The students all around me seemed to agree, as they raised their fists into the air, reading their water guns. Others grabbed water bottles with water. Since this school is fairly communal, they're all up for fooling around like this. Then again, Yumiko the school idol participating must be a huge part, too. If it was just Kazama and me, we probably would have gotten ignored.

"Hahaha! You normal folks can group up as much as you want, you can't beat me!" Kazama still had water left in his gun and fired it at his surroundings.

"Waaah!"

"Eeeek?!"

I could hear screams, colored in laughter and joy.

"That's no fair!"

"Everyone! Let's gang up on him!"

"Haha! You won't defeat me this easily! I will show you how the occult club handles things, and create a legend for myself!"

Everyone began targeting Kazama simultaneously, as Yumiko turned around and ran away.

"Yumiko? You not gonna join in?"

"Of course. However, I need to replenish my ammunition."

"Ah, you need water."

"Indeed. But once I'm recharged, we can continue our battle…"

"You're brimming with excitement, eh? Akinds good, I'll face you head-on!"

"Hehe…When we next meet, we'll be enemies. And I will be the one to pierce your heart."

"You're getting a bit too excited, no?!" I screamed in terror as I watched her run off.

"Hello there…!"

"Hey now, I won't make it that easy for you."

We both replenished our water and stood face-to-face in the hallway. We're heavily limited on ammunition here. Once one person is out, they'll be done for. So, while facing each other, we carefully shot at each other and evaded the incoming water. Right now, only our shoulders and legs were wet, but we didn't suffer any severe injuries.

"…"

Yumiko pulled the trigger, but she was out of water. Probably used up too much.

"Outta ammunition, eh? Wanna surrender?"

"Oh, please…You're so naive, Yamada -kun."

"?!"

Yumiko showed a confident smirk, as she moved her hand to faintly lift up her skirt. Through this, she revealed her thighs, but what was further above thankfully stayed hidden. And on her white thigh, I could see a water bottle tied to through the usage of a thread. Normally, that would stick out quite a bit, but because she kept it on the back of her thigh, I couldn't see it until now.

"…I mean, I understand the need for more ammunition during battle, but did you really have to place it there?"

Her waist or inside her bag would have been more than enough.

"But keeping ammunition on your garter belt is perfectly normal, right? At least that's how they do in the movies, so I wanted to replicate that."

"Right…"

"It's always the same. Watching an action movie? You get weapons stuck to a garter belt. A deadly disease? Someone's writing a will. Isekai reincarnation? Cheats. It is the way things work."

"I get the action and disease thing…but you're even knowledgeable when it comes to isekai reincarnation?! You're a bigger nerd than I thought!"

"I am a specialist when it comes to isekai reincarnation," Yumiko showed a confident smirk as she filled up her water gun.

In the meantime, I stood still and let her do exactly that. After all, the hero is currently undergoing his transformation scene, so it'd be against the law for me to attack her. I'd just be a party pooper if I used this opening, and it's also a way for me to repay her for the delicious sight of her thighs.

"Now, Yamada -kun…I guess this would be the time for the shocking turnaround?" Yumiko finished refilling her water gun as she showed a devilish grin and pointed the muzzle at me.

"!"

And right at that moment, I spotted Ayaka creeping up to Yumiko behind her back. She was probably either fighting Kazama up to this point, or maybe even another student, as she didn't catch on to us yet, holding the water gun while looking around. However, she eventually saw us and attempted to run away. It's almost like she was saying that she wanted to give us some alone time together.

"Hey, Ayaka!"

However, I wouldn't let her, calling her name.

"You help me! We'll fight Yumiko together."

"Huh? But…"

"No, no, no. You're going to fight with me, right? We'll get you all drenched, Yamada -kun."

"No, no, no. She'll side with me. And then you'll be crying for more ammunition for my water gun!"

"I…I…"

Ayaka narrowed her eyes with a worried gaze, looking between the two of us. What's that face about? Hey, this isn't like you. You should have more fun. Go wild and crazy, as you laugh to your heart's content. That's what we're all about, right?

"Hey, Ayaka!"

"Shinomiya-san!"

Yumiko and I spoke up at the same time and smiled.

"Let's play!"

"Let's play together!"

We stopped in our tracks, turning towards Ayaka, who wanted to run away. And then, we offered our hands to her.

"…!"

For a split second, she looked like she was on the verge of breaking out in tears. But she then formed a fist in front of her chest, and looked down once. When she looked up again—she smiled.

"I…I won't side with either of you! After all, I am…" She struck a cool pose to the point I could see a Akind effect popping up behind her like in a manga. "I am equality! I am an advocate of peace! The super hero of justice!"

"Ah, Anpan Man's back."

"It definitely is Anpan Man."

"How many more times do we have to repeat this same joke?!"

"It's because you called yourself a superhero."

"Th-That's true, but I don't have Anpans with me right now! I have a water gun, so I'm Water Gun Man!"

"That's so hard to say. I'll just stick with Anpan Man."

"I was denied right away?! A-Anyway, a hero of justice will take even fooling around like this seriously! I'll go all out! That's why, no holding back, Aki-Kun, Yumiko-san!" She instantly ran toward us, as Yumiko readied herself.

"Eat this…!"

"Hee hee, it won't be that easy for you…"

"Anpan Beaaam!!"

"?!"

Seeing Ayaka scream that with a serious face, Yumiko burst out laughing. Unable to bear with it, she held her stomach as she continued to writhe in laughter and agony, as Ayaka's shot of water hit her right in the face.

"I did it! I defeated Suziya!"

"W-Wait…That was…against the rules!" Her face was beet red as she continued to laugh endlessly.

"Now it's your turn, Aki-Kun!"

"Yeah. Come at me, Ayaka."

I dodged the Anpan Beam, firing a stream of water at her. Unable to evade that, the collar of her uniform ended up drenched as she shrieked.

"Heh. You're ten years too early to think you can beat me."

"Y-You only grazed my upper uniform! This is where the real battle starts!"

We pointed our water guns at each other, taking positions. Right after, we heard footsteps approaching us. They must have been running from another fight because they were girls completely wet.

"Dawww, my uniform is drenched!"

"But that was pretty fun, right?"

"Wait…that's Yumiko-san! Isn't she laughing like crazy?"

"For real?! I thought she was immune to all jokes…"

"But this is nice. I think she looks cute…and a lot easier to approach like this."

The person in question finally got control of her laughter, as she fixed her hair. But she ignored the girls and spoke to Ayaka.

"…Hehe, Shinomiya-san, you're struggling against Yamada -san, I see. How about we team up and show him who's the real boss here?"

Why's she Akinding like a comic villain now? Well, she probably just said that because she thought it Akinded cool.

"What's this? You teaming up now? I thought Anpan Man was supposed to not pick sides?"

"Yes, normally. However, she's not teaming up with me…I'm teaming up with her!"

"H-Hold on! That makes it Akind like I'm the evil one!"

"Heh…Fine then. I'll beat you both at the same time."

"That's right. We're both this drenched already…so we'll have you take responsibility."

"Hold on, could you not phrase your words that badly?! Was that accidental?!"

That…is a bit too stimulating if you ask me. In fact, their uniforms were wet to the point they started turning transparent.

"Phew…A-Anyway!" I sighed once to calm down my racing heart and declared.

I raised my eyebrows, looking straight ahead. Even if we're just fooling around…I'm gonna take this seriously.

"Let's finish this."

"Yup!"

"Yes."

As more onlookers gathered around us, we all had our fingers on the triggers, when—My sight was filled with smoke.

"Bugh?! Wh-What the hell is this?!"

The smoke emitted from an oddball that landed between us. Our surroundings quickly turned white, like this was some sort of poisonous gas…Wait, this feels familiar. It's the same thing that got Kazama scolded by our teacher. According to him, it's the greatest possible exorcism tool. But in the eyes of any normal person, it was just a smoke bomb. And after the smoke cleared, the evil mind appeared.

"Yoho, Aki! When the protagonist's in a pinch, it's time for the friend character to play his part! I came to help you, so praise me! Praise me, please!"

"You're so god damn annoying! You just got in my way!"

"Whaaat?! How would I be getting in the way?!"

"Your entire existence is a bother! Shut up! Also, how are you this drenched?! You got completely messed up in the few minutes I didn't watch you!"

"Awww! I'm not wet! In fact, I messed them all up! Because I am the overpowered black magic genius who can control water and droplets!"

"Just shut up! Also, your settings are completely messed up! You called yourself a devil user! Whatever, I'm just gonna beat you up, too!"

Sparks flew between all of us, but then—

"You guuuys agaaain?!"

…However, our homeroom teacher's roars of anger completely halted our battle.

"I've got a mountain load to tell you, but for starters…Change into your jerseys! Can't have you all catch a cold! It might be damn hot outside, but with how drenched you are…Just to make sure, okay?! The lecture comes after. I'm gonna wring you guys out, so better be ready!"

Yet again, it was evident he had kind intentions deep down, but our homeroom teacher was tasked to clean up after Kazama's mess (yet again). I don't blame him for blowing a fuse each and every single time. We listened to his orders, returned to the classroom, and changed into our P.E. jerseys. Luckily, our homeroom teacher said "I bet Kazamaand Yamada are the main perpetrators again, and you other guys got wrapped in this mess, so I'll be mainly lecturing those two! You other guys, go home! And straight, so you won't catch a cold!" Great judgment, teach!

Thus, Ayaka, Yumiko, Kazama, and I headed back to our classroom. Then again, Yumiko's class was different, so she only walked halfway down the hallway. And even though we were absolutely drenched, we couldn't stop laughing.

"Hahaha! That was so much fun, Aki-Kun!"

"Yeah."

"We haven't played with water guns for years. But you really surprised me. Why today of all days?"

Despite being scolded by our teacher not even a few moments ago, Ayaka was still above the clouds, acting like a cat on catnip.

"No particular reason. It's just…"

"Yeah?"

"You like this sort of stuff, right?"

Doing random stuff like this, creating noise and chaos. It's what both Ayaka and I are used to.

"…Yeah. I love it," she said, half in a daze.

She's finally showing me her usual, drowsy smile. That's what I've been waiting for. That's the kind of smile you're supposed to have.

"This sure takes me back. We'd always do idiotic stuff like this!"

"H-Hey now, Ayaka-chan! Calling us idiots might be taking a bit too far, don't you think? I'm not an idiot, I'm a genius black magic user!"

"Huh? Ah, wait, no! I wasn't making fun of you…I was saying it in a good way! A good meaning!"

"Ah, a good way? That's whatevs, then!"

"You're really satisfied with that explanation?!"

"B-But Aki-Kun, you said it before, too! 'Humans are all idiots, so might as well be a straightforward idiot. Makes life easier,' is what you told me!"

"Never have I ever uttered that in my life! You're just making nonsense up as you go!"

Hearing our banter, Yumiko let out a snicker. And then, the other people around us called out to her.

"Ah, Yumiko-san! That water battle just now was fun! Let's play again!"

Seeing the girls smile at her, Yumiko was bewildered for a moment.

"…Y-Yes," she answered awkwardly, bewildered, but most importantly—Happily. "That's a promise! Make sure to invite me next time!" She waved her hands at the girls and said her goodbyes, as I could see her grinning.

She's on cloud seven, just like Ayaka.

"Yamada -kun."

As Ayaka and Kazama were busy talking, Yumiko pulled on the sleeve of my shirt, calling out to me.

"…Thanks."

"Hey now, I'm being thanked after getting you absolutely drenched? Where'd the queen I thought I knew gone off to?"

"Don't poke fun at me now." She pulled on my ear with a pout, whispering. "You wanted me to indulge in this…'Stupid fun,' right?"

"What does that even mean? I didn't do a damn thing. It's because you ran around like a sniper with that water gun that everybody else said 'Holy smokes, Yumiko's not some cool beauty at all. She's really funny,' and that's about it."

"I don't quite like how you had to phrase that, but leaving that aside…" She snickered and looked at me with a gentle smile. "You really…are a pleasant person."

"Not really."

"Huh?"

"I just wanted to cause a fun ruckus. Just going all out right before summer break…With my important new friend."

"Wait, so…"

Honestly, that line Akinded so cheesy, I had to look away if I wanted to keep a straight face while delivering it.

"W-Well, and also…Ayaka's smiling, too."

"…That's true. And I truly love her smile."

Ayaka and Kazama were walking a bit ahead of us, discussing what 'idiotic' even means. Watching them, I muttered, almost like I wasn't myself.

"…This only lasts for a moment, and I might just be getting on too high of a horse, but…"

It's embarrassing to say. And to ensure that the person in question didn't hear it, I whispered to Yumiko.

"Even so…Even if it's just one moment…one second…I want her to smile as much as possible."

I don't need to fake nonsense. I don't care if I'm looking lame. I can't be a hero who cheers up people wherever I go, so the best I can do is cause a ruckus to allow everyone to be themselves, and let them burst out laughing. It might not be much, but I want to ease the pain she seems to be feeling right now. If it's a problem that'll be resolved in time, then I'll give her that. And make her feel at peace while she goes through it.

And while telling Yumiko about this, we already reached our classroom, which meant that we'd had to split off from Yumiko. But right before that, I could hear a faint mumble coming from her.

"…You really are kind."

"Yumiko?"

"Hee hee…It's nothing. However…"

Her hair was still wet, the drops of water looking like small pearls, as she entered the classroom, whispering quietly.

"I have to say…I'm a bit jealous of the person who gets to be next to you."