Lui's past (shenaniganery)

Lui:has anyone told you that thy loved you?

Artie:do my parents count?

Lui:sure!

Artie:then no

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Lui:i don't know how to tell you this Tammy,but you're in love with me

Tammy:what?

Tammy:I'm no- you know what i am...oh my alicane...

Artie:what kind of confession did i just witness...

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Somali:' wow!Lui looks so calm and composed how does he do it!?'

Lui:'shit fuvk fuck shit fuck oh my alicane fuvk shit oh dear help me oh alicane.'

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Tammy struggling to walk right in one inch heals:why's this so hard?!

Lui walking perfectly and doing parkour in six inch heals:weak!

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Tammy:where's Lui?

Somali:doing stuff

Tammy:i don't like the sound of that,where's Matthew?

Somali:trying to stop Lui from doing stuff...

Tammy: and where's Artie?

Somali:trying to stop matthew from stopping Lui from doing stuff

Tammy:i see...and what are you doing here

Somali:I'm supposed to stop you from stopping Artie from stopping matthew from stopping Lui from doing stuff

Tammy:...*face palm*

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Oswald:you deserve a award from putting up with me

Lui: you're my award

Later...

Nanasaki: you deserve a award from putting up with me

Lui:damn right i do!  you're such a bitch sometimes

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Lui:Here's a fun idea for chrismas!

Tammy:that's a a lot months away dude...

Lui:so,we hang a mistletoe but instead of kissing when we get under it, we fight each other

Somali: Lui!

Tammy:i don't think that's a good idea and what would it even be called?

Artie:mistlefoe!

Somali:don't encourage him!

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Artie:i think people like Lui should get robbed twice a week!

Lui,holding somali's dead corpse as he cry's:why?

Artie:cause i don't like you

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Kai:somali you do know Lui will never agree to do something like that.

Somali: yes he will

Kai:I've already asked three times!

Somali: let me try* walk somewhere to Lui*would you?-

Lui:of course!

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Artie: how come you guys aren't scared right now?

Somali,Matthew, Lydia,ruth look at each other nod and respond: compared to Lui's sadistic tendencies and the training he gives us this is way too easy

Artie:what the fuck...

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Somali:he's Lui what could he possibly be protecting?

Everyone else:* stop doing what they were doing and look at him with a dead pan face*

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Kai: somali's hot

Lui: back off

Kai:.... No as in,he's sick...

Lui:...*Runs back home to take care of him*...

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Lui: I have the sharpest memory name one thing I forgotten

Artie:you left me in the Walmart parking lot 3 days ago

Lui:that was on purpose try harder

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Lui: Artie, can I take you to my therapist?she thinks I'm making you up

Artie: who dare think I'm not real!?* they going to the car and drive off*

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Lui, setting down a card: ace of diamonds

Artie, pulling out in a card: plus four

Tammy pulling out of Pokémon card :Jolteon I choose you

Somali, trembling:what are we playing..?!

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Lui: I'm here as Matthew's emergency contact

Doctor: so you're here to pick him up?

Lui: I'm here to remove myself as his emergency contact

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Lui: hello people who do not live here .

Matthew:hi

Ruth:sup

Lydia:hello

Artie: yo

Tammy:yello

Oswald:I didn't come here by choice

Nanasaki:I force him! Oh and we used the keys,sorry!

Lui:you used the keys those were for an emergency only?!

_____

Artie:i could kill you if i really wanted to...

Lui: so could anyone else. so could a dog .so could a very dedicated duck. you're not special.

Artie:... dude

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Liam:*trips*

Oswald:are you sure you want him

Lui:mhm

Nanasaki:we could get you one Better

Lui:oh, no he's perfect!...

'just like how somali was...'...

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Lui:are you-!

Artie:Fucking

Lui:Kidding me?!

Tammy:...what was that?

Artie:somali banned lui from swearing so I volunteered to help him out!

Tammy: you just wanted to have an excuse to swear more didn't you?

Artie: so? I'm helping him in something, like you said so

Tammy:this wasn't what I meant

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Lui:i love this picture of the old times with my friends

Somali:why is it the version without Artie?

Lui:i didn't have him challenging me all the time back then,that's why we were so Happy.

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Lui:I've never been in a snowball fight before,i don't know the rules.

Artie:what?

Lui:is there like a point system or is it like,to the death?

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Ruth:hey Lui!what's up?

Lui:hey Ruth!did you,Lydia and matthew give blankets to the rival factions to keep them warm like i asked?

Ruth:...what?

Lui:i told you to get Lydia and matthew to make them warm

Ruth:make...a war

Lui:warm

Ruth:war?

Lui:oh dear...warm!

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Lui:that's it!your all grounded!

Somali no flowers for you,

Matthew no explosives for you,

Ruth no fighting for you,

Lydia no water parks for you, Tammy no fangirling for you,

Nanasaki no fan art for you,

Oswald no costumes for you

And Artie,oh alicane is there anything is there anything you love?

Artie: vengeance

Lui:no vengeance for you

Artie:i was going to say I'll get you for this but i guess that's off the table

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Nanasaki: so hipotheticly if Lilith went insane and went off murdering and burning people and there houses,how would you stop her?

Lui:...I'm on my way

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Tammy: I like the whole you good guy and bad guy dynamic you two have

Lui: it isn't a dynamic im just mean and somali isn't

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Matthew:why isn't it smirking at me?

Somali:it isn't smirking at anybody

Matthew: oh yeah the three rival faction heads saw it, explain that!

Somali:*points at Lui* sleep deprivation *points at Tammy* paranoia *points at Artie* delusional personality disorder

Matthew:...fair enough.

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Somali:you guys realize that arson is a crime right?

Matthew:please show us a law that says that

Lydia:*pulls up the law*

Lui:...yeah, we're not reading that

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Lui:*laying on the floor*i miss somali

Lydia:It's been five minutes

Lui:I miss him

,

Lydia:he went to the store

Lui:i miss him though

Somali:hey I'm back guys

Lui: don't you ever leave again those were the longest five minutes of my life!

In another universe

Artie:i miss Lui

Tammy:he's been gone for five minutes

Artie:i miss Lui

Tammy:he just went to the fucking store

Artie:*on the virge of crying* but i miss Lui!

Lui:I'm back!~

Artie:fuck you Lui,i didn't even notice you Left!

Lui:lol

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Lui:do you know how I actually hurt my foot?

Artie:yeah?

Lui:i was dancing

Artie:wait really?

Lui:i learned,canga,tango, ballet, cumbia,and different mexican dances

Artie:and why are you telling me all of this?

Lui:*smirks*because no one will ever believe you.everyone thinks i hate dancing after all.

Artie:you sick sick son of a bitch

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Tammy: how did you not hear what I said?

Somali: ive been zoned out for the last two and a half hours

Matthew: I got distracted about halfway through

Artie and Lui exchange a look and nod : ignoring you was a conscious decision

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Somali: if you have to stab him?

Lui: I had to

Somali:why?

Lui: he said 'what are you going to do, stab me?'

Somali: fair enough

Artie:*from the distance*I didn't think he'd actually do it!

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Lui:okay if they ask who we are,you say I'm the leader, somali is my second in command,Ruth is our combat strength, Lydia is our intelligence and Matthew is our canary

Matthew:Canary!?

Lui:as in we send you in first and if you die we know it's dangerous

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Artie: why did you give Lui a KNIFE!

Tammy: he felt unsafe

Artie: now i feel unsafe

Tammy:... Would you like a knife?

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Lui:Artie,I'm not mad

Tammy:oh no...

Artie tearing up:don't you fucking say it...

Lui:I'm just disappointed

Artie sobbing leaves to disarm the nuke

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Oswald:why are Lui and somali sitting with their backs against each other?

Nanasaki:that had a fight

Oswald:then why are they holding hands?

Nanasaki:Lui gets depressing and somali gets sad when they fight

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Somali: whoops

Lui:'whoops' this is not a 'whoops' situation!.we are far past 'whoops'.' whoops ' is a distant speck in the review mirror.you are solidly in the 'oh fuck' territory and i expect you to act like it!

Time skip

Lui:I'm so disappointed in all of you, I'm at loss for words

Matthew: 'dispite being at loss for words he yelled at is for two hours and a half'

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Oswald:I'm having boy trouble

Lui: the' his body won't fit in the trunk kind of trouble' or the 'I like him'kind of trouble

Oswald:the 'i like him' kind of trouble

Lui:shame, Nanasaki could have helped with the other one

Oswald:i did ask you,didn't i?

Lui:true

Nanasaki:i am right here!!!

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Lui: sorry it took me so long to get here,i broke down on the way here

Oswald:is your car okay?

Lui:car??

Oswald:....

Nanasaki:.....

Both:....dude.

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Lui:Ozzy,nana,this is flare i found her in a bush!

Oswald:Lui,no

Nanasaki:you can't just keep trying to adopt random children

Lui:....about that....

Both:you already did,didn't you?

Lui:....it's too late now!

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Artie:go to hell!

Lui:i probably should.i really don't know how they've survived this long without they're ruler

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Lui:didn't i die?

Nanasaki:that was an hour ago

Oswald:things change

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Artie: I wrote down all the plans we shouldn't try again

Tammy:*starts reading*'Lydia tries to seduce someone then starts crying on command'

Artie:worked but made everyone uncomfortable

Tammy: 'somali to jump off a building again'

Tammy:this one reads 'throw Lui at enemies like a cat'

Artie:

Oh,no,that one works like a charm put it on the to do list

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Lui:i told Artie his ears turn red when he lies

Tammy:why?

Lui:look

Lui:Artie!do you love us?

Artie,hides his ears:no

Lui:i can see them~

Artie,runs off

Tammy:...nice.

___

Somali:what did you guys get on your card

Tammy: prettiest smile

Somali:i got nicest personality

Artie:most likely to start a bar fight

Lui:most likely to win a bar fight but not start it.

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Finally! I finished it I've been writing this for five days trying to get it to work

Hopefully you all liked it

As for who Tammy and artie are

Tammy is a water,ice and wind faction head or was supposed to be

Artie was supposed to be a fire,lightning and ash faction head

And Lui a Earth,void and creation faction head

They are descendents of gods there only three main ones but there two others which are branches from all of them

There no head of the faction of them though

As there are only two users of each of them

Oswald a user of the life faction

Nanasaki a user of a death faction

And Lui user of both but that no longer matters as they have oath to not use them considering they will be evaporated at the moment they use them

Basically that's it hope you enjoyed good day and good night

(I forgot to put the fact that the character is a merry sue huh?)