Chapter 44.3
No … no. We can't, Jason snapped out of his trance when he heard Emily voice a moan, a throaty moan that was delirious on pleasure and satisfaction. We can't do this …
Why are you stopping? Why place these restrictions on yourself? The beast within Jason roared with dissatisfaction at him. Let loose and relish in it! Take her for yourself, indulge in all of your desires!
No . . . Jason thought before shouting lowly. "No!"
Jason locked away the darkest thoughts that were consuming him and pulled away from Emily. Her legs buckled as she fell down and back on her own feet and she looked at Jason with mixed emotions, her chest rapidly rising and sinking as she tried to calm her breathing.
"No. We . . we can't, Emily. We can't. I - I'm sorry," Jason breathed out as he looked away from Emily, the guilt and shame at his actions preventing him from even staring at her.
Emily looked crestfallen, her heart pounding with pain before she laughed bitterly.
"Can't or won't?" She asked. Her voice was filled with resentment as she locked her eyes on Jason, those brought emerald eyes seemed to bore into Jason's soul and he lowered his head; Jason didn't reply and he turned his back to her while closing his eyes.
"Jason," Emily soft voice pleaded. "I don't care if there's someone else . . . if there are others. I don't care . . . I don't care. I just want to be with you . . . let me be with you."
Neither of them spoke a word and silence ensued before Emily finally picked herself up from the wall she was leaning on; Jason's silence was the answer she got.
"I know you care, Jason. I know you feel the same way . . . just tell me why you won't accept me. Am I not good enough for you?" Emily asked bitterly.
You're too good for me, Emily. So good that I don't deserve you.
Jason couldn't voice his thought and Emily wiped the tears from her eyes before preparing to leave.
"Emily. Wait," Jason tried stopping her before she exited the storehouse but the latter ignored him, prompting him to grab her hand. "Wait. Please."
Jason quickly realized that if he did nothing, if he let her go, if he let her leave like this, then not only would he regret it, he would destroy Emily and her had already harmed her enough.
Fuck it, Jason thought. I'll just figure things out later.
Despite stopping, Emily refused to look at Jason as the latter cleared his throat. "I ca - I can't give you an answer right now. But I can promise you, I will tell you my answer once you turn eighteen."
Emily turned to look at Jason with surprise and the latter swept a hand through his hair while giving a sheepish smile.
"Yeah, call me old-fashioned but you're not old enough to date just yet," he teased and Emily rolled her eyes.
"I am technically an adult," Emily protested sweetly.
"But your also my student," Jason replied. "Once you're eighteen, you'll automatically move to the college curriculum and 'technically' you won't be my student anymore. Until then . . . we can't."
Emily lifted her hand and placed it on one of Jason's cheeks while he closed his eyes. He leaned closer to the warmth emanating from her hand before kissing her outstretched arm.
Is this what love is? Jason asked himself as he basked in Emily's warmth. I do care for Elizabeth, and Katelyn . . . but I did have sex with them before even understanding my feelings for them. But Emily . . .
"And what about the other women in your life?" Emily asked with a 'smile'. Despite telling herself, and him, that she was alright with sharing Jason, her heart was in turmoil.
"I owe them too much," Jason opened his eyes and avoided eye contact with her while mumbling. He managed to cover the guilt he was feeling for lying to her by pretending that he was uncomfortable with her question. "We'll see what happens."
Suddenly, a thought crossed him and he turned back to Emily with raised eyebrows. "What about you and Melanie? What's up with that? Weren't you a touch hostile to her?"
"We . . ." Emily shook her head and pulled away from Jason. "It's . . . nothing."
"You sure?" Jason asked with a raised eyebrow as he held onto to her retreating hand with a strong grasp. Melanie wasn't an average person, and he was worried about what game she was playing by befriending Emily.
". . . I'll let Melanie tell you," Emily said after some hesitation. "Besides, I don't want you to think about her right now . . ."
I want you to think about me, and me alone, Emily thought as she leaned closer to Jason, preparing to kiss him when he raised a finger to her lips, stopping her.
"We've got company," Jason winked and gestured at the door and Emily quickly pulled away.
Two tiny hands and a handful of auburn hair was visible at the corner of the door. Slowly the hair grew bigger and a high forehead appeared before two bright emerald eyes peered at them.
"Alright kid, you can come out," Jason coughed his laughter away while Emily blushed profusely as she turned away from him, her hands covering her chest and the visibly erect nipples that were poking through her shirt. Maple, caught in the act, hesitantly and guiltily walked out from past the door frame.
"I - I'm sorry," Maple looked like she was giving to cry and Emily softened up, her eyes full of gentleness as she gazed at Maple.
"I'll talk to her," Jason said quietly to Emily who hesitated but nodded at the end. She left the storehouse, but not before hastily grabbing her thrown bra, and she patted Maple's head as she exited and Jason sighed again while his face changed. The gentleness etched upon it faded as he watched Emily carefully with a frown.
Something's off, he thought. Emily . . . she was full of desperation and lust. But she's usually more calm, collected, careful. She never struck me as someone who follows her whims and masks themselves like Melanie. Did I cause such a change?
If he thought about it, perhaps he would've realized right then and there what was happening to Emily, but Jason shook his head to rouse his thoughts before turning to Maple.
"Please don't tell Alice. About me and Emily," Jason said to Maple. "It'll hurt her if you say anything."
Maple nodded vehemently and Jason cocked his head in bemusement. Since Emily left, he noticed how distraught Maple was. Even before this event, he had caught her staring at him silently whenever she thought he wasn't paying attention.
Very quickly, realization dawned on Jason and he gave a low chuckle while nodding repeatedly.
"Hmm, eh. Of course, of course," Jason murmured, his voice low and gravel while Maple froze like a block of ice. "You recognize me, don't you? The real me?"
Maple hesitated, unsure of what to do as sweat dripped down her back. She was terrified of him, but curious all the same and she wasn't certain of what he would do if she outright admitted it. Regardless, as she looked up and saw his smiling face, she gritted her teeth and nodded.
"You're the Beast," she whispered in a hoarse voice.
"That's right," Jason nodded, his dark eyes swallowing all the light in the room, mesmerizing the child in front of him as he continued in a very low, gravel whisper. "I am the Beast. The Monster. Fenrir."