We had to pick 2 languages to learn, so I picked two I already spoke, why not repeat a little and maybe even learn.
Oh yeah, when it turned out I speak so well they made me someone important...
The other subjects are the same for me, I had tutors, I could do the finals, just fine... So everyone asked for my help...
But then, the third week we had to go to a class camp. Cool. There I come out!
Until that, I holded back, I calculated, that, if I am in the first 20 percent, I look good enough to be clever, but not that good, to make people like me for my knowledge.
So clothing... Yeah, unisex is great, but I got the blue thingy on me growing, I had to somehow hide it. Socks and shirt under T-shirt. Still not suspicious, still warm and I am drooling over how useful they. Now I can not burn myself and it is flexible enough to do PE class.
Yeah, that was a little bit awkvard. They put me in the boys class, since I overdid all girls and it would drag the girls morale back and nullify it. After that, the same went. They called me in and said, do whatever you like, train, whatever, just do not at least look better, than the sportsmen here...
Oh yeah, from that day, I could train in the small PE room alone to my shooting contests. Shooting is the one thing I like, I do not know why. My womanly self says, that I need to show, that I am strong through this. I did not actually shoot in the school, but held coins on the top of the gun, for 1, then to 5, then to 10, 15, 30 and 45 minutes. Then I trained how fast I can piece together fully, not, just partially, my guns. I needed permission of course, but they just looked down and held their heads. If this is what I want, then this is what I get.
Also I needed to go to the school psychologist on the weekly. She was nice, she was the only one, who actually recognized my secret and she understood it. The main aim was to keep me in check, if I would do anything rash, but I did not have to lie, aside from smoking, I had no bad things on my mind. At that time, smoking was good for me. I am not advertising it, but it was 5 minutes of freedom from the world and the things I like or hate. I mean, at least I went out to the fresh air. The psychologist understood, but still she had the vibe, that I came from space. She just could not write anything bad. My words and actions were normal. So was I. At least I think, that there are more unstable students here, who need her help.
After all, I could make a pretty calm and comfortable rythim made. I realized, no people cares if I am in a skirt or in a regular pant. Or if I wear lipsticks or not.
What am I? The first few week showed to the teacher, that I am fairly clever, to the people, that I am a human and to the psychologist, that I am more than normal, especially not unstable. For me, I am someone, who has a secret, what has no time and people to be revealed.
It is pissing me off. Come on. Say something. Anyone. Either they are avoiding the topic at all cost, or I am that invisible.
Now at class camp at least will be the time to introduce ourselves deeper to our classmates and have real conversations about opinions of the others. 3 days 2 night approximately 30 people put together. If nothing, I literally ask them, that do they know and avoid me. Say, that I am stupid, but for me, they do not need to know and point out me daily, just let me know, that they know me, at least, this much.