How to (supposedly) survive a zombie apocalypse [Completed]

[Sunday 10:00 AM]

I'm currently sitting on the couch as I look at the wall like it's the most interesting thing in the world. This is the result of searching for an hour for a story to read and not finding anything decent.

I've already completed all the games I have 100%, so I don't have much of a choice.

After questioning my existence, I decided to go back to looking for a fanfic to read, and I ended up finding a very interesting one about Dragonball.

Now the real test begins.... see the labels of the story.

"Let's see, there is no harem or evil psychopathic protagonist, there is no ultra-broken system that makes you Christ, so all right" I said with a tired tone.

"Well I guess I can read it after breakfast" I said to then get up and go to the kitchen.

And yes, I know how to cook, this due to being alone for a long time and living in Latin America, there learning to cook is almost an obligation to survive, I also like to cook.

The strange thing is that the water supply has not worked for days and I have had to use all the water in the refrigerator for cooking.

This mainly because I am too lazy to go to a restaurant and because I prefer food made by me.

After the most American breakfast possible, I mean scrambled eggs with bacon and orange juice, I started reading the story.

But I made the most serious mistake in the fanfiction, not reading the description, and well, there is no harem, but not because the protagonist is decent but because this story is of a yaoi genre.

"Where the fuck is the chlorine?!!" I yelled after reading something unnecessarily descriptive.

I'm not homophobic or anything like that, but I follow the teachings of a wise man 'What they put in the butt is not of my importance'.

After burning my eyes with orange juice when I found no chlorine, I sat down on the couch again.

"Well that was ugly, but at least I lost my boredom for a few minutes" I said with the same face I had after seeing boku no piko.

Not having anything better to do, I decided to look through my bedroom window, after obviously deleting the fanfic along with the application.

"Today is a nice day I have to admit, but it's not like that changed my decision to stay home" I said as I looked at the surprisingly empty street.

"Hmm, they're probably in a human rights march, that's fun."

After a while I could see a person who seemed to be doing half-life cosplay, only instead of a headcrab he had a mushroom covering his head.

"It seems like a combination of half-life zombies and the last of us, it's quite interesting" I said with a bit of intrigue.

After watching him walk for a while I got bored, and decided to see what's new on YouTube, finding a video of Dross from two weeks ago.

"Let me guess, the world is going to end and it's disturbing" I said after seeing the title.

The video spoke disturbingly of a mushroom created by the Russians after their discontent with the new president of the United States. stupid actually.

"Yup the world is going to end again, what a surprise" I murmured in a bored tone.

In the end, I decided to ignore it and play megaman zero 4 in hard mode (which means exploding like a popcorn after being shot), until I got to Craft, who beat me up.

After a few hours of unsuccessful attempts, I decided to eat lunch and ended up taking a nap (which is VERY weird).

[8:00 PM]

I woke up after hearing someone knocking on the door, and after internally cursing, I decided to see who it is.

Looking out the living room window, I could say that it was the guy in the cosplay costume from earlier, but this one seemed a bit agitated, so I decided to do what I always do when I don't know someone, just ignore him.

I decided to go to the kitchen to make some dinner and ended up seeing memes about the Russian tripaloski mushroom.

"I probably have to water it down with vodka to make it grow hehe" I said jokingly.

I started looking for information about the fungus, and it turns out that it is indeed a threat to humans, since it infects others very easily.

The symptoms are: loss of consciousness, aggressive attitude towards other people and changes in the physical body. The latter depending on what mutation the fungus is.

They also grow some fungi in the body, and depending on their blood type they can present mutations, with drastic changes in the way it spreads or improves the body.

The worst thing is that they are more realistic than I thought, since they do not need to eat, because the fungus feeds on moonlight and infects the host's body, making it more fungus than human.

"Good thing I ignored the guy out there" I said with a little fear.

And just at that moment I heard my door fall apart.