Not a Boy

"I'm going home now."

The pale darkness in her eyes seemed to be an unfillable infinite void. The slump of her shoulders sank deeper as I watched her sauntered towards the door.

"What about me?! I have no place to stay for tonight!"

The lanterns in the room dimmed as the candles within breathed their final wisps of air. Her silhouette at the doorway is visible in the final brilliance of the setting sun as she turns around.

"Life's not fair."

"That's all you have to say?! You promised me!"

My voice strained my fingers swollen from work and my legs buckled from running back and forth. Unable to believe that these types of people exist I just sat there on my knees.

"Like I care."

Thump

The door shut and the air calmed down and became chilly. The sun's power was now all thinned out and my thoughts raced through my head. How can someone break their promises like that? I worked the entire afternoon and for what? Where can I go now?

My hands... WHATEVER

Pulling all the little bits of me that fell apart I decided that I'll just do my own thing.

Shuffling outside of the tavern I walked back into the side alleyway too tired to make it anywhere else in town. As I walked I started thinking about everything that happened that day and the words of my Mother that I listened to throughout my journey here. 

  I walked toward the back of the alley and found some hazy dark sheets of wool. Sitting down on the ground I covered myself in those sheets and huddled into the corner. 

I hope that Mom can come find me soon. I really don't like this place, but if this is how people play like here I'll just have to be better. Closing my eyes the only thing I could think of was how much stronger I needed to be. If only I was stronger all these people would know not to mess with me. First, it was that big guy chasing me and then when I thought I had found someplace safe this woman decided to show me the feeling of wasting my hard work and trust.

Getting a bit teary-eyed I soon drifted into what I hoped would be a better reality. The dream world...

"Tell me where she is!"

"AUGH"

Where am I?! Why is this person chained up in these black cloudy chains and this other mountain of a person with a giant anvil on a rod hurting him?

"I will never tell you even if you convert me!"

"We'll see about that! YAH." Another great swing of the hammer right on the incapacitated person's chest.

"AAUGH!" The screams are so horrible. Yet the voice of the person seemed so familiar. Blood splattered all over the dark floor as the horrid scene unfolded in front of me.

I didn't feel anything couldn't move anything. I was only subjected to watching the whole thing.

This has to be a dream right?! My mind is cloudy and can't remember what happened before I was here.

"Soon your mind will be corrupted and you won't be able to protect her!"

"Hah... you're funny..." His voice... where have I heard that voice before?

"Start the conversion!"

Suddenly ten mystic-robed men rose from the dark ground and began chanting. Black and red runes flew and grasped at the chained man causing cries of agony to spew from the man's mouth.

What is this hell?! It looks so real even though I can't feel anything at the moment. I blink a few times as my vision fills up with fog and the scene blurs. 

Wait I want to know what is happening!

"Morning Wei!"

The crust in my eyes pulled against my eyelids opening. A figure standing over me as I tried to adjust my vision rubbing the eye boogers out of the way. It didn't take long for my eyes to adjust to the light in the alleyway and realize that it was my Mother's voice.

"Good morning Mom." 

Pulling off the dirty covers I had on last night I began to stand. Huh, my Mom feels a bit different right now. Her hair was black as well as all her other defining features which were originally red. 

"I can see that you are in need of a bath right about now."

"Yes I do, but Mom is that really you?"

"Of course, I just disguised myself like I did for you."

"But you're shorter and you feel different somehow..."

There was a slight childish twinkle in her eyes. Very different from the wise and strong gaze she used to give when we locked eyes.

"Might be because I am younger than when you saw me last."

A cheeky smile stretched across her face and a playful chuckle pushed through her teeth. 

"I don't get it..."

"Don't worry about it. It's just that some circumstances happened last night and this was the only way past it."

Her smile faded as if she was reliving an intense battle of life and death. Her eyes stopped glimmering and were replaced by this dull shade of gray.

"Mom, are you okay?"

"Huh? Oh ya, I'm fine! Now don't worry about me Let go to the public bathhouse and get you cleaned up."

The shine and brightness that was there a moment ago came back as if nothing happened in between.

"I only have a couple of yuan left."

"Here hand them over."

Pulling out a small silver sack from her waist she motioned me to put the rest of my yuan into it. Reaching into my pocket pulling them out and placing them into the bag I felt a sense of responsibility that had been lifted from my shoulders.

"Alright follow me!"

With her cheerful voice guiding me all the negative stuff that happened to me yesterday felt insignificant to what the future may present.

"I know this nice bathhouse down the road, only 8 yuan for the full bath experience!"

She turned back and looked at me as we were walking down the street.

"Isn't that such a steal! hehe" 

It's like she became a totally different person. Either that or her younger self was always this vibrant and joyful. It feels really nice to be around her. Just listening to her voice soothed the aches in my legs and hands.

We arrived at a large wooden building with a reception in the middle separating the male and female bathrooms. My Mom went up the the receptionist woman and began to strike up a conversation.

Looking around I could see that this part of town was mainly for entertainment and people getting together. Buildings with children asking their parents to buy the toys in them. Buildings with joyous laughter and families spending time with each other littered throughout the street and with even more smells. My abdomen lets out a resounding growl as I look at my Mom. I really hope we get some nice food after this bath. 

"So one male pass and a female pass?"

"No no two female passes."

"But- he looks like your little brother."

My Mom turned around and looked at me. I shrugged and smiled a bit.

"Haha, she does but I can assure you that she is my daughter."

"Oh my! You look quite young to have a daughter."

"Oh thank you! Here is the payment."

My Mom dropped a small string of yuan on the counter and waited for the woman to count up all of the coins. 

"All set here are both your passes and please enjoy your stay!"

Holding out both the passes and with a slight bow the woman handed them over to my Mom. The first time I saw some real mannerisms in my time here.

"Let's go, Wei!" 

She ushered me over to the right side with a pink silken drape with the female character woven into the cloth. I heard some whispering behind me as I lifted the side of the drape out of my way and stepped into the bathhouse. 

Steam seeped out of the bathhouse and warmed up my pores. After a night out sleeping in the brisk alley air, it felt so much nicer and warmer in here.

The left side of the wall is a cabinet space with a separator for privacy. What I'm guessing is everyone's belongings and clothes are stored there. The walls all around are packed with vertical bamboo. There is a wooden gate to the right side of the room where the steam is coming out from.

"Come here, Wei! We can use this empty cabinet!"

I walked towards my Mom's voice past the dividers between the cabinets until I reached one of the far cabinets on the side. I found my Mom eagerly taking off her clothes and folding them into the cabinet.

"Come on take your clothes off! I asked for a cleaning service for this cabinet number too so you don't have to worry about wearing dirty clothes after being clean!"

That's actually pretty nice. I wish I had enough money to do anything and live nicely in this city.

I placed my katana vertically on the back side of the cabinet took off my clothes and threw them in the cleaning basket.

"I gotta go pee real bad! I'll be waiting for you inside!"

She seems really excited to get into the bath.

I turned around and started to head towards the door when suddenly I heard a thud next to me.

"Eeeek there's a boy in the girl's room!"

I looked to my right a little shocked and stunned. A girl who looked around the same age as me with her long smooth hair below her shoulders. Holding her arms across her body and backing away from me. A wooden tub on the floor with clothes spilling out of it.

"Wait wait don't scream I'm a girl."

I lifted my arms up waving trying to disperse the tense situation. I grabbed my chest bindings and untied them.

"Oh, you really are a girl. But why is your hair so short?"

"I was always told by my dad to keep it short."

I am trying to grow it out now, but that's going to take a few years for me to get anywhere close to what I have seen in the town. 

Suddenly a few women rushed out of within the bathhouse looking concerned and alert.

"Jia, did you say there was a boy in here?"

"Oh sorry, Mom I thought this short-haired girl was a boy. But nope just has a weird dad."

"Hehe, I guess he is."

The women look over at me with towels wrapped around their bodies and hair tied up in a bun. I looked over to the basket of clean towels and decided to go over and pick one up.

"Jia when you are ready join us we are starting our daily routine."

"I'm coming Mom!"

The woman went back into the bath and left me and this girl named "Jia" in the room. Before anything else happened I went over for a nice large and clean towel.

"Well from what you heard my name is Jia Hong what is your name?"

I turned around towel in hand as she was walking over.

"My name is Wei."

Visible confusion showed on her face as her left eyebrow raised a bit.

"Is that it? Is that your family name or your first name?"

"I don't have a family name. But now that I think about it maybe I should ask my mom."

Jia walks past me and grabs a towel hair glistening in the light of the lanterns flowing like a black river.

"Alright, I'm ready! You want to join my Mom and her friends for some fun?!"

"Thank you, but my Mom is waiting for me in there too."

"Oh alright let's go find our Moms'."

Walking towards the door I feel like I get to fully relax my body in this place. I was so tense yesterday that it feels unnatural to tense up my muscles. But in here where the steam is so nice and calm I can't possibly stress out.

Pushing the doors open the steam poured out and fogged my vision as I took a few steps in.

Looking around the place looked much bigger than it was outside stretching many meters back. The bathrooms are to the right the showers to the right and the large steamy ponds in the center. Each one is a different size and women and girls in each one conversing and having a great time. Smiles can be seen on each of their faces. As if their emotions were contagious I also felt a bit giddy and excited in my heart. 

"Wei over here at the showers!"

I look over to the showers and see my Mom standing there with a wooden bucket of water.

"Coming Mom!"  Trying out how Jia reacted to her call from her Mother.

I skipped over to my Mom before I realized my big mistake. Her arms were lifting up the moment I got in her range and it was as if it was in slow motion. The water from the wooden bucket launched itself towards me and I could only block with my arms and close my eyes. 

SPLASH

"Mom~! That's not fair now my towel is wet!"

"Hehe, it's fine I got more towels here. That was real funny though!"

"Ya it was, but now it's my turn!" 

I looked around for something to throw. Found it! I threw my towel at my Mom as a distraction and lifted a coincidently placed bucket of water by my feet. Picking up and swinging my arm around I let myself stop right as the opening of the bucket was aimed towards my Mom.

SPLUSH

"Haha, how was that?" 

"That was really good Wei! I didn't know you can move like that!"

Huh? I guess that was a bit more agile than I was before. Honestly, I have felt so light ever since I took my clothes off. Completely forgot that my clothes were weighted.

"I guess the heavy clothes worked out!" She pulls off the now super wet towel from her face her sweet smile beaming in my direction.