Chapter 50: Feelings

I knew I must look like an abandoned dog ready to run or bite, my eyes darted this way and that. Finally I focused on Chase and I let that barrier up just a little. I was strong, I could be strong for them. I wasn't ready to let them go yet. The calm he sent me eased my fight or flight response.

He was close enough to touch me now but he didn't reach out. He just waited for my next move. I opened my mouth to speak but the words wouldn't come out. I closed my mouth and I sent out to Chase a mental response to his unanswered question, "Years". That one word hurt to admit, it felt like razors in my mind, slicing deep and painfully.

I only wanted to be normal. Why did I have to be so screwed up? What I would give to just be an average girl falling for an average boy... but then I wouldn't have met all of them.

My hands pulled at the collar around the oversized shirt Michael had given me. The feeling of restriction crept inside my pain filled mind. I wanted to rip the shirt off. I wanted to scratch at the place my shackles had been. I wanted to flee instead of reliving my past.

My wolf begged me to let Chase in, to let go of the pain. He could take it all away. Why hold onto it like this? I let the rest of the mind barriers fall and crumble to pieces. Calm instantly squashed my pain and something else, some new feeling was given to me as well. This feeling was sweet, passionate, and made me want to grab onto Chase and pull him close. What was this? The feeling eliminated any residual darkness leftover from the burdensome question. The feeling was a bright light in the dead of night.