68 Chapter 68: Mental Blocks
Chapter 68: Mental Blocks
~Silva POV~
[August 30, X784]
[Flow of nature]
Darkness…
All I see is darkness trying to locate the spirit within the flow of the world.
I'm having difficulty locating this so-called flow that Mavis speaks of even having my clones increase the pacing of the gap.
And yet I feel blind as when I started locating my inner magic.
Considering I'm merely a ball of spirit I'm in the right direction but I feel at a loss of what I should do or what I could be doing.
I'm lost…
No, I can't think like that.
That's the failure way of thinking and I'm no failure.
No failure…
I'm not that anymore I'm… not anymore…
Floating around feeling the mental strain get me I felt –
*Wooosh*
/////
"Ah…!"
Gasping I felt my spirit flicker out as I clicked my teeth in clear annoyance with Mavis hovering above me questioning the agenda, "Sooo… I take it you blacked out in the flow. Haven't found the flow of nature yet my dear student?"
Taking in a deep breath calming my nerves down I replied to Mavis in a calm tone bitterly taking in my frustration, "Yeah… I got to the passing where all I saw was darkness. I just can't seem to find the flow you speak of I try. I really do… what am I doing wrong?"
What am I doing wrong?
I feel like I'm in the right direction but feel lost at what to do in that black void called the connection.
All I needed to do next according to Mavis that I connect my spirit to the flow to finally unlock my Magic Power but what am I doing wrong?
Is there something off I haven't figured out yet?
Or another world will kind of situation?
Maybe I'm just a failure at using Magic that I don't have a talent in it?
What if –
"Silva!"
Ah!
Interrupting my thoughts as I felt bitter and frustrated at my own failures Mavis sighed at me taking a seat next to me trying to encourage me that this kind of process takes time, "Sigh… listen Silva. Magic is a gift, not something you can just command at will. The magic in you is simply waiting to be unlocked. Every magic of this world we call Earthland is waiting for its caster, but you can't have a frail mind or weak faith."
Turning my head towards Mavis wiping the small tears forming at my weakness she responded in a serious but comforting tone, "The magic could destroy you if you think badly or have a frail mind. You need to have faith and patience in this kind of matter. I know you can do it I have faith you can. You simply need to believe in yourself more."
Wiping the tears off and putting my face away from her I respond in a silent tone rethinking my situation, "Ok… ok… thanks for the confidence and ease of mind. I really appreciate it very much…"
She only smiled as I took time to calm down at my own weakness.
But like Mavis said it takes time and I should trust her faith in the one she believes I can do this.
Can I really do it though since all my life I have tried to catch up but always fail or fall short even attempting…
I can't think like that.
Maybe I need a small breaker after thinking too hard.
Sigh…
I need to refresh my head a bit…
Taking some time off and calming myself down from my funk would probably be for the best.
I should test my hand on doing some requests soon. I do need the Jewels to pay for better weapons in my downtime. Soon enough the better.
I have made some good progress upgrading my skills including on my <Cryokinesis> whenever I get the chance improving along with my swordsmanship skills in the progress.
But for now, I'm satisfied with the result of my work obtaining this level of control. Sadly, though I still need some work on producing my Magic Power it's still a work in progress, but I should start doing some side quests to earn some EXP or items in the near future coming.
This might be a sign saying I really should start to focus on my quest and level-ups right now. I should get some cash as well as some decent rewards here.
Getting dressed up for the day might as well see if there is anything, I could collect from the request board.
But otherwise, the last few days understanding my Magic has been going swimmingly well to make some moves.
I should test out if my <Glyphs> added with some Magic properties of other elements would be affected when I unlock Mana Method through my studies allowing me to use my skills without cost to my MP bar in the process.
Ahh…
Now wouldn't that be a game-changer for me to have?
Certainly, won't have to worry about using up my MP once I crack how or unlock my Magic Power but whatever the case I should prepare regardless.
Oh, well.
Time to get going to see what's up on the request board to help me keep my mind off Mana Manipulation for now...
/////
Entering through the guild building construction site to behold I manage to see the progression being made with everyone working so hard to complete their new home.
I couldn't help but smile at this but simply moved to the job request observing a few meetings Nab as usual standing and doing nothing while I muttered at the list of requests, "Ok let's see what the request board has on store? Deal with a Fire Devil? Plains overrun by Sirens. Search for a missing ring? Come on is there any good ones I could do…"
Trying to find a good request was hard enough but that was when my eyes landed on a quest earning my interest in viewing the request that was suitable for me, "Hmm…? Let's see here… Bird Outbreak huh?
----
Request: Subdue
Provider: Pauletta
Rank: B
Description: Oh, jeez, oh gosh! Some gigantic bird things appeared out of nowhere on the beach! A lot of them too! They're really loud and annoying, so we've gotta keep our distance! Maybe they're having a bird party? Anyway, please do something about them!
Rewards: 75,000J
----
Couldn't help myself I decided to take this job request from the request board as my own activated giving me an update that I already accepted in the process.
[Ding!]
[Quest is generated!]
----
Side Quest: Bird Outbreak
Description: This is a request from the client Pauletta who wants to subdue the Flutters around Akane Beach causing a disturbance in the area.
Objective: Subdue the group of Flutters [0/20].
Rewards: Crushing King.
Failure: Shame, or possible death.
[Status: Active]
----
Interesting it seems like this one equipment this time and no EXP this time around. But considering it's a subdued type of request maybe my ability [THE GAMER] already calculated what I need and thus instead provided only one piece of equipment this time.
This could be a good way to see how far I've gone on my own. I can at least head out to the beach for some fun time according to the request that it's located at Akane Beach.
Taking the request paper to Mirajane who was guarding the makeshift bar she greeted me happily, "Morning Silva! Haven't seen yah in a while. Team Natsu was interested in you joining their request to help Lucy a week ago but haven't found you around the time doing a job request involving a play."
Wait to involve of a –
Oh, dear lord!
Oh, Christ almighty!!
I dodged that bullet!
Thank you LUCK stat!!
Feeling relieved I gave the job request paper to Mira getting her attention immediately, "Oh! I see you going on another request this time?"
Responding with a happy grin followed with a nod I got curious if she could help me in Take-Over Magic in a curious tone with Mavis floating behind, "I was busy training in the forest outside of Magnolia Town. I figured it was time to see the results by testing on this Subdue request. By the way, if it's not too much trouble could I ask you for tutors on hand-to-hand combat perhaps?"
That seemed to surprise her when I suggested she teach me about hand-to-hand combat she nervously responded, "Oh-h? I didn't think you would ask me that request but well… I'm sure I can ask Elfman to help you out. But otherwise, I'll get your request posted it will take some time though."
Raising an eyebrow at her I decided to take her word for it for another time as she left to make my request to the client taken quickly leaving me behind.
Although she seems kind of sus right now.
<Observe>.
[Mirajane Strauss Lv.? Fairy Tail Wizard
Description: Mirajane Strauss is an S-Class Mage of the Fairy Tail Guild, as well as its "drawing card", and is often a model for the Sorcerer Magazine. She is the older sister of Elfman and Lisanna. Currently, she hasn't had the time to find out where Mystogan is but can't find where he lives. She can only hope she could stay around for him to finally pop up asking more about Edolas after her conversation with Porlyusica about Edolas.]
Ah…
That makes much more sense.
Seeing the reason, I recall that Mirajane was also a master at Hand-to-Hand Combat thinking I could use the time to train in close-range combat.
I waited a bit as Mirajane gave me the info on where to find my client I heard Mavis chuckle getting my attention directed at me, "So… interested in learning another form of Magic after getting rejected?"
I could only roll my eyes as I began taking out Rongo Rongo viewing the contents of Magnolia Town and locating the homes I mentally smirked finding Mystogan's home hoping Mirajane would question him.
I'll be sure to bring this up to her the next chance I get to meet.
I closed Rongo Rongo off calling to Mavis it was time to leave causing the small ghost girl to smile at my words, "Alright! Come on Mavis time to get started on the job."
She perked up as she trailed after me with some excitement of tagging along and traveling around with me.
Oh, but first…
For now, though I got a job to do. The approaching arc is the Tower of Heaven and lots of shit goes down on the 15th of next month. Best to get as many LEVEL UPS, items, and stats the best I can while mastering my Magic in the process.
But otherwise, the next stop taking care of some pest control!
