This is the story of a crazy lich who possesses an internal game system and brings catastrophe to the entire world. “Let’s look at the daily quests today… it’s the damned choose one-of-two-options-type again. Destroy a town with a population of 30,000 people or above; reward: 10,000 evil points. Steal lollipops from 3 children; reward: 1 evil point. If neither of the quests is completed, then 2 points will be deducted.” “Tsk! You think I’m stupid? If I really destroyed a town, a crusade of Myth-ranked Holy Knights would definitely come hunting me down. Even if I earned the points, there wouldn’t be any life left in me to spend them. I better just go be a kindly lollipop bandit.” I’ve already had enough of being a notorious lich. Who says a lich can’t be a good person? I’m definitely going to beat this damned system and be an upright and dignified good man.
On the mountains that were filled with the smell of sulfur, there was a gigantic cavern where a large beast seemed to be faking to sleep.
Graceful, beautiful, large and savage, these contradictory phrases fuse together perfectly in front of this beast whose size resembles a small hill. The sharp knife-like scales reflect a stream of light that mirrors the sun and those shining silver claws had the size of flagpoles.
Its very existence was the incarnation of majesty and its breath could bring about storm and lightning. Under the gaze of those mystical dragon eyes, it felt as though life was coming to an end.
In this moment, this natural-born ruler narrowed its eyes, as though it was looking at something. Out of a sudden, it gave out a frightening roar.
"Ao ao ao!"
Following the gigantic beast's lightning-like roaring, the entire mountain shook and innumerable demonic beasts escaped in response to the roar. The savage carnivorous demonic vultures escaped frantically in all directions just like frightened sparrows.
When the being on the peak of the food chain, the true owner of this mountain — Ancient Red Dragon Einz Mezus roared in anger, there was no living being that wouldn't feel fear.
Even so, the reason for that roar made one speechless…
"AH HAHAHAHA, TO THINK THAT YOU WOULD HAVE SUCH A DAY. I'M ABOUT TO DIE OF LAUGHTER."
The gigantic beast was actually hugging its stomach and started rolling about. The entire cavern started to tremor violently, as though it was going to collapse anytime soon.
"Shut up, Little Red!"
Yes, the person in front of her was me, Lich Roland. But right now, my situation wasn't that good…
"…Isn't this our wisest Lord Roland? Where's your body? Why is there only a head left of you?"
In front of the gigantic beast reminiscent of the mountains, there was a skeleton head which didn't even reach the size of one of its scale. Un, that's me.
"Hmph." I really didn't want to bother with her, but the scorpion-tailed lion on the other side was reporting to its master about its acquisition.
"Awuu, awuu." The scorpion-tailed lion's weird nasally voice was mixed in with some dragon language. I couldn't really make out what it was saying, but Einz Mezus seemed to be getting more and more interested in its story.
"Oh oh, so you are saying that he was first fought over by a bunch of vultures, then the dogmen hit him down. Afterwards, the griffins stole him from the dogmen and after witnessing everything, you all decided to rob the griffins. You all found him quite familiar, so you decided to gift him, for me to enjoy?"
"Roland, what an exciting adventure you had. I will share this with Adam and the rest."
Ignoring this stupid dragon, I retained my silence.
Yes, the bones of the Lich weren't that good to digest. With only my skullcap remaining, I enjoyed a tour about Sulfur Mountain City's food chain and went up one level at a time, finally ending up in the hands of Einz Mezus who was at the top of the food chain.
Of course, I had a way to directly recover by expanding my mana, but if I waited until noon, my skeleton body would automatically reassemble itself under the effects of my previously cast spell. Thus, I didn't had any intention of wasting mana to forcefully reassemble myself and this resulted in me… enjoying a tour, familiarising myself with Sulfur Mountain City's food chain.
"You are getting overjoyed too fast. Think about it, what could be the reason for me ending up in this state before you?"
The Red Dragon used its gigantic claws to support its chin, putting out a position similar to a human thinking. In the beginning, she was still rather carefree but very soon, she thought of a possibility and her body bent, causing her chin to knock violently on the floor, but it wasn't the time for her to care about the pain.
"It can't be. Don't tell me that that person has come back?"
I nodded my head bitterly.
"Right, she's back. Furthermore, it's a leveled-up version with a great boost in her specs. Look at how high I flew this time…"
Before I finished my sentence, the gigantic dragon actually started bellowing.
"Quick, quick! Help me put up a 'Not free for battle' sign at the bottom of the hill. Just tell her that I went out to visit my friends. Right, where was the key to the safe? Throw it into the volcano, we mustn't let that brat into my treasure vault at any costs. Forget it, I am really leaving now."
That day, the gigantic dragon remembered the old times when terror ruled over here, all due to that rascal… The shame when her proud dragon scales were full of children drawings after an afternoon nap, the fear of another instance when her treasure vault became filled with water, the smell of fresh meat being mixed with sulfur and lava, the insult when those shiny golden coins of hers were converted into worthless glass…
"Meow, I am not like those dumb lizards, you think that this shining glass could be worth all those gold coins? Dream on!"
"Wuuuuu, I just wanted to made Auntie Little Red happy. Everyone always says that dragon auntie likes shiny things. Wuu, Ann is sorry, don't hate Ann."
Back then, facing a crying little girl and the resentment of her parents, Adam and Margaret, and my 'you made a little girl cry' kind of snickering, even the gigantic dragon was unable to retain her dignity and she could only give in and attempted to console Ann.
"Un, un, Sister Dragon loves Ann the most. Ann, don't cry anymore, be obedient Ann. Sister has some sweets for you. No, this is a god equipment, it is worth a lot of money... Here, I'll give it to you. You don't like it? Then try this one, the blessed winged armor. You could wear it when you grow older…"
From my own experience, which could be seen by those vandalized precious books as evidence, the scariest part about rascals was not their ability to cause devastation, but rather it was when, after they were finished with their trouble making, you, the victim, still had to be the one to wrap up the whole disaster. If you were to reprimand them a little harsher and they started to cry, you even had to pay the price to console them.
That time, Einz Mezus paid a God Equipment, a set of Epic chainmail that she treasured and two… lollipops. Actually, I honestly thought the items before that were unneeded, just two lollipops would have been enough. Of course, I didn't take the initiative to point that out to this dumb dragon.
Right now, hearing that Annie had come back, she remembered the misery she suffered in the past to a degree, that even the Ancient Red Dragon dubbed as the Disaster of Veron was forced to go into hiding.
Against the Attack of the Rascals, even gigantic dragons would have to kneel before them.
"Don't panic, she is still in Sulfur Mountain City. I will inform her when she comes up to the mountains. But now, since we have met, there are some things that I want to discuss with you."
"Discuss what? I have to move my treasure vault! I am busy."
"How about we talk about your mother?"
It was a rude question, but Little Red calmed down quite a bit after hearing it
"What do you mean? The self-proclaimed Dragon Empress Molly? What about her?"
Yes, the Ancient Red Dragon Einz Mezus was the unfilial daughter of Dragon Empress Molly. She was the rebellious daughter who had been exiled by the underground dragon tribes, and just like every teenage girl, who left home during their rebellious period, she has a lot of grudges against her mother and brethren.
"She has her eyes on Sulfur Mountain City. Or more concisely, the Fire Elemental God sealed below us. Don't tell me that you have never noticed that there was a Malevolent God sealed here."
"…I had been wondering for a long time why it was so comfortable to sleep here, so warm, just like a hot pit. So it was because there was a hearth hiding below..."
Alright, it should come as no surprise, that the Red Dragons and Fire Elementals noth like active mountains. To her, if there really was a Fire Elemental God sealed underneath, it only served as a very comfortable source of heat.
"So, the present situation has gotten a little bit troublesome now. The seal below your home has already become their target. It is just a matter of time before the fellows from other underground cities organize an alliance army and come here. I'm sure you don't want to see your house turn into a mess and find your treasure vault smashed and robbed after a nap.
Furthermore, Annie is about to take over as Adam's successor. Even though she used to be a rascal, nevertheless she is the rascal that we all brought up together. Now those fellows down there are about to make their move... are you willing to see our foster child get bullied around?"
Hearing this, a scarlet red glint of rage flashed across the dragon's eye. Accompanying the killing intent was a frightening pressure.
As a tangible dragon pressure was exerted, the strong quasi-legend demonic beast scorpion-tailed lion was frightened to the point of huddling up. Me as the one directly facing that pressure, I merely smiled.
I understood her. Little Red might laze around in her house a lot, but she definitely wasn't a fool. Her spies sent her a lot of intelligence.
Also, her mouth might be a little harsh, but the one who doted on Annie the most was still this dragon lass who was way past her marriage age, but still single and flooding with maternal love. She viewed Annie as half a daughter, otherwise, why would a Red Dragon who are known to be greedy and selfish, bear to give out a precious defensive god equipment.
Now that I mentioned that Annie was going to be bullied, her killing intent would naturally be directed towards those fools in Sulfur Mountain City, who seemed to think that they could ascend the heavens.
"Stop with the crap, just tell me what you have planned already. Let's just do as always, you be the Brains to think of a plan, and shall be the Brawn to crush them under my arms!"
Hearing this, I laughed gleefully. Since Little Red was willing to become my fighter, my goal in coming here today has been half-realized. As for the other half…
"I want to stage a show! A good show of an evil dragon invading a city."
…Now that I was done preparing the stage. All that was left was my quest!
Reedited by Devils_Advocate and his Team, the "Pranav Memorial Foundation"