Ch 11 AN ABRUPT SURGERY

All of us are born crazy

Then some of us remain that way.

SAMUEL BECKETT.

ELENA POV.

He held me against him and pushed me to the ground. And I could feel his breath against mine and I gotta say; he smelled good.

Aren't I being very perceptive?

"I...

"Don't even say I'm dirty. Or anything I washed twice today." Hilmen bickered. More like justifying and this is the first time I didn't feel angry when I wasn't able to control. A new emotion was lingering in my mind but can it last?

Can I still trust my heart?

Fate has betrayed me twice.

Should I still believe?

"I was going to say, you smell good," I said, with a very calming tone and expression. And it would be a lie if I say it was a lie because at this moment the only thing that I was enjoying was his muddy smell. I could enjoy the muddy smells?

Am I changing?

Maybe that's the real me.

No, it isn't.

I'm a killer.

He was not calm at all right now. And his swollen eyes were giving the manifestation of how much he has cried and he seems to be taking it out on me. But what made him look like this? I wonder.

"I do?" He replied with a confused attitude while twinkling his eyes like a kid.

"Yep, now are we gonna talk like this? Or when you're planning to stand up?" I raised my brow, giving him a questioning look.

"I'm a little annoyed by his behaviour today, he's throwing tantrums like a little kid," I muttered, not that loud that he could hear.

"Yep, you are right" He sighed, avoiding eye contact and not really paying attention to the position he's in.

"I'm a kid, sorry for annoying you." He got up and turned with his back facing me. He was sulking. I guess he was hiding his tears but I'm not supposed to console him. I shouldn't give him hopeless hope.

Great, that's how it should be.

"Don't you wanna know, the DETAILS?" I asked to change the topic emphasising the thing we came for.

"No, I'm not interested in your logical plan and reasoning." He responded and I can bet he had an annoyed face and our conversation just ended like that. He turned away and I didn't want to bother him because I'm not good with emotions and I can't even sort mine so how can I help to sort him .

I came back to the room where I stayed last time with Sierra and Hilmen was in her mom's room. This house is not a remarkable place from the beginning. Since a person died here and today another will die.

Yep, that's it.

Murderer.

I'm honoured.

I thought of browsing some information but my mind was wandering off. I'm even more annoyed than him. I'm not supposed to think bright. To think of living in the sun, to think about the beautiful feeling of love. The last time I thought of dreaming, I ended up killing 3 girls and having that person dead who cared for me.

Great, I remembered.

"I'm not taking a risk anymore." I jerked my hand loudly and it collided with the laptop.

"Man, that hurts," I wheezed, loudly.

"And the most important thing is I don't even feel emotions. So why should I pretend to give hope? I saved that woman just because I was annoyed by that guy's face. And she wanted a reliable person to take care of her son. And I wanted a programming partner to hack. It's a fair deal. Why the hell is he making this thing complicated." I shouted.

It's not just him.

It's me too.

He is in love with me, and love is complicated.

My subconscious who I praise like hell is annoying me now.

"Shut up. It would have been better if I didn't have this stupid ability to read others' minds and manipulate everyone around. Sound good to just understand everyone around me? Right but it's overwhelming and annoying and stupid when it's wrong."

Also because I just don't know yourself.

Someone knocked and my serious debate stopped so I can't declare the winner yet.

"Hey, I got the information. He is just 2 km away , and some loan sharks are running after him. So I guess he will be dead soon as the debt is high."

"Are we going?" His expression shows no enthusiasm but it's good as he is starting to know his place.

Somehow it felt cold.

No, that's my place.

"Okay, let's go." I responded flatly and started wearing the coat that I had left on the chair.

We got out and were ambling towards the place that's around the empty factory. We were there in no time and in this whole process, Hilmen didn't utter a word about who was a chatterbox normally.

Well, holding grudges is a good way to move forward.

It was never a grudge from the start.

I looked upward and saw Carson. I was able to identify as I remember his photo from the photos Sophie shows to me every day. Golden eyes but dull as hell like someone has lost its shine.

"It's him. Let's go. He shouldn't fall from here, or he will really die." I exclaimed with excitement spouting in my veins as I looked at the factory and surroundings.

"Isn't that what you will do? It's great that our task will be completed by itself. Let's go back." He flatly replied like he wasn't interested at all.

"It's not my style," I said, in a commanding tone.

"Let's go," I said, and started running on the stairs. That was leading to the roof without looking at Hilmen. Unexpectedly this time I could see a hint of concern on Hilmen's face. And he was following me on the stairs at a slower pace than mine.

Maybe I like him and that's pissing me off because every time I do it. I end up losing it.

So I will pretend.

Pretend that I don't care.

When we got up, I saw 3 guys who were dressed like homeless people. And they were pushing Carson from the roof while chuckling as they did so .

"Let's take care of these guys first. I will just directly hit their weak parts so that they lose their consciousness," I explained.

"No need." He responded.

"What?" I asked as I was confused. But before I could figure out anything, he took our JGOD, the Diamatti, the fastest close-range gun. It was metal strapped and was quite handy. And without a flinch of hesitation he killed all 3 of them. Like fuck all three. And where did he get the gun?

I was so stunned that I forgot that Carson fell. Hilmen the sweet cupcake has just killed 3 people.

So this is the place where he spends all his money.

"Why are you in a daze? Isn't that what you do every day?

The difference is that you love to play with everyone's emotions . And I only care about my emotions that all tell the story of you," he said with a calming and dominating tone. And this was the first time I was at a loss for words. He was looking into my eyes without any fear and I was the one avoiding this gaze.

The puppet is rebelling

He isn't the puppet.

Pretend Elena or you will lose him.

We ran towards the end of the roof. And saw he was injured on the head laying aimlessly on the ground. But I could see his eyes were twitching a little, so he wasn't dead yet.

"It's not that high. Let's jump from here. I'm sure the gunshot noise has been heard by people around even if it's a little remote area." Hilmen exclaimed, flatly.

"Also, he is dead. Let's go."

"He isn't. I can see from here. I can save him." I excitedly replied.

"Why would you save him?"

"Because I want to kill him in my way."

"Very well, then let's jump." He chuckled. Knowing damn well what he has suggested is gonna make me shiver.

I was hesitating. Yes I'm very good at manipulating and have already killed a lot of people but I do have a fear. I'm not gonna jump from here. No way.

"Elena, just say you're scared." Hilmen mocked me sarcastically.

"I'm not." I replied abruptly to save my reputation.

"Didn't you say we never know what we could do until we do it?" Hilmen smirked.

"So what," I exhaustively questioned.

"Let's jump!" He chuckled and circled his hand around my waist. And yes; I have a pretty body with all curves.

You're gonna die, bitch.

He grabbed the rope from the other hand. I guess he was trying to look like a hero. It's not that high so no one will die from here. But I have a fear of falling; especially from a high place. And I don't know when he figured that out. I didn't even know until I killed that girl by playing with her fear. When she showed the audacity to jump from the orphanage building, I wasn't able to do the same.

We had a swift landing. And in this whole falling process I kept staring at his face. Well, we all appreciate pretty things. Right?

You were scared and he felt like a saviour.

Umm, yes.

But he was the one who put me here. I swear I will kill him.

I checked Carson's pulse. It was still there. He was bleeding hard and had lost his consciousness so Hilmen carried him to the cabin as fast as possible.

Because of the injury, his cerebrum tissue was slightly injured. And squamous tissues were probably losing their place. His nerves were a little dislocated, and the loss of blood was the result of injury.

I first cleaned his wound with clean water then used a sharp knife which I cleaned before with alcohol. I didn't have a scalper or mask but it's good that other things were easily bought here. And there was no such saying that can't give without physician confirmation.

I used the knife to make the wound a little bigger to be able to clean it well. It took me one hour to sanitise the wound and then wrap it all up.

I got out of the spare room and saw Hilmen sitting like a boss.

"Is he dead?" He asked, looking sharply at me.

"Unfortunately, I'm alive . What can you expect when the best surgeon is there." I proudly smirked.

"It was just a minor surgery." He flatly replied.

"You very well know what it was." I raised my brow.

"Okay..."

"I'm going to my room. You might as well sit with him. Maybe you will fall in love and then don't kill him," he said, annoyingly.

"You are more handsome but I didn't fall in love with you. So why would I fall for him?" I replied, calmly. Because blue fire hurts more than red.

He left without a word flatly dismissing me.

"Great, it is becoming more of a mess," I mumbled.

I sat on the sofa, which was there just in front of the small kitchen.

I started feeling sleepy just after two minutes. I guess I'm on drugs.

Precisely sedatives.

My subconscious corrects me, which is not right at all.

HILMEN POV.

I'm so confused, annoyed, and sad . And I don't even know what! I killed 3 guys straight away? What's happening?

Why I'm losing my mind so much. And I left her with that freak. as if he woke up and tried to do something to her.

Do you really think he can do something for her?

I came back hurriedly but still maintained my posture of dominating . I played for an hour or so and saw Elena drooling on the sofa. She looks so good now that she is quiet, and her demon eyes are shut.

I sat beside her, looking at her gently. And tugged her hair in my fingers as I caressed them. Even though it looks impossible to conquer her. It's really easy to just tie her to the bed but her heart? That's the most difficult part.

I don't know what I will end up doing if it keeps going like this, I thought.

I heard a little movement from the spare room and got up to see.

"He's up," I whispered slowly, moving my lips just to assure myself.

"Yep, you're the best surgeon. Your patient was able to wake up so quickly," I muttered in her ears. Her ears were so soft and small like a rabbit.

She woke up while her hair was all tangled.

"Let's go, he's up," she said before I could tell her.

"How do you know?" I was confused.

"Can you hear while sleeping?" I pleaded confusingly and a little annoyingly because a beautiful moment was just ruined.

"Duh! I did the surgery. I know my charms, of course, I know when he will be up." She grinned.

"Whoa, such a fascinating surgeon who never performs surgeries." I smirked.

"Yep, I learned it to protect myself..." She wanted to say more but it seemed like something stopped her.

I don't think this is the whole story.

We both walked towards the room and opened the door slowly.

Carson was blinking or maybe trying to open his eyes.

"Are you gonna kill him now?" I said sarcastically.

"No, I need to make him love life a little and I'm an expert in it. I will kill him tomorrow just like kids hit the piñata. I will slaughter him." I looked into her eyes, and she was serious.

Once again her demonic way of control over fears made me shocked . But the more I think about her, the more I love her. Weird.