80 The White Phail

Good Morning Skyrim!

Good Morning Jullanar!

Good morning Nefertiti!

Good morning Everyone!

Why are you guys looking at me with those eyes?

What is the matter?

Shouldn't people feel energetic in the morning?

I feel like I have slept for 13 days.

Well, whatever!

I guess I have to go eat now.

It is a very important day.

I will go dungeon delving with Jull over here and it will be a piece of cake.

Or so I thought...




First of all the cave, Forsaken Cave, was well hidden and of course, it would be a perfect hiding place for dirty bandits.

I didn't want to exhaust myself so I left it for the undead.

Only nine 'Bonemen' and the bandits shit themselves and started panicking.

Their boss tried to make a stand but Jullanar took him down with an arrow.

How I love her style!

We are like Robin and Batman, except we are so into each other. I would have taken this girl to a showdown with mighty 'little Jon' but she is still a minor in my eyes. Even though, I don't think I will hold out considering how she always teases and seduces me.

Opss! I spaced out in the middle of a fight!

My bad, my bad!

Jullanar looked at me and was grinning. She already can read my mind this much.


Anyway, let's finish the last bandit?

He was wailing from the arrows that hit his arms and legs.

"Mercy! I beg you... Please, Mercy!"




Bandits need no mercy!

Mercy won't be an option if we switched placed anyway.

Jull was all smiles! She said that the scene of me taking lives is intoxicating to her.

I guess she will need another madness rehab session... later!

"What now?"

"Now we look for valuables before we move on! Remember to always use 'Detect' as if your life depends on it. Because it does!"

Of course, there may be traps from this point onwards.

[A/N: The deadly traps, not the cute ones.]

A few minutes later, we gathered some coins, mead, food, and good weapons.

"Do we use one of the sacks we brought with us?"


As we did just that, I was looking around the place.

I had a hunch and there was a good chance it was true!

"Jull, there are more bandits in the cave ahead!"

She nodded and readied her bow.

I also evoked lighting magic and headed into the cave.

Forsaken Cave was just like Hob's Fall Cave, an icy interior with a chilling atmosphere.

What first met us was a corridor with icy walls and floor, it turned right the went down to a bigger and vaster interior. It was a bit rocky with all the ice and snow in the cave.

Moving ahead! What met us was the sight of an iron door, flanked by two flights of stairs that lead to raised areas. Looking at them, I deduced that they contain nothing of interest.

"Jon, the door is forcefully opened, it's lock is broken."

"Hmm... Interesting! It needs either a good number of men or one hell of a brute to do this damage!"

"What will we do?"

"If we catch up to them, don't engage. They may leave a lot of tracks from this point onwards. I don't want to hinder them at all."

"You don't?"

"Of course! They are working so hard clearing the enemies and taking the traps for our sake, unless we or the dungeon get rid of them." I said will pointing at a few undead and a corpse, "How can your heart bring you to ruin such a beautiful relationship!"

Jull smiled and shook her head.

Moving through the iron door, the place changed from the icy cave to a dusty and ancient Nordic ruin. It was still cold though!

Through the door is a short corridor that leads to a stairwell with a wooden spiral staircase down. At the bottom is a corridor after moving ahead, a couple of turns opened to a wide corridor.

I felt that the place was a bit strange due to some reactions in my 'Detect'.

After walking along the corridor, I found a pressure plate that activates a poison dart trap from a statue like a thing in the front.

There were two dead bandits here!

"See what I am talking about?"

After walking beyond the trap and taking the turn, we cast 'Night Vision' and things go really easier.

We saw a few undead lying around here and there.

Taking turns after turns and passing some traps, we also found some undead that didn't participate in the battle and fought them. Still, they were no match for my hammer, 'Agni-Ra'.

The number of dead bandits passed give, I am afraid my new friends are not doing very well here. Not that I am going to help or anything.

The dungeon was going on until it reached a certain room, where I heard some voices.

They seemed to be around ten bandits but they seemed to be in a tight situation. Another iron door blocked their path and they were having some conflict, some wanted to go back already.

I am truly disappointed.


<Bandit Lv.17>

<Bandit Lv.21>

<Bandit Lv.18>



I signaled to Jull and retreated back.

"So what's the plan?" She asked.


After a while, I was standing further away from the room and had my undead ready.

Not long after, Jull came running from the bandits' direction.

I stood there and waited until she came.

Any time now...

A sound of hustle came and the ten or something bandits started rushing out looking for Jull.

I was preparing an overcharged 'Chain Lightning' and released it once most of them appeared.

The first on got hit died before even knowing it.

The second, the third, the fourth... and the ones survived got killed by the 'Boneman' legion I conjured.

"Anything worth looking at?" I asked.

"I think this mace is enchanted with 'Sun Damage'." Jull said.

"At least the idiots came prepared. Take it."

A 'Sun Fire' weapon is invaluable in undead infested areas.

We went back to the room and started breaking the iron door.

Unlike the game, these doors are a bit hard to open and were meant to seal the tomb. I mean, why would the ones who built it put it for no reason.

I used a 'Frost Atronach' to bring it down. Nothing like it when we talk about being stuff down.

Banishing it, I resummoned my undead legion once again but this time I conjured normal ghosts.

'Spread ahead.' That was the order I gave them. Now that I killed all the bandits I still need some meat shield to uncover the traps and the strong enemies ahead.

Unlike Bonemen who I can only conjure nine of them, ghosts are much easier to control so I ended up conjuring twenty of them.

The area beyond the door was known as 'Forsaken Crypt'. The place I was aiming for from the start.

Once the ghosts went in, traps and undead came out and obliterated them.

I and Jull took our hammer and mace that can deal sun damage and took the role of finishing off the undead.

There were many burial areas inside the crypt. It is a crypt after all.

We were greatly outnumbered like some zombie apocalyptic movie but it was an easy situation to get out of if I used magic. The point of this journey is to enhance my physical power so magic will have to wait for a bit unless it was for safety.

The fight was pretty much done for in a few minutes. It was hard but thrilling. I almost imagined if I had the 'Berserker's skills' from Diablo game, it would have been awesome.

After clearing the area we took a lunch break and moved ahead back again.

An accident happened when Jull stepped on a trap and it spike traps fell from above.

I was a bit far and I had no way of reaching her in time. The only thing I could do was to shout 'FUS!' at her.

She was thankfully blown away by me rather than getting honeycombed by the trap.

We had to take another healing break just after ten minutes of our lunch break. I told her not to get cocky but I guess she does things on her own pace.

After that, we got ready to go again.

If my memory serves me right, the next room will be hard and I have to prepare for a big fight!

The was a door which behind one had to climb some stairs and cross the caged walkway above the previous room we fought the undead horde in. At the end is a wide corridor with several statues on either side.

There is was some undead patrolling this area and some other in an alcove to the right of the second statue on the left.

The fights were easy and we kept advancing until we reached an iron door.

Breaking the door activated a set of swinging blades in the corridor ahead that leads to the final room where all the fun is waiting.

Passing the traps was easy too, but the big fight is ahead.

There were a single sarcophagus, a word wall, and a stairway.

I evoked my new Expert restoration spell and started charging it with all my might.

"Jull, when I tell you that I am ready, go near that sarcophagus. When it blows open, run back here."

"Nn!" She nodded.

A few seconds later, the spell was fully charged.

'System, Magicka!'

<Magicka: 245/520>

Damn! Just this spell took all that?

"Jull, now!"

Jull approached the sarcophagus as I told and its occupant burst forth and attacked.

It was the boss of Forsaken Crypt, Master Alchemist Curalmil.

Just as he came out from his resting place, he looked as ugly as the rest of the draugr but had a high horned helm on his head. This gave out his rank as 'Draugr Overlord'.

'System, this is...'

<Curalmil, Draugr Overlord Lv. 36>

I think I underestimated the dungeon a bit.

Another moment later, four more draugrs came to the room.

I was overcharging the new spell 'Ultraviolent'. A sun spell that can devastate the undead but Curalmil is a bit too powerful for the current me.

Just as I had him in sight, I aimed to the best position I can affect Curalmil. Just as I made the decision, I released the spell.

A missile of sun fire was launched at Curalmil and from the contact, I saw Curalmil getting blown away, but he was not done yet.

"Hurry and finish the rest."

Jull who was in a daze carried her mace and started smashing the undead, they were not as easy as the last ones though.

I was more focused on casting spells. I managed to conjure two 'Dremora Churls'.

"Mortal, we di..."

"Shut up and fight!"

I have no time for their damn ego now, they are the best choice for the plan B in my head.

Curalmil was standing up after it was blown away and it seemed it is pissed.

Just as he came to join the fray, I was ready for him.

"Back to where you came from, mate! FUS RO DAH!"

Yep, that is the best decision right now.

Keep that guy away while finishing off his cronies then gang up on him.

And speaking of which, Jull and the duo Churls finished up their work.

"You two, pin it down."

They only could follow my orders as the jumped on Curalmil like some American Football players. I also joined them and cast 'Bind' on it then jumped on them.

"Jull, take my hammer and smash its damn head. Hurry, we are barely keeping it down."

The situation was too chaotic but it was somehow under control.

Jull took the hammer and did as I said.

A minute later, its resistance was no more.

"Phew! That was intense!" I couldn't help but sigh.

"You are crazy!"

"Look who's speaking!"

Jull was making a tired face but I think it went well.

Now, to claim the rewards.

"Mortal, you..."

"Fuck off!"

I banished the Churls immediately, Dremora and their damn bride.

I have more important business now.

"Where is the package?" I asked.

Jull went to the knapsack she carries and took out a small wooden box.

"Here!" She handed it to me.


I opened the small wooden box with all the care in the world and took out a flask from it.

This flask cost me 100 Golden Septim.

A potent mixture made by a master alchemist.

See where this is going?

Curalmil, the boss of this tomb was a master alchemist and a very crafty one. He was one of the best in his craft.

To open the treasure chamber in his tomb, one needed such a mixture and to pour it in an ancient bowl fixed near to Curalmil's sarcophagus and the treasure chamber will open.

Now, I am pouring the mixture in the bowl.

At the end of the room, there was a word wall, under it was a passage to the treasure room.

Just as I finished pouring the mixture the whole room started to shake as if something heavy was moving.

This was the door to the treasure room.

"Jull, let's go."

She followed as I walked ahead, I didn't neglect to scan the road ahead with 'Detect' just to give myself a peace of mind.

As I entered the room, I saw a tragic scene.

Hundreds of ingredients were here and there but they turned black after hundreds of years in sealing. Some inorganic ingredients were fine though.

But I am not here for gold or ingredients.

I am here for The White Phail.

Curalmil created a very mysterious artifact called 'The White Phail', a flask that can refill its content from nothing. It was made by the first snow that fell on 'The Throat of the World', The famous summit of High Hrothgar, the tallest mountain in the world.

If you give this legendary Phail a drop of health potion, it will make itself full of health potion in one day.

One may think, it just creates one potion a day, what is its use even if it is so wondrous?

Well, why would I make it refill a health potion if it can refill something more... invaluable.

And the thing about creating something from nothing is a hoax, I know it absorbs Magicka and turns it into the potion.

This is what I was after and it was resting there at the end of the room on an altar.


It was broken.

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