Death

I was walking down the road on my way back to my apartment after buying groceries at the local market. There were people going about their business completly ignoring my existence which Triggered my less than pleasant side. with an impassive look plastered on my face I made my way down the road with my mind going into overdrive.

'ugj look at these people ignoring me like I was some common peasant. I mean I know I live in an apartment and don't own a castle with hundreds of rooms to hide my many treasures or the adjacent castle where I house my underlings but my royal aura must have been on full display. right?'

I kept pondering over my majestic appearance while walking down the sidewalk proudly displaying my limited edition Naruto shirt that I got last weak at one of the local college conglomeration of Otakus' anonymous conventions that was being held. It had my favorite sasunaru scene from Naruto's first kiss. I only had to pay an arm and a leg to wretch it out of that crazy fujoshis hands when it was launched off the stage so no worries there.

while robert creed our protagonist was making his way down the street marveling at his Otaku self without a care in the world other than the fact that no one was on their hands and knees praising him to high heaven, an 18 wheeler was speeding down the road in an out of control fashion. A visible smoke trail left as the wheels pounded on the road at a speeds that would kill anyone who wasn't extremely robust and sturdy if it where to fly off and collide with them.

in front me was a little girl wearing a cute dress with naruto plastered on her chest. as a fellow Otaku I couldn't let such a precious girl just starting on her journey of otakuness die without trying to save her. it goes against the will of fire Naruto instilled in me. I jumped in front of her to push her out of the way when the truck passed right by us turning left on its way down the next street. it had completely ignored my heroic moment and bypassed us completely and now I was going to embarrasse myself in front of a cute girl.

the birds were chirping in their derisive laughing tone that only came about when something completely embarrassing befalls our main characters in anime. the little girl who saw me lunging at her had a face of extreme fear plastered on her. she jumped back and reached into her purse. next thing I know there is a pair of scissors being shoved in my face and darkness enveloped me. killed by a Lolita with a pair of scissors was not really the way i was hoping to die. I always thought I would just end up dying of old age sitting in front of a computer while reading fanfiction. oh well. sigh... life sucks and then you die.