Adult Life: Part 3

"I've got to go Kacchan- I have patrol today, I'll be back soon" I said pulling on my boots. Kacchan hands me a satchel with five meals, a few drinks and a bottle of water. "Make sure to eat!" he yelled. I run out into the driveway and through the rainy night, soaked when i get to the bus I'm heavily soaked. I watched the bus drive away and onto the highway.

***

It's five am when I reach home again, and I knock on the door. The door opens and Kacchan is standing there with eyebags under his eyes, and with Kimi in his hands. Shes wide awake and crying so loudly.

I sigh. "Had a tough night?" I said setting down my bag to the side. I carry Kimi into the bedroom and then I walk downstairs, open a cupboard, fill a baby bottle with some milk formula and then I add cold water and warm it up in the microwave.

The microwave dings and I grab hold of the bottle, walked upstairs, sat down besides her and then I feed her in my arms.

I grab her pink pacifier after, and placed it onto the mouth, then covered her in a blanket. "Simple as Kacchan" I said. "Go sleep, I need to take a shower" I said before leaving to the bathroom. I turn on the shower and turn it to cold and sigh in relief as I look up at the skyroof.

Thunder crashes. I scrub my body clean. I look down my body. Ugly scars are scattered everywhere. I tell myself they're not ugly, it was a battle with these. I finish the shower and turn off the water and change into my PJs.

I walk out into the bedroom, Kacchan is still up. He's waiting for me. Then as though a plug is removed in my body I collapse into tears.

He gets up almost immediately, and then pulls me into a hug, burying my face in his arms hidding my tear stained face. "I-I fucking hate myself for being broken at this point Kacchan" I said. He hugs me tightly.

"Pull yourself together and fight this shit, I'm on your side" he said, letting me go. I nod and then I wipe my face and go downstairs to sit in my reading nook.

Kacchan follows me and then I sit down in the reading nook and pull out my book "Girl In Pieces" and pull a blanket ontop of my body, Kacchan lays down in my lap.

I turn my phone on, and presses play on "I Found You" by Amber Run. I pull the house curtains shut, then the curtains of the nook shut.

I spend hours stuck in this book. I get at once, moving slowly not to wake Kacchan up, I walk upstairs.

It was time. Time to truly fly. I shut the bathroom door, and block it with a chair, then pull out a cylinder of sleeping pills. I eat three. The world slowly dozed off and then I fell asleep.

I wake up in a horrible state, in a hospital bed with a monitor showing my very slow pulse. I heard yelling and chattering from outside my ward. My heart is beating slower then usual. The door bangs open. My pulse is slowly creeping upwards.

Kacchan runs into the ward. He sweeps me up in a tight hug. "You were found unconcious on the bathroom floor" he said. I sat there silent. He sits down, grabbed hold of my thighs and pulled me close before kissing me.

He deepens the kiss, then in a swift move he grabs hold hands pushes them behind, and pulls me closer. I break the kiss in a panic to breathe and then I say "This is an HOSPITAL!!" I said.

He doesn't care and continues kissing me. Then he moves down my neck and starts kissing it. I sqiurm. "Give in already" he said.

I kick him and it pushes him back into reality. "Done? You idiot, we're at a hospital, not a fucking motel" I said.