So we’re just going to ignore this, okay?

Mark

So, Jamie taught me that if you click on the magnifying glass icon, you can do a search on videos related to the Kate-Popvaganza catastrophe and can even search by hashtag. I typed in mine and Kate's names with my thumbs. Video upon video upon video popped out. Different angles of the scene of the crime. Fake subs flying on top of our heads.

Kate is never going to talk to me again. Ever.

One video of Missy being all obvious and gawking at us. Then trying to regain her composure and waving at the fans. Missy, you traitor.

"Kate is never going to talk to me again," I groaned, stretching out on Jamie's couch, but still holding Jamie's phone in front of my face. "Ever."

"What rank is your trend now?" Jamie asked, calmly, opening his second can of beer. I was already halfway through my third. We agreed to keep our count to three each, Jamie was counting calories again and I had a shoot tomorrow.

"Still 7," I rolled my eyes and went back to the magnifying glass icon. A new video where someone pasted a cartoon drawing of a bull on my head, flames firing out of its nose and ears right before Rob turns to see me. The cartoon head made the way Rob jump back from me funny and I had to laugh despite the fact that it's the end of the world.

"Do you know yet if Kate or the Goddess Athena people are aware of this and planning to do anything besides ignore it?" Jamie asked, proving again that he was the smartest guy I knew. When we started out, we or our managers would immediately text each other whenever we got into this kind of mess, just to agree what to tell the public. It used to be really intense back in the day, but in recent years it mellowed down to just a "So we're just going to ignore this, okay?" courtesy text.

I pulled down the notification tab. "Nobody has contacted me yet," I said.

"Ditz, of course not, that's my phone," Jamie snorted. "Check yours."

"Oh shit, yeah." I fished for my phone from my back pocket. Ten missed calls from Ned, a message from Ned saying, "Don't go online for the next few days, talked to Darlene of GA and we agreed to ignore this. You are so dead, btw." A missed call from my mom, but it's too late right now to call her back.

Nothing from Kate. Of course.

I picked up Jamie's phone again and deftly entered his passcode. He saw this and whined, "What are you doing now?"

Jamie's phone started ringing. "You have a call," I grunted. "The number isn't saved on your phone, can we drop it?"

"Yes, but give my phone back already."

"Wait, one last thing," I whined, rejecting the call. I scrolled through Jamie's social media friends list to look for Kate's personal account.

Jamie picked up my phone and opened the radio app. The default station was playing the latest PYD hit. He changed the channel immediately. I don't even use that app, so I peered at him to check what he was doing. He stopped at one station playing a familiar tune: Hunger by Boy Next Door.

Ah, there she is. Her profile photo was a chibi fan art of her eating fried chicken. It was adorable.

~

You were quite different

And I knew you would be

That special something

Others can only dream of

You know you have it

And I know you have it too

~

"Why are we listening to this, Jame?" I asked. We don't usually listen to our own songs on the radio.

"It's a great song," he shrugged. "I like this band."

"Tsss," I had to grin.

As I listened to myself rap some really slick pick up lines, I scrolled through Kate's page. No updates since morning, a 24-hour story share of the Popvaganza poster and a "See y'all later! 💖💖💖" accompanying it. Her last post was a photo of her and Tiffany hugging at some party. Time stamp: two days ago. I checked her online status in the messages platform: Last online at 4PM yesterday.

So she probably has no clue.

I clicked on her Tagged tab. Video upon video upon video of our little Popvaganza moment. I withered. I'm so dead when she comes back online.

~

Can you see my eyes on you

My eyes on you

Can you see this hunger, you know it's real

Don't hide, show me how you feel

~

My eyes glazed over for a moment. That line always reminds me of Antonia and the scene in our video where she pushes me down on a rock (we filmed at a waterfall) and straddles me. Clothes wet, I had to keep my body upright and held her back up so that she wouldn't fall. I had to constantly look at her face because I could see through her shirt, actually I could see everything. In the video, I looked like I wanted her badly. That was the realest acting I had ever done in my life.

Jamie suddenly changed the channel, abruptly pulling me out of my reverie. In doing so, I double tapped on the photo of Kate and Tiffany and a heart blossomed on the screen. "Shit!" I exclaimed. "I liked Kate's post."

Jamie didn't look up from my phone. "You what?"

"I liked a photo of Kate and Tiffany hugging each other that she posted! How do I undo this?"

"Relax, moron," Jamie rolled his eyes. "_I_ liked that post, that's my phone. Don't worry about it." As I started breathing again, he added, "Like or comment on something else and I'll break your legs."

He settled on a channel hosting a talk show, a young girl was excitedly giggling. Then Steve's smooth voice responded. Ah, it's Steve's midnight show.

A message popped up on Jamie's screen. "You have a text," I said, swiping it up offscreen.

"Who from?"

"I don't know, but wants you to meet him for a jacket." I scrolled through Kate's posts. Either photo shoot outtakes, official Goddess Athena publicity images, or candids with the other girls. Behind the scenes selfies with co-stars. This one's gay. This one, too. That one, too.

"Did they leave a name?"

"I dunno, I didn't open the thing, only read half of it." I looked up at him, who was studying his beer can with interest. "Do you need to reply right away?"

He shook his head. "It's nothing."

I shrugged and opened the message platform again to check out Jamie's chat history with Kate.

"...I'm really sorry to ask, but I need to know, since you're obviously not a virgin, when was your first time and did you like it?"

Jamie and I sat straight up and stared at each other. We watched each other's eyes widen for three seconds, listening to Steve start coughing for a split second before advising us that they were going on a break. Jamie and I burst into laughter, falling onto the floor and rolling around, clapping our hands. There were tears in our eyes, and we couldn't stop.