For as long as Joshua could remember, he wanted to help people. This want— this need to help people ultimately came from his mother. Beverly Gilbert had such a welcoming aura to her that all that met her liked her. To those that knew her, she was a trusted advisor, a caring friend, and a kind soul. Joshua truly believed that she was perfect, and he was able to call her "mother"?
When he was younger, it seemed like his family was the picture-perfect representation of the nuclear family. A father, a mother, and an only son. They all lived in perfect suburbia. White-picket fence and all.
Until one day, his mother got a diagnosis that shattered the family's whole world. They had to say goodbye to their nice little home. His father, Aaron Gilbert, had to take on multiple jobs to help support his sick wife and the mother of his child.
Even through her sickness, she continued to nurture her son to the best of her ability. She continued to teach her son the moral lessons that she learnt from her parents and even started to teach her son about developing his connection to her Christian faith. Though he was only five years old then, and she didn't have any extravagant expectations, she wanted to make sure that he at least learned what the Christian faith was about — even if it was only the simplistic, Sunday-school version of it.
His mother had grown up in a Christian family, while his dad was not religious. His grandparents had originally been against their marriage because of his father's atheism, but after they spent time with him and witnessed the love that the couple shared, they accepted him into the family.
Joshua remembered, very vaguely, that his whole family used to go to church every Sunday. Even though his father didn't believe any of what was being preached, he enjoyed spending that time with his wife. It was part of a healthy routine in their lives.
In the season after Beverly was diagnosed with her cancer, Aaron leaned into relying on the faith his wife believed in. Cancer wore her down over the years as she battled it. Who knows how much money was spent on the treatment? Though he believed in the science of medicine, nothing seemed to help his wife's condition, so he turned to faith.
For a long time during his wife's sickness, Aaron prayed to the god his wife believed in, begging for her cancer to be defeated. Surely, if the benevolent and omnipotent god that the pastors preached about each Sunday existed, looking after his beloved wife would be an easy miracle to do, right? Surely, God would have taken this ripe opportunity to show his grace to convince Aaron of his existence, right?
The day that Beverly died continued to haunt the Gilbert family for years.
***
Joshua looked at the date in the corner of his computer screen. 16th of April. It's been twenty-three years since his mother died.
I'm sorry you didn't get to see me grow up, he thought solemnly.
He looked around at the other cubicles and saw that nobody was around, which was a rare occurrence. He picked up his phone and scrolled through his contacts. He stopped when he saw the one he was looking for.
"Aaron Gilbert".
His breath got caught in his throat as his thumb hovered over the name. He took a slow, deep breath to try and calm himself and pressed the screen lightly. The ringing tone sounded as he pressed the phone against his ear.
Multiple rings sounded. His dad never set up a voicemail message, so the phone just continued to ring for as long as Joshua kept it ringing.
On the fourteenth ring, just as Joshua was about to give up on the call, Aaron picked up but didn't say a word.
After a moment, Joshua decided to kickstart the conversation. Somehow.
"H-hey dad, it's Josh…" Joshua said in a soft, meek voice.
The Gilbert patriarch didn't reply, though Joshua could hear the soft sound of his breathing on the other end.
"I was just calling to say that I'm not going to be able to come and," Joshua breathed in before continuing, "and visit mum today because of work, but I was wondering if you would like to catch up when I come up there tomorrow?"
A heavy silence fell as Joshua waited for his father's reply.
"You don't have to do that," the deep, grumble of his father's voice surprised Joshua.
"D-do what?"
"I'm okay Josh, you don't have to check up on me every year," Aaron sighed as he explained, "you don't have to look after me, I'm doing fine."
Josh tried so desperately to think up something to say, but nothing came.
"I think it's best if we just keep doing what we're doing and stay out of each other's business, especially today," Aaron continued, "live well Josh."
Then Aaron hung up.
Joshua let out a shaky breath and slumped his head down onto his desk with a louder thump than he intended to. His father had been extra devastating this year. Sure, Joshua had not been able to visit his mother's grave for the past three years on the anniversary of her death, but he was so close to getting his law licence then. He had to focus.
He straightened and looked around at the other cubicles and he realised that they had been empty for way too long now. He knew that some of the other first-year recruits were out doing gopher work for their seniors, but not all had been assigned cases yet. So where were the others?
He stood up and tucked his chair under his desk. After a quick stretch, he started to look for some of the other first years. He knew for sure that Buggsy and Paul should still be in the office. Like him, they hadn't finished their pro bono quotas yet, so they should still be working at the office.
He checked the office kitchen first since he knew that Paul loved to snack, but they weren't there.
Madison and Madison, the law firm they worked at, also had an extensive staff relaxation area that Buggsy was known to frequent whenever he got the chance, yet he couldn't find the man there either.
On a whim, he decided to head near the entrance lobby of the building the firm was based when he heard a woman's voice rising over the sounds of hundreds of people entering and exiting the building.
"Please, I'm begging you. Surely there's someone I can speak to!" the woman begged the receptionist. The poor girl a decade younger than him struggled to get the older woman to settle down and stop making a scene.
Joshua recognised the two figures that hid behind a corner just out of sight of the lobby, whispering feverishly at the scene that slowly got more and more out of control.
"What's happening?" Joshua whispered loudly right behind them after he snuck up to the pair. They both jumped, synchronised, and whined about him scaring them.
Ben "Buggsy" Wengold, the short and skinny 35-year-old dabbed his slightly sweaty forehead with his tie. His nickname came from a story about his high-school pet crickets that he inadvertently revealed during their orientation days at the firm drinking with some of the second and third-year lawyers. He had been extremely drunk at the time.
"Why did you have to scare me like that?" Buggsy said as he finished dabbing his face.
"You know I have a weak heart, you shouldn't do that," Paul groaned to Joshua next to him.
Paul Newton was practically a giant compared to his friend next to him. Even Joshua looked short next to the man, and he had the width of two healthy middle-aged men to boot. Joshua heard that he had to have his clothing personally tailored since he was so big. Paul was very smart and friendly though, and everyone seemed to like him at the firm. That's probably why everybody called him by his name instead of a slightly mean nickname.
Once the pair settled, they motioned to Joshua to peek around the corner.
"It's that old lady that's been going around the different law firms," Buggsy explained.
"Why's that?" Joshua asked.
"She's trying to get someone to take up her case — her son died in a workplace accident, and she claims it was because of negligence," Paul said as he grabbed a small plastic packet of chocolate, "but she's got no money, so she's been going to different law firms."
"So why are you guys just hiding here? Don't you both have to finish your pro bono quota as part of the orientation tasks?" Joshua asked them.
Buggsy tutted and looked back at him, "bro, it's not like you've finished the quota either, and besides…pretty sure it's not a good idea to take up her case. Especially as a pro bono."
Joshua raised his eyebrow, "oh? Because…?"
"Her son worked for Gould Constructions bro!" Buggsy said as he lightly slapped Joshua's arm, "you know who Henry Gould is, right? Well, man's got so much money he can afford whatever defence team he wants. No way first-year recruits like us can handle going against him."
Joshua watched the old woman continue to beg the receptionist to allow her entry. Joshua could see the desperation in her eyes. He became a lawyer to be able to help people, and there was someone right there that looked like they needed help.
He sighed before he stepped forward out of the cover of the corner.
"Where are you going?" Paul asked behind him.
He turned around and said, "well, someone should at least listen to her claim, right?"
"Are you crazy?" Buggsy retorted with a scoff.
He shrugged and made his way over to the receptionist's desk.
Maybe, he thought, maybe he is crazy.
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