Let It Be: Rose

It's only been a week since the play, but things are different already. For starters, Penny and AJ are on the rocks. One minute they were fine, and then the next they needed space. They're still officially together, but from the looks of things I'm not sure it'll last much longer.

Even worse, Matt's been very distant from everyone. He's quiet, and spends all of his free time practicing.

Weirdest thing as of late is seeing Angie spend all of her time with this British guy. If you catch one of them in the hallway, then you know that the other's close by.

They're always leaving together in his car after school. I'll say that I've seen her really laugh with him, and despite the leather jacket he doesn't strike me as a troublemaker. Whatever the case may be, things are definitely...different.

Another change is that our washer gave out, so for now we go to the laundromat downtown, which is where I'm currently spending my time.

Grandma agreed to take me to the trails after I help her. I'm hoping to find some inspiration for the contest there, but we've stayed longer than I thought we would.

I'm starving, and the sight of a dozen machines spinning in soapy circles is putting me under hypnosis. I've read gossip magazines, watched soap operas, and raided the low variety vending machines. I'm ready to leave.

Grandma calls me to help fold a load. I stop wasting away on the bench, stretch, and give her a hand. My Nikon dangles from my neck. I'm falling behind even though grandma's tuned into her soap opera. She's already got two stacks done.

I pick up the pace, tackling a few stacks when a family walks in. Their daughter is what makes them stand out.

The little girl is wearing a baggy white jumpsuit, and red converse sneakers. Swallowing her head is a space helmet.

She readjusts the slipping helmet then hops inside of a dryer. Her legs dangle from the edge. She reads from the space magazine that she's been toting under her arm.

"Macy, get down from there!" Her mother warns.

She bargains. "One more paragraph."

A spark of inspiration hits. I see myself, Ben, his mother, and Cindy. Anyone who's ever had a dream. This is where it starts. As a child.

I capture the moment with my camera before she hops down. I've got my picture.

I smile. I guess that's the beauty in inspiration. You don't go looking for it, it comes to you.

~

Penny asks to come over. Dinner is still cooking when she arrives, and the delicious smell consumes the house.

We sit on the floor of my bedroom, staring at each other. Her eyes tell me a mouthful. It's obvious that she's hiding something, and when the silence continues for too long, I finally crack.

"I know we're having fun here, but would you mind if we didn't?"

"If I talk, then it'll be real."

I unwrap a blow pop, noticing something strange. "Are you wearing flats? Now I know something's wrong."

She rubs her eyebrows. "I'm being serious, Rose."

"So am I." When my smile isn't returned, I wind it back. "You're right, sorry. What's bothering you?"

Her ringless fingers play with my carpet. "Well...I-uh. I think I cheated on AJ."

I choke on my candy, beating my chest for air. Embarrassment wears down her face.

"You what?!"

"I know."

Her being so pitiful makes me dial it back. I'm sure she feels awful enough. "How do you think that you cheated? Isn't that something you would know?"

"Well, I was kissed by someone. They came onto me, and when I started thinking straight, I stopped it."

"That must've been some kiss. Who's the guy?"

She tightly presses her lips, taking a moment to answer. "Matt."

My jaw probably resembles the Scream mask. I'm at a loss for words until my brain clicks in again. "Well, okay."

She buries her head between her knees. "I knoooooww! I didn't say anything to AJ, because Matt said he didn't remember. I figured it wasn't worth mentioning but then-get this." She lifts her head, leaning closer. "Apparently, he's had a crush on me for a while."

I bite my lips to stifle a laugh, but it doesn't work.

She's taken aback by my reaction.

"Penny, duh!" Her glare doesn't stop me from rolling on the floor.

"You knew?!"

"Who didn't?"

"Me, Rose! Why wouldn't you tell me something like that?"

I get out the last laugh, and sit up. "Matt didn't want me to. I couldn't choose between you guys, so I figured it would play itself out."

She seems to understand. "What do I do?"

It took me a while, but I finally see what she's getting at. "That's a question that you have to ask yourself. I can't tell you what you want."

"I don't know what I want."

"Everyone knows what they want. The problem is that they also know what everyone else wants."

She nods. "Matt won't talk to me, and I feel like a liar around AJ."

"Is that why you two haven't been getting along? Penny, he deserves to know. If you explain that you didn't initiate anything, then I'm sure he'll understand. If he doesn't then at least it's his choice."

"What if he makes me choose?"

I've watched movies about love triangles, but they seem to only be fun in film. It's more complicated in reality.

"Go with your gut."

"Matt already hates me, and so will AJ."

"Matt couldn't hate you if he tried."

She laughs dryly. "Well, he's trying."

"Just drop the bomb, and move from there."

She stares curiously. "When did he first tell you?"

"I overheard him talking to some kid about you. He said you were super cool, and I knew enough middle school boy language to translate what that meant." I laugh. "I teased him, only half expecting him to spill his guts. He told me not to tell you. I thought it was sweet, so I lied about being sick one day, so that you two could hang out alone."

This surprises her. "You weren't really sick? Did he know?"

"No and no. It didn't help move anything along, though." I shrug. "But, I suppose everything has its time."

"Yeah... maybe it does."

"You ready to eat?"

She stands to her feet with a small smile, joining grandma and I for dinner.