Chapter 14

As Erik fell on the ground, he looked at my face with surprising, shocking expression on his face and for mere second I notice anger too but soon it turned in guilt and sorry too. On the other hand, I am feeling, anger, irritation, frustration, concerned and may be all these feeling, increasing my body temperature as I am feeling wired type of fire in me.

I stand up as soon as possible, run away from there. Though I can hear Erik shouting my name who is running behind me but I ignored it and run as fast as possible. I reach to school terrace, took deep breaths and after relaxing a bit I kept my hand on my mouth, then I shout. This is what I does every time whenever I have a full bucket of emotions in me, because I have no idea how to express them so, rather than choosing to fight back I choose to flight.

Here, at the terrace what all I thought within myself and talk to myself is that

Siya: How dare he to touch or drag me, whenever he want? His possessiveness is so suffocating, with what he said, does he trying to say that I cannot be with my other friends just because he don't like it? He has loss his father plus not close to anyone else, so may be he needs me for comfort but why the hell he needs me only. I do have helped anyone who, needed me, so why I am too much thinking about it now? I just wish I could share this information with someone.

With these thoughts keep running in my mind, I reached the school gate and here I see Erik standing at the cab stand leaning to a pale and as soon as I crossed the gate and move outside we had an eye contact. Rather then getting close to him, I choose to walk for some more time as I wanted to clear my mind and he started following me for sometime but soon he catch up with me.

He is walking so, close to me that our fingers touching and I am feeling uncomfortable to touch. So, I kept my both hand in the jeans pocket. Neither I said a single word nor he, we just kept walking. I think we may have walked around 1 km and to be honest I am just walking in a daze so, I don't know that are where we are, but my mind come to a conclusion, I wanted to minimize his pain and for that I can do anything.

Siya: I think we should go home.

Erik: Are you okay?

Siya: yeah. Let's go.

Erik: Okay.

We both called for our cabs. As we are both waiting for it, Erik initiated the conversation.

Erik: When I was five years old, my father left both me and my mother saying that he can't do this anymore and he love someone else. As I was small I don't know what to say or do or simply understand what is happening. I just go near him and asked him to bring my chocolate when he come next, to this my mom cried a bit don't know why but he just leaved and never come back and neither did my chocolate come.

Siya: (Sadly, sympathy but don't know what to say) ohh okay.

Erik: (looking at distance, may be lost in a memory) Then as I grew up, I used to ask my mother about my dad and she always told me he is busy, so he won't be coming back soon. I used to thought it was a truth, soon we shift to grand mom's house and there no one actually like me and to be honest I don't know the reason at that time. I remember, it was my 16th birthday and at that time I asked them about my father and this time grand mom said something which shocked and break me apart..

(Erik conversation with her grand mother in the past)

Erik: (to everyone) Where is dad he didn't come to wish me and or meet me?

Grand mom: He left you and your mother behind and living with an another women and it just all happened because you born accidentally. He never loved you and he also left your mother because of you and we all hate you.

(Back to present)

Erik: I don't know what to do at that time I run into the room lock it from inside and I cried for the first and last time by keeping a hand over my mouth. I started to learn how to be strong, rude, emotionless and arrogant.

Siya: ohh okay (a horn sound come from my side). I think I should leave now as my cab is here.

For a brief second I look in Erik eyes but he is no longer here with me I guess as he seem to be lost in a old memory and this make me realize how said how concerned and sad I am for him. I never liked to see someone in pain, sad or hurt and I always stand with or around with them till the time, they don't learn to laugh and be happy. So, I have decided I would do anything to make him smile or laugh one day.

Siya: (I put one of my hand on his shoulder and put a bit of pressure on it) I am leaving, the cab is here.

Erik: (he finally look at me and nod his head slightly) yeah sure.

I left him there only and I sit in the cab which start moving towards my home. During the whole journey I kept on thinking, how said his life is and may be from tomorrow I can show him what truly happiness is.

Next day when after my practice when I met him, I try to start our friendship from the fresh and for this I guess I have to break one of my wall i.e. to initiate a conversation, though this quite very difficult for me. But for a second I close my eyes, took a deep breath and remember my aim is make him smile or laugh. This I have to do at any cost and with this I open my eyes and initiated the conversation.

Siya: hey

Erik: hey

Siya: how are you doing today?

Erik: good. And you?

Siya: good too.

And after this we don't spoke for a while, I got stuck in what to ask next.

Siya: umm do you like hot chocolate or cold coffee? (inside of my mind I am like seriously)

Erik: cold coffee. And you?

Siya: hot chocolate

Again here comes silence between us. Though in my mind it seems like tsunami of thoughts is coming which is basically related to what to ask and what not to ask. But to my comfort Erik initiated the conversation.

Erik: have you ever tried drinking hard drinks?

Siya: no

Erik: I am into drugs and drinking from past two years, though I know it's illegal but it feels very peaceful and relaxing. I go to farmhouse with my friends and do it.

Siya: ohh okay

Like this we spend a month by talking to each other, and tried to know more about each other. Though I am the only one knowing him better and what he know about me is only lie. As I can't trust him as I am not comfortable with him but I have to make him smile or laugh so, I have to know him better first.

And I never leave my friends completely for him, I used to hang out with them secretly sometime and when he is not in the school, I used to took advantage of that time too.