A lot of people in our lives exist because we are holding to them. And in my case, I have none because the moment I left home, I let go all of them. I didn't fight and force them to stay on my side. I set aside my fear of being alone and let go all of them.
I stop trying to make an effort to make them stay. Perhaps, that was my defense mechanism. I'm so tired of expecting from other people just because I did my very best for them hoping that they will also did the same thing, but they didn't.
Seviro, he came to my life and stay with me even though I didn't make him nor ask him. But he only stay enough time to shaken me, to lure me in a trap and then disappoint me afterwards. I already know that I shouldn't attach myself to something that is only temporary, but I still did although I already escape the oblivion.