Falling Down: Mr. Pipe

And he found a new jawbone of an ass, and put forth his hand, and took it, and slew a thousand men therewith. Fact: you can make a murder tool out of anything.

Neon Judges 15:15

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>>> [RE: POI-0. NEW EVENT RECORDED.]

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Hitomi was staring at the pipe in her hands with open confusion.

It was a long, slender piece of grey metal. She thought it might be steel because it was lighter than it looked, but still had a discernible solidness to it. Aluminum wouldn't feel like this. And she'd barely be able to lift actual lead.

It was painted grey, she realized, because at certain points she could see the paint flecking off around tiny red rust stains, but it was only mottled in this way in a few places. It was made of two pieces: one long and slender, and then a U-bend screwed on the end.

Honestly it looked like a giant candy-cane. Although, candy-canes couldn't basically cave in a guy's skull, she thought distractedly.

"Hey, Heetomi!" Hailey said, gently pulling at her shoulder.

Josh had reached down and picked up the mugger's gun, she noticed. Hailey was standing in front of her trying to talk to her.

"Hey, are you OK, Heetomi? Hey. Hello?" A hand was waved in front of her face.

She blinked, then blinked again, and looked up from the pipe laying across her palm and up at Hailey, whose brown hair was hanging over her, almost tickling her forehead (how was she so tall?).

"U-uhm, I'm OK. Is, is he..."

Josh gave the body a disgusted look. "Yeah... hey, don't worry about him. He got what was coming to him. Piece of shit." Then paused, "Shit!", he said, looking around quickly. His eyes were scanning the ground and he paced around the edges of the alley.

Hailey turned her head around partially but was still holding onto Hitomi's shoulders as to help steady her. "What, honey? What's wrong?"

"They took our wallets."

She cursed. "Well, keep the gun, right? How full is the clip?"

Hailey let go of Hitomi to talk to Josh, walking up next to him to observe what he was doing, curious about their ammo situation. He quickly cleared the top chamber of the gun and snatched a bullet out, then ejected the clip and eyed it carefully. Hitomi was fascinated too, letting the pipe droop down in one hand to her side as she watched him expertly balance the clip between two fingers.

"Bit top heavy. Half full, maybe?" He slotted the bullet back into the clip and inserted it into the the gun, then flicked a little switch on its side.

Hitomi asked the obvious, just because she still couldn't quite believe it.

"It was a real gun? Real bullets?"

Josh chuckled. "Oh yeah, a Glock. 9mm."

Hailey followed up, "Do you know what a semi-auto is, Heetomi?"

No. No she did not. The closest thing she could relate it to was her little brother's Airsoft gun collection, but those were all rifle-styled guns. She shook her head bashfully. American's loved their guns, but she'd better learn from them if she wanted to survive in all the chaos, right?

"It means they can shoot just by pulling the trigger: no re-cocking. Criminals love 'em. Well, I mean, so do I - I'm not a criminal," he said awkwardly, trailing off.

Hailey was pointing to the street outside, "Put it away honey and let's get out of here. We're totally fubar now. Heetomi, no offense, but we're gonna need to get you to that embassy ASAP. Things are getting worse around here and we don't even have cash now."

"Yeah," Josh said, assessing what to do after they had dropped of Hitomi, "Well, she's priority one, we can't just ditch her now that we've brought her this far."

She didn't understand all the things they just said, but it sounded like they were still willing to help her. Thank goodness.

Wait.

"Oh! Oh! I still have money! Do you need any? I am so sorry I've put you through so much trouble," Hitomi set the pipe down and started rifling through her purse. Pulling out a stack of $5 and $10 bills that she kept for emergencies (well, snacks, mostly).

Hailey looked askance at Josh, who paused for a second, considering it.

"Um, we wouldn't ever normally..." the American girl started to say, and Josh helped her finish it.

"Yeah this is totally weird, but, yeah, it's like the apocalypse out here. We may really need it, if you can spare some, yeah, well, yeah. We'll pay you back, obviously."

Hitomi eagerly pushed about forty dollars in $10 bills into Hailey's hands. "No no! I'm so glad I can contribute and help! Here, let me give you my card."

She fished around in her bag again, while Hailey looked at the crisp bills in her hand, then folded and tucked them away into her back pocket. "She has a card?" Josh whispered to her, looking confused.

Yes, Hitomi had a card! Just like a real business card: with her name helpfully spelled out in English on one side and Japanese on the other, with her school's contact info and her phone number.

She handed it to Hailey with two hands and bowed instinctively.

Hailey took it gracefully but Josh snatched it away.

"Hitomi Hisakawa. Hi-to-mi. Ohhhh, gotcha. Sorry, honey, it's Hitomi not Heetomi." He read and corrected Hailey (and himself).

Hitomi was still bowing, her hands having dropped to her sides.

"Um, Hitomi?" Hailey asked.

She didn't answer.

"H-Hitomi?" she moved closer, worried.

Hailey realized she could hear slight sniffling, and bent down, looking up at Hitomi's face. Her eyes were pinched shut tightly, brimmed with tears, and a little trail had already started winding its way down one cheek.

"Hey, hey!" Hailey said, grasping Hitomi's forearms kindly, "It's OK, hey, shush, hey..."

Hitomi couldn't help it. After everything that had happened, with the baby, and the poor mother who had died in the car, and then the crazy lady, and now the muggers - the one she had killed somehow, she was finally just able to let herself be overwhelmed.

"I-I'm sorry," she sniffed, trying to wipe at one eye with her sweater sleeve.

"Honey, go guard the entrance, we might be a second," Hailey said to Josh, who nodded and walked to the edge of the alley, staying just inside enough not to be exposed on the street.

"Are you OK? We need to keep moving, it's dangerous here and we want to get you to where you'll be safe. OK?"

Hitomi nodded, trying to straighten herself back up. She wiped away the tears and tried to pull herself together as much as possible. Hailey was hugging her shoulder from the side.

"OK, hey, you're doing great. Just don't think about..." she stopped herself, turning Hitomi away from the corpse.

"Um, Ms. Hailey?" she said, suddenly uncomfortable.

"Yeah?"

"I kinda... need to, uh," she gestured helplessly at the area behind the dumpster. Hailey snorted, briefly, but smiled and urged her to go. "No problem, we'll wait for you right here. No one's coming in to get the jump on us again."

And thankfully no one did. Hitomi was able to do her business behind the dumpster the same way Hailey had, only smudging her skirt a little bit on the filthy ground.

She started to walk out of the alley when Hailey stopped her.

"Um, Hitomi, you don't need the, uh, pipe, anymore."

Pipe?

She looked down at her left hand.

What!?

She was holding the pipe again!

"I put it down, though!"

Josh laughed, "Yeah, but you picked it back up. Look, we don't want to look too conspicuous, we're close to Massachusetts Street and all the embassies. We don't want to freak out any cops." Said the man with a bulge above his waistline and under his shirt, obliviously.

"No, I mean, I put it down. I don't know why I'm holding it."

Hailey smiled softly, "We understand if it feels like you need it for protection, but I'm not sure..."

Flicker.

Hitomi had just dropped the pipe in front of them both.

Hitomi was now holding the pipe again.

"Oh day-umm!! It's that thing again!" Josh said, excitedly.

Hailey clicked her tongue, "Wow. I could almost see it that time. Do it again!"

Hitomi, now living in a brand new world of disbelief, raised the pipe in front of her, holding it out very carefully so everyone could see gravity do its job, and let go.

The pipe hit the ground with a clang-clanging sound.

They stared at it.

Hitomi looked up, then took a step forward.

Suddenly Hitomi had the pipe in her left hand again, and she could swear she saw the briefest flicker of herself walk forwards, past her body, holding nothing.

"You were able to put it down though, before," Hailey observed.

"Can I see that?" asked Josh.

She offered it to him, and he was able to grab a hold of it without any problem.

"Um. Maybe it's a magic pipe?" Hailey laughed, looking at them like they were all crazy.

Hitomi tried to take another step out of the alley onto the street, when suddenly Josh let out a yelp and she found herself holding the pipe in her left hand again.

"Ow!" he said, shaking his wrist, "Crap! What just -, whoa. Honey, look, she has the pipe again!"

Hailey was just gobsmacked, then gently reached out and very carefully took Hitomi's improvised weapon away from her, hefting it carefully in her own palms. She suddenly swung it extremely hard at Hitomi, who let out a sharp scream and jumped back.

The pipe swished by, completely missing her. Hailey had pulled the pipe back before it could connect with her body, and was already yelling, "Oh god I'm sorry! Sorry! I thought, ahhh, I don't know what I thought! I was just testing, I'm so sorry!"

Hitomi was looking at her with panic, and started to work her way out the alley a few feet to the side of Hailey.

Without warning she felt the flicker again.

Hitomi was standing right next to Hailey, who was holding her wrist in pain, and, sure enough, Hitomi's left hand clutched the pipe with a very sure grip this time.

"Um," she said.

"Whoa," Josh said.

"I'm starting to think it's not the pipe that's magic," Hailey said, holding her wrist which looked like it had just been twisted awkwardly, "And, sorry, again, by the way. I thought maybe you had a magic power that stopped you from being hurt and that was really dumb, I'm sorry Hitomi."

Hitomi understood that Hailey wasn't really trying to hurt her, and nodded.

"It's OK, but, um, I don't think I can put the pipe down. I keep trying. It keeps coming back."

Josh agreed. "Yeah, no, hold onto it."

"Well, we should try to keep going, maybe there's a reason you can't leave it behind. You obviously have something... different... happening to you, it might be happening to other people too. We should all be careful." Hailey wanted to get out of there, it was getting later in the day and they needed as much sunlight as they could get.

"OK," Hitomi concurred, and tested walking out of the alley with the pipe swinging freely in her left hand, back and forth with her stride.

It hadn't disappeared yet, and yep, no flickers.

The trio turned at the corner of the alley entrance and got back on the main street, and Hailey mused: "Man, it's almost like you've got a legendary weapon from one of those video games, Hitomi."

"Oh, you play those kind of games, Ms. Hailey?"

Hailey gave some side-eye to Josh, and said, "Well, somebody has to. Josh just plays Call of Duty all day, isn't that right Mr. Ghost?"

Josh shrugged good naturedly, then looked over at Hitomi, thinking about her new accessory.

"So, have you picked out a name for it yet?"

Hitomi thought back to all the MMOs and RPGs that her little brother played. Daiichi was on the path to growing up to be a NEET: he loved video games and fantasy novels, and was even trying to learn Mandarin so he could read all the latest Cultivation manhuas. Those kind of stories always had amazing weapon names like "Excalibur" and "Yggdrisil's Tear" and such.

Those kind of weapons usually had extraordinary properties and magical abilities like 30% damage increase, or 15% chance to poison, or 5% of the time would do 2x critical-hit damage.

But this humble, ordinary, no-special-stats steel pipe had saved her life: why could she bond with it like her own, person, legendary weapon?

Hitomi giggled, unable to help herself, and held it up in front of her proudly: "Yes! I will name it: Mr. Pipe!" Despite her English skills the end of the word "Pipe" still had just the tiniest "-pu" suffix to it, making it sound more like: "Mista Pie-poo."

Josh sighed theatrically. "Ladies, I wash my hands of this weirdness."

Hailey playfully punched his shoulder.

They were crossing Q Street's bridge over Rock Creek when they heard a loud commotion in the distance.