Twilight of the Soul

Reality is harsher than fantasy.

Despite the situations I had found myself in the moment I appeared in this world, I hung on to the slivers of hope that if I could be brought here, I could go back.

I was just being stupid.

Ever since I appeared in this forest, I had been nothing but a prisoner. First to the forest itself, then with the Blackfangs and now here.

Ever since I was first brought here, to this hell, the days all blended into one. The dark walls of the room I was in, the little glows of light surrounding me, they were the only things I knew. My consciousness fell continuously, and I felt as though any day could be my last. 

My body screamed as if it wanted to pass on and rest. With each experiment, I felt like I was walking the fine line of death. Jason though, forced my body to live with any means necessary. I was pumped with potions daily; all manner of potions and poisons infested my body and soul keeping the fine string of my life taut and not broken, hanging by a thread.

Flashes of memories would replay and decay like a film reel in my mind. I would see both bad times in both my lives and good times mainly in my previous life. Hanging onto these good memories that would show themselves rarely allowed me initially to keep going, hoping I could one day experience them again. 

Amongst the despair and pain there was a small fire in me that kept me going kindled initially by the good memories I had still left in my mind. This fire then fuelled itself, becoming a tempest of rage fuelled by my fate. The indignation of my placement in this world. I had time… so much time to think everything over.

Compared to when I was alone in the forest and at the Blackfangs, I had never truly sat down and just tried to comprehend everything. I was constantly on the move, constantly on the run and constantly trying to survive. 

When I first came here, my will crumbled down and I became despondent for a long time, a slave to the experiments. Yet as the days, weeks, months passed I felt the flame of indignation within me grow. This will of mine that shattered every passing day rebuilt itself over and over and over. Whenever I felt like I was about to lose myself, whenever I felt my conscious mind slipping, I somehow managed to pull myself back.

My emotions drained, as if the bowl holding them had cracked. My heart which was broken reforged cold and calm. My body, mind and soul that initially resolved itself to my fate adapted and became resistant to it. 

As these changes started to happen, as my psyche and personality changed, Jason noticeably grew angrier as I seemed to grow 'different'. The experiments intensity grew more, he used these experiments to torment me into bringing out my obscurus to study it over and over. 

Originally the experiments consisted of being force-fed potions he brewed to see how the obscurus reacted, then he started to directly feed my magical plants and materials. He also practiced curses, spells and all manor of magic on me. The magic was never lethal, whilst he certainly held no remorse for his actions ever, he wanted me to live as his 'subject'.

The changes within me though felt as though they fused with the obscurus and the obscurus in turn didn't come out unless I was truly troubled. It was almost as if it saw my current pain as boring compared to when I first came here. 

The meal of my broken soul it delighted itself on was becoming stale and it simmered down. Even the pain the obscurus brought me I started to adapt to. It was still eating away at me, like a cancer I couldn't remove, but I had adapted to the pain in brought meaning it stopped coming out as frequently.

With everything that had happened, my mind cleared, I didn't want to die here. If I were to die, I wanted to die on my own terms. So, I waited, patiently, until a twist of fate, a chance would finally come…

.

Jason stared into a room with a boy bound to a chair. He clenched his teeth in anger looking at the boy, this boy was the best research material he had ever gotten but he was also the biggest enigma Jason had ever laid his eyes on.

Typically, especially with the excessive methods Jason had used to bring out the obscurus, the boy should have long died. Yet, he always seemed to bounce back in the last moment. Jason was thrilled initially by this boys willpower as the longer he lasted the more things he could try. However, as time passed by, Dron who watched the boy 24/7 started to report some changes to the boys demeanour.

When he was first brought here, he would be pleading, screaming and crying constantly. Jason expected this sort of situation of course considering the pain an obscurus brought however as time passed Dron's reports became different. From yells of pain silence entered and then after the boys eyes grew colder and colder in recent days.

The black eyes that were usually rimmed with tears and painted with pain started to stare back with coldness. Jason who started to see this first hand, grew angrier seeing his subject 'adapt' in such a way.

His experiments became more frequent, more brutal and more thorough. Despite this, the obscurus within the boy wouldn't come out as frequently as it used to. Compared to coming out within the first 5 minutes of torture and experiments, it would now take sometimes an hour or two before and response showed. 

Seeing these changes, Jason contemplated killing the boy multiple times. He was worried he was cultivating something dangerous here, however he couldn't stop himself from wanting to learn more. He was a researcher through and through, despite everything he would always reassure himself and continue keeping his 'subject' alive.

He felt like he was close to something, his experiments had improved his knowledge on how an obscurus functioned and how it worked. If he could learn the core of what made an obscurus function truly, he may be able to harness it. Being able to 'absorb' such potent dark magic and turn it into his own would increase his magical prowess a hundred-fold. 

The long-standing goal of the Blighthearts could then come into fruition, taking this entire forest domain into their grasp and from there they could spread their influence over the Wizarding World even more. 

With the success of this research Jason's own goal would also become more in reach, within himself he secretly hated the traditions of his family. He was rash and bold as he felt that the rules and pacts of the family contained him, he wanted to overcome these 'traditions' and become a wizard powerful in his own right, rather than rely on lineage like the rest of the family did placing their hopes on the 'vein'.

He felt so close to his goal yet his research slowed as the boy's resilience seemed to grow alongside his knowledge.

Jason sat down in his study, briefly glancing at Dron who stared at Axel within the room like his life would end the moment his gaze trailed. He clicked his tongue and started to read through a pile of books he had to his side. Eventually he came onto a specific book;

'Fantastic Beasts and Where to find them by Newt Scamander'

He had heard of this book before, but hadn't taken the time to read it as his current interest only stemmed around obscurus' and his potions. He was a researcher though and beasts did interest him especially those that could be useful materials. Looking at the books title for a while he wondered if it would mention the dark beast he encountered in the forest in some way or give him some clue about it.

The study emanated with the sound of flicking pages, Jason calmly read the book for a long while before reaching the end. He snorted and held the book under his arm;

"Damn useless book…"

It had no information on the beast within the dark forest. Jason picking himself up looked over at Dron coldly and then towards the 'subject'. He spoke to Dron hauntingly for a moment;

"Dron, I'm going in".

Dron shook slightly and nodded at his masters' words. Jason entered the room and looked upon the boy in front of him. The boy raised his head and stared into his eyes; Jason felt fury rise in his chest but he bottled it. This time he just wanted to talk, to see how broken the boy's spirit was;

"You know my dear subject, after all the time you've spent here… two years has it been now? I've never actually asked you for your name. How rude of me, what is your name?"

The boys' eyes darkened and his gaze remained cold. He stayed silent for a while before responding in a raspy voice;

"Axel".

"Axel… what a weird name".

Jason stared at the boy for a while longer, noticing how his figure and hair had changed. Now longer and more ragged with some greyish-white stripes through it.

'I believe the muggles refer to this as… Marie Antoinette Syndrome, white hair appearing when subjected to traumatic situations…'

To Jason's surprise, Axel spoke up again this time unprompted.

"Why… are you bothering…"

Jason felt bemused by Axel's statement and sneered;

"Do I need to have any reason for changing how I interact with you. You are still going to be and will remain locked up here, a change of pace sometimes changes an experiments outcome. I just wanted to try something different but talking like this really isn't my style…"

As Jason finished speaking, he turned to leave, seemingly bored of his current test. As he was about to leave though, he noticed the 'subjects' eyes land on the book he was holding. The boy's eyes seemed to stay peeled on the book until he left…

.

It was unlike Jason to actually converse with me, however I gathered he just wanted to switch things up after all this time. Even deciding to finally ask me what my name was…

As he entered, he at least gave me some information on how long I had been here now – 2 years.

I was told by Rufus it was 1989 when I met him, now its 1991. This year would be the year when Harry starts Hogwarts over in Britain. Meanwhile I'm trapped here still.

After entertaining Jasons random talk, I watched him leave. As he turned, he flashed the book under his arms title.

'Fantastic Beasts and Where to find them by Newt Scamander'

For a moment I felt cold seeing this book, a reminder of how fucked up my situation was, but then my mind flashed as if a memory that was long lost to me started to replay in my head.

Replaying this memory, I finally found the one thing I had been enduring for, the thing I had been waiting for…

A way to overcome my current fate.