Chapter 48: Trial -Part 5

[ Autumn P.O.V ]

Once we left the room I remained silent as we started to walk out of the judge house. Not a word was shared between us as we all entered the cars. Once we were all seated I felt the silence was different.

I leaned and felt like Summer, covering our mouths with our fingers locked trying to breathe in and out steadily. A part of me was slowly letting the words " we won " settled into my mind. Slowly I started to smile feeling relief starting to wash over me as I had my elbows on my knees as I leaned in the passenger seat. I felt Leo watching me as I started to sniff and move my hands down my face and to my lap. I couldn't help but feel tears starting to form and burn down my cheeks. I was trying to breathe without trying to celebrate by chuckling or laughing.

I felt a comforting feeling on my neck making me start to lean into the warm tingles. Then I looked at Leo who was understanding my relief to being getting justice. I could tell my Dad was hugging Summer but I was tired from such a long day. I felt the atmosphere of the inside of the car changed into quiet celebration.

I felt surprised when I felt Leo say leaning closer to me making me glance at the clock that said it was 4:00 pm.

" How about we go out to get some early dinner, would that be fine with everyone? " my wolf was starting to stir at the feeling of finally being out of that court room. I looked down nodding yes trying to ignore the feeling of wanting to feel his affection now that there's no one watching.

Everyone else seemed up for it, but once we pulled up to a restaurant and everyone in the back seats were unbuckling and leaving through the doors. I unbuckled my belt moving it to the right when I felt confused when I noticed that Leo had his seatbelt off but was still sitting. I looked at him but then I felt my wolf respond to him whisper looking at me with a calm expression

" Come here, sweetheart. " My wolf practically leaped for joy when she made our body climb over the cup holder and onto his lap gleefully. That was when I felt myself take back control and felt once I did that he instantly wrapped his arms around me with his hands on my lower back. I enjoyed his hold close against him.

I felt my nerves starting to melt as he started to hug me close. I started to nuzzle into his neck and felt warmth and comfort starting to fill me. I started to feel surge's of pleasure at him starting to kiss my neck and from shoulder to shoulder. I felt myself starting to lean into his warmth. I knew he missed my touch as much as I've missed his.

That was when I realized I could feel myself nuzzling my body into him and moving my face under his chin. I felt his hands on my lower back moving to my hip and waist. I felt him growl

" I've missed you, I'll help you through all of this. " I felt him trying to kiss my lips sweetly letting me wrap my arms around his neck. I took a bit, but I then remembered that we have to stop. I pushed him away with my arms on his shoulders pulling out of his lips. I quickly moved my eyes to behind me making sure not to bump my back into the steering wheel and looking back.

Once I looked back I said noticing Leo was starting to lean forward going to back me into the wheel nervously " Leo, that's enough. We have to go, " I moved my right hand to slide against the door to try and open the door handle, but I felt surprised when his left hand snatched my hand. His right was on my lower back and pulling me slightly. I looked at him as he said gently

" Lets not go just yet, we were having fun right? " I felt startled and flustered but then I felt myself say looking down from him " I just want to go... please, " I wasn't in the mood anymore and I just wanted to join the others. I felt him release my hand and gave me a peck on my forehead saying sweetly

" Okay, I get it sweetheart. But no need to say ' please ', okay baby. " I felt him let go of me and we proceeded to leave the car. We followed into the restaurant but after we started to order my mind began started to wonder to what was bothering me now.

Even as we were drinking our drinks my mind was off somewhere else. I could hardly bother to take in the look of the restaurant with what I was thinking. I understood all too well that the rape special defense unit would be trying to take over for this case and I would just need to be helpful.

But I knew with what I've been told by Leo that we already helped them before by getting evidence for them to work with. I remembered what evidence we gave. After I told Leo what happened to me and we were all ready to go the next day. He carried me in his arms the whole way we were in the hospital.

It had been nearly a week since I was brought home. I felt comforted by his touch but knew why we were there. We walked in and he had placed me down but I kept my arms wrapped around his shoulder hanging on him. I was there to undergo a forensic examination to collect any evidence left behind in the assault. We went into this clean room, it had the bed with the sheet of paper on it. I kept myself close to him but once a female nurse came into the room I felt very nervous.

I didn't know what was a part of this examination and felt scared and vulnerable in this room. She explained " A doctor or nurse will conduct the four- to six-hour examination, and will preserve this evidence in a sexual assault evidence collection kit, commonly referred to as a rape kit. " The long time made me worry even more and I nearly buried myself into his chest.

Leo told me " If we choose to report the rape to the jury, the evidence in the rape kit can be one a very powerful tool in the case. " I looked up at him understanding the importance but felt confused still. Then the nurse Bethany had this plastic case and said calmly trying to inform me.

" A rape kit is a package of items used by medical personnel for gathering and preserving physical evidence following an allegation of sexual assault. " " The evidence collected from the victim can aid the criminal rape investigation and the prosecution of a suspected assailant. " I wanted to know more because I felt very uncomfortable and on edge. I didn't like it but the more I herd the word rape the more I felt uncomfortable and upset at the situation.

But sadly, with possessive werewolves in the world rape cases and assault have become nearly seventy five percent more than any that were made by human cases.

That's why while any doctor or nurse can perform the examination by following the instructions provided in the kit, some hospitals have specially trained personnel on staff called Sexual Assault Forensic Examiners (SAFES) or Sexual Assault Nurse Examiners (SANEs) to perform the rape kit examination. Research shows that programs with trained examiners significantly increase evidence collection and investigation in sexual assault cases, which results in significantly higher prosecution rates. Further, SANES and SAFES are trained to conduct exams that are sensitive, dignified and reduce trauma.

Leo was the one to try and settle my nerves and wasn't going to leave me from the room and was going to be through it with me. First, she obtained a thorough medical history from us. I was instructed by Bethany as I stand on a large sheet of paper. I was instructed to start undressing which sent fear into me as I shot my eyes to Leo whimpering feeling scared.

He had the mind-link on and told me to look at only him while I do it. There's no need to be scared was what he told me. His words and gaze on me gave me strange comfort making undressing not so uncomfortable and awkward. This was all in order to catch any hair or fiber evidence that may fall from my body. I was only in my underwear and felt my arms wrapped around myself but my wolf and me did found that Leo was keeping considerable distance from us. It made me feel a little lonely and I understood he just didn't want to compromise the evidence. That was probably the only thing that he was told to do to keep him in the room.

The victim's clothing and the sheet are collected for testing of hair, fibers and any additional evidence. The second Bethany unclipped the container case of the rape kit I felt my whole body flinch and quickly looked in the same direction. Her eyes looked at me from the case and knew I wasn't in a stable comfortable situation. So she showed the case to me and showed everything to me and explained each thing to me so that I feel more assured for the more physical part of the examination.

Most kits include the following items: Detailed instructions for the examiner, forms for documenting the procedure and evidence gathered. Tubes and containers for blood and urine samples, paper bags for collecting clothing and other physical evidence. Swabs for biological evidence collection, a large sheet of paper on which the victim undresses to collect hairs and fibers. Dental floss and wooden sticks for fingernail scrapings, glass slides, sterile water and saline, envelopes, boxes and labels for each of the various stages of the exam.

I felt a little better and allowed her to proceed to swab my skin, mouth, but I know that my clothes I wore when it happened were still in the Alpha Andrews pack house which was being taken as we speak for evidence. Bethany was nice and understanding since any kind of invasive stuff like this was not comforting in the least, but she was very respectful. She has me lay on the bed and it had these side panels that comfy white pillows on them that matched the one my head was on.

I'd say it was comfortable but then she set up this thing near my legs that held up blue covers like a tent. My confusion was shattered the moment I realized she could open up the end and asked in a very careful tone

" Alright, now Miss Autumn Miller...can you please proceed to take your underwear down? " I remember feeling fear flash through me and my wolf took over visible from my eyes. I yelped and started to squirm upwards quickly whining and making high pitch sounds I could remember tears forming in my eyes in terror. I was breathing so fast that I felt dizzy. When she tried to say trying to be calming

" Don't panic Miss, I won't touch you without your consent. " but from my view I saw something blocking me from seeing from my stomach down and could only see a stranger on the other end. I felt my foot push against something and my eyes were black and started to growl at her direction feeling it could have been her hand and this growl was one that was feral and stern. It was the first time in a long time my wolf actually was standing up for us. Also that I growl that harshly to anyone.

But then I herd a low husky growl that made me freeze, and my wolf was starting to whine while my growl had ceased. Leo was the one to ask Bethany if since he's kept himself at a distance from me whether he was able to approach me. She said everything except the genial regain but to keep this as preserved as possible. With this I felt him cup my face and started to say sweetly brushing near my eyes the tears that has just began to escape.

" It's okay, it's okay. I know you must be really scared right now but.." I felt myself whining still wanting his warm comforting touch which my nearly bare body craved to reach out to hold. I felt a lot happier that I finally managed him to be so close to me but then he finished and smiled and looked at Bethany with his face looking close to me

" ..don't you think you should apologize to this nice nurse now, baby? " I felt my fear melt away as I darted my eyes down and back up again to Bethany. I felt apologetic but also very embarrassed but I did it in a hushed whisper with my head down feeling like I had been scolded

" Sorry Miss Bethany, " she was understanding but I felt very uncomfortable still. But then she tried to convince me while Leo was starting to place kisses on my forehead and jaw. Then I decided to try and go through with it trying to lay back down like before now that I had Leo watching and keeping me calmer.

She proceeded to ask me before starting to do anything which was a little reassuring. She was careful to ask before placing a towel under the my butt and comb my pubic hair in downward strokes to collect any of my assailant's pubic hairs. Taking some of mine to compare, I felt very uncomfortable when she started to ask if she could try swabbing in my genital region.

But I remember that I did think in that moment, whether my discomfort now could spare me even more of it and questions in court with Alpha Andrews in the room. That gave me fuel to endure as she used four cotton swabs to swab my cervix, vaginal area, and rectum area. She even told me about areas that were torn and the slight bruises that she asked for permission to take pictures. I gave the go ahead after trying to calm down after noticing that Leo looked bothered by the idea.

She made sure to ask if I could move and informed me of each picture before snapping. I wasn't comfortable despite her attempts to try and make it better for me, but the second I noticed Leo was starting to move from my side while looking in the direction of the other end of the bed. He started to slowly move to walk behind Bethany but I felt with each step he was taking walking away made me feel worried and concerned. I kept my eyes on him but when he got behind her to take a look for the first time at the extent of the damage. All I could see was them from the shoulders up.

The only thing I could hear was Bethany asking in a calm voice as she proceeded to ask if I could move one of my legs so she could get a different angle. I wasn't paying attention much to her now, but I complied while keeping my eyes on Leo.

I felt my breathing becoming frantic as it began to pound at seeing Leo's eyes turning black with a scary look of silent fury. I could hear the growl inside his chest firing. I felt myself start to comprehend him seeing me like this. Seeing the extent and the pain and anger he was facing. I felt my eyes tearing up as the possible image of how bad it was started to rush into my mind.

I felt an extreme sense of shame, and fear rush through me. I started to quickly close and push my legs away and started to sob and try to curl my legs into my chest starting to try and hide. With that Bethany was going to say something but stopped once she looked over at Leo and herd the growl still in his throat. She gave a stern look as she cleared her throat and moved my gaze from him to me. She made it clear, his eyes fading to a cloudy haze as his growling ceased.

I remember feeling horrible and hadn't even seen the pictures yet. Leo walked over to my side and didn't know that at that moment I felt like I was damaged. I didn't want him to see me like that, at least if he had said anything I would at least be aware of what he was doing and his reaction might have felt less painful. He started to say trying to comfort me at my left side of the bed to attempt to calm me down

" Hey, hey, it's going to be okay. " his hand tried to brush my mark but I flinched before he could find it as he did I could feel my body start to tremble. He started to brush my hair behind my ear to see more of my face. My chest hurt how tightly I was trying to pull my legs into it, maybe I just wished I'd hide but couldn't.

He said softly trying to be reassuring " Sweety, I promise, it's not as bad as you think it is. " I glanced my eyes to look at him but his eyes still held that haze that told me it was still bad. I wanted to believe him, goddess I did, but when I tried to lift my face I felt even when he tried to lean to caress and nuzzle me I could tell that my whimpering. It upset him so it made him start to peck and try to attack my neck feverishly. I could tell it wasn't a sight he wanted to see me so distraught in only my bra and him unable to hop up on the bed and on top of me to hold me. A part of me wanted him to but once I started to calm down was when I let myself breath calmer but I practically started to cling to his arms and hands.

I wanted to rub my wet face peck at his face and nuzzle his neck he had lowered down. I couldn't stop feeling awful and wanted to apologize to him for what I've put him threw. I finally calmed down and started to feel his eyes return to normal making me feel better that he was showing me his sweet smile and soft golden eyes.

After everything was done everything was carefully packaged and contained. Even as I sat in the one of the only chairs at the end of a long dinning table in a restaurant called "The Shell House " seafood restaurant. It overlooked a dock near the beach one of which even trying to eat some red potatoes, crab, and shrimp with a red and white picnic pattern cloth on the table.

The sign had a life-saver with a big shrimp with a cute small olive martini in one of the little arms. It was a cute design and it was on the menus too.

Thinking about the thoughts of what will be brought up tomorrow. It made me feel kinda wheezy and I just didn't feel like eating and even I hadn't realized that Leo was starting to try and talk to me from across the other end of the table.

" Autumn? " I looked up from my food but then I felt surprised when a conversation with Jay and Liz was unfolding with Ron and Nick.

" We seriously aren't going to be able to go swimming at the beach at all while we're here? " Jay complained but then Liz said " Well once everything is done we can try and take the time to relax and go swimming then. " She offered from across the table in front of her but then Nick said from sitting at her right leaning close to her with a smirk

" I'm more than up for that, what say you guys? " each of them started to agree but as much as I was wondering why I was thinking about this topic all of a sudden my mind quickly turned to thinking about Jace and Grayson. So I ended up saying sure as I started to sit up from the table and said leaving towards the bathroom

" But I have to make a quick call for a second, " I left as I moved to just outside the woman's bathroom and started to call up the phone number for the pack house's phone. I leaned on the white wall holding the phone in my right hand to my ear. Everything today felt stressful and I think me just feeling on edge is why I was feeling the need after such a long time since we last checked in on the boys.

Once we talked for a good ten minutes I ended the call. But even as I held my phone with my arms crossed I felt myself sigh with my eyes closed trying to relax knowing that the boys are fine. I missed them so much that at times I'd swear that I could hear slight noises that would make me think of them. With all this stress I really can't think about anything but what is stressing me out. But as I started to stand up straight I felt surprised when Leo was in view.

" Autumn, are you doing okay? " I had told him I just was checking in on the boys but I felt him starting to say moving close to me " What's got you so distracted sweety? " I tried to brush it off but even I wasn't believing myself for a second.

I felt surprised when he started to wrap his arms around my waist and said with a slightly concerned look " You have been out of it since we got here. You have hardly even eaten much. "

" What is it that's bothering you baby? " I felt myself say " I'm just worried and stressed out is all, " I felt him starting to peck at my face and saying sweetly

" I get that but how about when we get back to the guest room we try and relax. " I felt pleasant tingles along my hand and neck making my wolf pur and the feeling in my chest. This fuzzy tingling was why when he started to lean me close against the wall was when I let out a moan.

Just as I was enjoying him starting to kiss my mark with his arms and legs pinning me to the wall. I was about to lift my arms to reach up to him but then.

" Mhm, excuse me. " I felt my eyes launched to the corner of my eyes and next thing I know I felt my face flush in embarrassment as I saw a woman in their thirty's had asked with raised eyebrows

" Do you mind allowing me to walk passed? Don't mean to interrupt. " I felt Leo lean closer against the wall only to feel more flustered when I realized his eyes were merely glancing at the woman unfazed as he pressed against me. Once she left the hallway and the woman's bathroom I felt Leo taking a step back letting me not so shielded by his body. He looked down at me but I felt when he had a smile on and leaned his face to try and go for my lips but I pushed his chest away for him to stop. He did but asked

" What is it? " I felt my face lowering as I said " How about we just stop and head on back? " I felt him start to peck at my neck asking

" Why? " I couldn't even look at him because I felt took embarrassed at the thought that a woman had walked out of the bathroom probably thinking that we were well..going at it.

I couldn't stand it as I felt Leo ask before backing up " She killed the mood huh? " I nodded feeling myself look up and down from him. He had an understanding expression on his face but once we were starting to walk out into the dinning room of the restaurant I felt him slide his left hand to hold my side. As we walked over to our table I noticed that everything seemed to resume as it was before. I felt more motivated to try and eat now.

This place was a nice choice and I do love seafood, but as long as I'm not reminded that it was or is alive. Or that it's familiar to me. I love shrimp and we even had calamari. But after we noticed lobster and I was dipping the lobster meat chunks into some melted butter. But I felt surprised once I felt full and satisfied and we were heading for the cars when a familiar voice addressed me and Leo.

" Alpha Leo, Luna Autumn, " I looked with him at the front of the car at the woman who saw us. We knew her or at least I had met her before another time. I looked at Leo on the other side of the car. He was looking at her and I felt very uneasy. He leaned his head into the car and told the others to wait a minute before closing the door. I felt him start to walk up to this woman as I slowly did the same.

This woman had a buttoned up white shirt that had some of them unbuttoned making a v-line shape. She had these dark blue jeans with a buckle black belt with a long black sleeved over jacket that reminded me of leather that was completely open. I looked at her and I know that it's not that she looks a way that is making me upset or anything.

She has carmel skin with pretty nice sienna color to her brown eyes. She has nice brown curly hair with red burnt tips that fade as it blends into lighter browns as it transitions. Ann Cox, she's the detective of the special victims unit that has been on the rape case from the beginning. She has been charged with looking into both gathering the rape kit, going to analyze the pack house's scene gathering evidence.

She has been not only at our house but been going everywhere to try and develope a case for us. She acts very respectable but I still felt a sense of dread when seeing her. It was mostly because I felt the idea of telling her my story another time and hearing how the case was developing for the next day. I think the reminder was what I didn't like about her wanting to talk with us. I finally was able to relax and was excited to go back to the pack house and finally just let that be the end of the day.

I walked over to Leo and herd where they were starting from "-chain of custody is essential to any legal proceedings. After the kit was completed and given to the proper authorities, the nurse examiner may be called into court to testify on the evidence provided tomorrow. "

I felt myself look at Leo as I started to listen some more I felt my nerves returning making me move to his side once Ann's eyes looked at me and addressed me was when I felt even worse

" Luna Autumn, even a nurses word isn't going to be enough. You will have to have your testimony of what happened brought forward in court. " I felt so nervous that I felt myself lean into Leo and when I did he asked

" Can I be the one to tell the story to the courtroom? " I looked up slightly at Ann but then she said showing a slight sad look but said flatly

" I'm afraid that'd be hearsay which is the report of another person's words by a witness, which is usually disallowed as evidence in a court of law. I'm afraid we'll only be able to hear her story from her alone I'm afraid. " I felt my eyes fall down again and felt my right hand that was on his side gripped at his shirt.

' I couldn't have expected to hear anything different, but....why can't I hope just for a little while longer that it'll be more barrable. ' ' I managed to keep most of my pride after what happened keeping my anger and pain in check while I just want to forget and get over with the rest of my life. '

I felt better when he started to move his hand to try and hold mine making me feeling a little better. I felt the thought of Ann ending up bringing my therapist/ consultant to the stand and get her to talk about what I've confided in her to the court.

I remembered that I could not release my right to confidence that kept the details of what we've talked about hidden. I was thankful, but also scared at the thought that if I testified it'd still be me having to go through the details with Alpha Andrews eyes staring at me. The thought alone was upsetting.

I was advised by Leo trying to be more encouraging " Don't worry now, this is going to be a good way for you to regain control. All you'll need to do is look at Ann and try to answer any questions. " I did want control over my life again. I needed it and wanted to just get away from here and just begin to heal and move on with my life again.

I felt Leo's touch moving from my hand to brush my cheek once I said quietly " I just..I want to go home already. I want to see our boys and just try and get on with our lives. " I felt him starting to pull himself to wrap his arm around my waist. I found myself leaning into him and thinking about our time together as a family.

Ann Cox did say calmly letting us start to walk back to the car doors " Don't you worry, by tomorrow all of this should go back to how they were before the trial. " we gave our good-byes to her after I made it clear that I was going to testify still and wasn't going to back out.

We went into the car and didn't say a word as we began to drive to the pack house. But we only said we were just getting some last minute discussion before the trial tomorrow. Once we parked into the driveway and entered the house. I wasn't even hungry and was just put out. I decided to just try and take a shower, which was motion sensors to have it turn on. It took forever but then I was told about dinner.

So I put on some fitting jean pants and buttoned up my long sleeve white t-shirt. After eating I felt done for the day and while I would have liked to talk with the others. I just started to get in our room and started to plop myself face forward on the bed.

I took in the scent of the sheets which was a non-scented but reminded me of how our bed smelled at home. I missed it, but as I started to turn on my back and groaned. I herd a sound from the doorway of our room. I quickly looked at it and felt surprised when it was Changer Luke. I quickly sat myself up as he said with a small smirk

" Long day, don't worry. " I didn't like being vulnerable or unguarded when he is around but after glaring at him he chuckled and said

" No need for that look, besides I'm not interested in stealing you away. I just like to tease and bug our Alpha since I get a kick out of it when he reacts. " I understood that enough at least but I enjoyed it when Leo growled from behind once he walked to our room. He made Luke surprised but also left the room once he suggested he'd get out.

I couldn't help but noticed when I stopped chuckling that Leo was already looking at me with this smile and almost sad look in his eyes. He was already in front of me and started to caress some of my hair. I felt startled when he said quietly

" It feels like an eternity since I last herd you chuckle like that. " I felt myself think about for the first time in a while. How long has it been since I have laughed? I wasn't even sure but then I felt him starting to peck my forehead and then dragging to my lips.

I noticed that once I started to kiss him more he started to pull me slightly to let me lay down on the bed. He started to kiss me with his arms pinned to my sides. I felt better but then I noticed that he was starting to hold my sides as I felt him starting to kiss my face and once he did I felt my wolf whining happily making me arch my back a bit.

I looked up when he stopped and I felt confused but then I looked and noticed his right hand was starting to be at the first button on my white shirt. I felt my face becoming flushed at him looking at me and back down as he tentatively started to flick at the button bellow it. I felt surprised when he started to kiss my collar and making me close my eyes as I felt myself moan once I felt him peck my sternum.

He stopped before moving to my mark as I felt him unbuttoning my buttons one-bye-one as he started to nuzzle into my skin making me smile as I started to grip his shoulders some more. I felt him had my shirt unbuttoned opened up as I felt his hands on my sides. I felt happy when started to move his soft kisses down to my chest. I felt panicked as heat moved through me at his hands moving to my chest making my wolf yelp out loud

" Leo! " his eyes looked up from my skin as my breathing quickened. But I could have sworn he had a smirk crawl across his face as he started to suckle at my skin and surprised me when he gave my chest a squeeze. I felt myself starting to let a high-pitched yelp escape me as I started to try and kick and push his shoulders and chest away. My face was heated and my wolf was going to have us panting in no time flat.

He stopped once I let out a huff and turned my head once I did that he stopped and started to nuzzle into me brushing his nose into me as his hands slid from my chest to my sides again pecking and nipping at my skin. I felt self-conscious how loud his groaning was getting and how I was starting to moan. I tried to close my eyes and pull his shoulders and him closer to me. He started to nuzzle my stomach and then started to trail his fingers down my legs but it was when he started to trail his tongue down my sternum and down my stomach. I felt myself flip around at this but when he started to suckle at me with his hands on the sides of my arms.

I felt surprised when I realized he moved down and kissed my bellybutton which startled me as it sent a shiver down my spine. I felt myself think about how this all started with us kissing and then I felt a little sad that I wanted to kiss him more. I wanted to be more engaged with him. I felt my face burning as I rested my left side of my head on the bed and left it alone, but my wolf understood and wasn't having it. She let out a whine that transitioned into a long groan.

With that he stopped and his gaze shot up to look at my face but then I felt him starting to to move to stand over me again looking down at me. My eyes were fluttering as they quickly went from him to down. I felt startled when he brushed his nose along the side of my neck.

He gently asked " What's wrong baby? I know that you liked me touching and kissing you. " I felt surprised when he started to nudge and nuzzle my neck trying to get me to turn my head so he can find my mark.

I looked at him and slowly started to lay my head back and started to peck and nibble at my mark making me move my hands to lock behind his neck. As I started to enjoy the attention but then I whined at him a little upset when he moved to my collar. With this he pulled his head back and was looking confused but then I pulled his neck down closer to my face then looked from his face to his lips and back. With this he got that I was trying to get him to understand.

He started to brush his lips on mine just to check if he was right and seemed happy that I started to kiss him happily. I think that's when he realized that after such a long time without kissing each other like this I felt thrilled to feel him kissing me so openly. After a while I was able to pull him so close to me and loved when I felt his left hand on my right cheek and started to tilt my head while we kissed. My brain was empty and I felt myself getting happy as I felt him slowly transitioning to stop tilting my head and switched his hands and started to tilt my head to the left. I loved it but then I started to feel him pulling out of the kiss.

I opened my eyes feeling confused but then I started to pull my arms down as I started to peck at his neck asking quietly " What? Don't go..." I stopped and started to nuzzle him but then when I stopped he smiled happily and started to finish where I left off and nuzzled my neck and down my collar. I felt surprised when he licked up my neck real quick but then I felt surprised when he did this and my wolf was excited and started to pull him down. This startled him because just like that his face was pulled into my chest and a little above my white lace cupped bra.

He struggled for a second but then he didn't do anything but then I started to feel my face turning bright red. I could hear him starting to groan and I can feel it too. I yelped, I started to feel his hands on the outer part of my thighs and starting to stroke up to my underwear. I could feel his hot breath exhaling from his nose and the pleasure from his fingertips felt alarming.

I started to lift my arms and moved them off of him. I felt surprised when I growled at him when he was brushing and playing with the lining of my underwear. My hands started to shake in the air slightly as I felt him starting to kiss at chest and trying to nibble at my skin. I felt once he was starting to touch me I felt all the heat out of my face and started to feel strange.

I started to feel my breathing start to rush and I couldn't look down at him anymore, all I can do is look up and feel still and I started to feel lost and confused.

[ Leo P.O.V ]

Once she had me in her breasts I felt stuck but in heaven like I can plank and sleep forever here. But her scent was overwhelming me and I missed just feeling the warm and soft body I rarely have been able to touch much anymore. I kept my eyes closed just so this dream doesn't break me throwing me back to the reality of the day to come if we just decided to just fall asleep.

I loved how smooth and soft her skin felt as I caressed her thighs all the more it making me want her so badly to let me...

Then the illusion was broken once I herd her breathing changing and that I couldn't feel her soft hands and arms wrapped around my neck. I opened my eyes and looked up at her face stopping touching her and just holding her hips. I felt surprised when I noticed her face was tilted up and I couldn't stop seeing from under her chin and neck.

" Autumn? Are you al- " I froze once I noticed shuttering coming from her and herd slight sobbing. I quickly stood up on my hands and knees and asked noticing that she wasn't acting like she hasn't seen me starting to move overhead. I started to feel startled when she started to slowly move her arms above her face. She started to seem in a haze by the glimpse I could see in her eyes. They were wet and I felt confused and panicked asking

" Autumn! Did-Did I do something?! Did I overstep?! Please...are you..alright? " I felt myself getting sad and worried ' Did I scare her? Or did I bring some bad memories back to mind? ' ' DAMN IT!!! I..I can't even try to be intimate with her! I can't...'

I started to climb off of her and moved to sit on her left side of the bed. I moved my hand out to her to brush one of her hands saying calmly trying to just make her stop crying already

" Hey, sweetheart, I'm here. It's okay, so please..stop crying. " It hurt seeing her so unhappy and nervous that's why being affectionate and being her soldier against pain.

" I'm.." I looked at her and she moved her left hand in mine letting me clasp it. I looked over her body which didn't seem so shaky anymore. I felt once I moved closer I asked

" Are you feeling better? What was it that was so wrong? Did I do something wrong that made you?- " I stopped when I felt soft fingers on my mouth. I looked to see her left hand was stopping me. Her eyes looked sad but she shook her head no intensely keeping her eyes on me. I felt her right hand in my left. I could feel her trying to rub her face into our clasped hands.

She wouldn't stop until I realized that her tears were new now and I moved my right hand to grasp her small hand. I felt like I wanted to close my eyes and enjoy her sweet soft touch of her fingers, but I started to say against her fingertips trying to move my right hand to her cheek

" Sweetheart, there's no need to cry about this. " I looked at her only to notice that she's crying even more. I started to notice she dropped her hand from my face and said

" I'm sorry! I know I should be able to stop crying like this. I'm sorry you can't- " I hated that she was so hurting so much.

[ Autumn P.O.V ]

I hated it when he thought that it was because of him that this happened. I couldn't bare him having that kind of strain on our relationship and him, ever, feeling discouraged because of me.

It was like I was getting scared and then I felt froze stiff like I couldn't bare to look down at him or what was happening. It was like I was paralyzed and I was acutely of it and I was panicking because I didn't know what was happening to me. I couldn't control my own body and I at one point begged in my head for him to just stop so that whatever this is would go away.

I never wanted for us to sleep together with me like that and I was panicking and upset. Once it stopped my arms were finally able to move above my face. I told Leo this stuff so he wasn't as confused and lost as me. He then said

" I think it was your mind and body's response to trying to protect themselves. " I looked at him and thought that through and it made sense enough and then he said " Our therapist, she said once that since you've had multiple possible rape experiences that each one did something that you learned to do each time. "

" Like that time when the rogues invaded our pack and attempted to do it. You tried to survive even if you were trembling. The other time at that prison cell, you fought back and did all you could. Each time you fought and you won. " I thought back and felt thankful that it didn't get worse than both were.

" But I think, with what Alpha Andrews..." I felt his voice was cautious as he looked at me.

" I know you fought back hard, but with each time. You started to get adjusted to feeling helpless and started to retract yourself from feeling as much trauma and pain with each time. I wouldn't be surprised that getting close with me will end in your body trying to protect yourself too. "

I felt better once Leo said " It makes sense, and I was told how to best understand and handle you being in this state and what to do afterwards to help you out. "

But because I was trembling, even now, I started to feel my energy I had left was spent for the day. It was 7 pm now, I started to feel so comfortable with him brushing my tears and feeling his hand on my face. I started to feel like falling asleep but then I started to try and pull him closer.

" Why don't we get some sleep now, okay? " My eyes felt heavy and I said " Okay, " as I decided that was what I needed he was acting very calm and respectful as we both started to sleep as I nestled up to him. I could feel him pecking at my face and hands lightly making me smile as I tried to kiss him back on the lips before I nuzzled him a little before trying to hold him to sleep. Taking comfort in his touch made me feel better and forget what's to happen tomorrow.