19. Papa Bear and Baby Bear

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Kate had disappeared with Jamie into the bathroom while Castle had offered to do the dishes. Of course Kate had argued it wasn't necessary, she would do it later, but Castle had insisted. It was the least he could do after she'd had all the work preparing dinner for them. In the end she had sighed and nodded. If he really wanted to do the dishes then she wouldn't stop him. She actually smiled when she finally handed over the dish towel and surrendered.

"Rick?!" Jamie came running back into the kitchen, dressed in her PJ's and the book Rick had bought for her clutched tightly to her chest. Kate was following right on her daughter's heels, chuckling at Jamie's more than obvious excitement. She'd had some trouble keeping her in the bathroom long enough to get her ready for bed, her daughter constantly bouncing on her feet.

"All set and ready for the bed bus?" Castle raised questioning and amused eyebrows at the two ladies as he leant against the kitchen counter, putting away the dish towel.

"Yes," Jamie shrieked, holding her arms out to him.

He easily picked her up, placing her on his hip and directed his expectant eyes at Kate.

"Down the hall to the right," she answered his unspoken question, pointing into the direction of the bathroom behind which two doors let to what he supposed to be Kate's and Jamie's bedrooms, "I'll need to finish some papers, if that's okay."

"Sure," he nodded. "Join us when you're done?"

"Yeah, shouldn't take me too long." She replied as their eyes met, warm and content and it took her some will power to finally tear hers away from him. "I'll -," she pointed in the direction of the living room.

"And we'll -," he signalled into the opposite direction.

"Yeah," she sighed. This was getting ridiculous and then she almost knocked the living daylights out of him as she stepped forward leaning into his personal space and for a second he really thought she was going to kiss him. But instead she went for her daughter, placing a loving kiss on her lips, "Be good, Baby Bird. I'll come and tuck you in later."

"Okay mommy," Jamie nodded, snuggling into Castle's chest, in which his heart was still racing. Seriously, what was wrong with him? Why would she suddenly kiss him?

It was definitely best to get himself onto safer grounds and out of the danger zone, so he finally set into motion for Jamie's bedroom.

Once there, he sat Jamie down and she started shuffling through the room showing him around. She introduced him to all of her stuffed animals and Castle immediately realized that Mr. Squibbles, a monkey, was the most important one.

On one wall of Jamie's bedroom was a painted picture of playing bears and he wondered if Kate had made it herself, storing the question to the back of his mind to ask her sometime. Over Jamie's bed on the ceiling was a starry sky and Jamie told Castle to turn off the lights, while she used a switch as her bedside table and suddenly they found themselves under the dancing stars. Jamie shuffled back to his side, taking Castle's hand as he watched in awe how the lights flickered around the room. It was beautiful.

"That's awesome," he exclaimed, feeling Jamie tug on his hand, wanting to be picked up again.

"Mommy made," she explained once she was back on his arm, leaning her head against his and for a moment and he had to close his eyes to get a hold of the emotions, swirling inside of him.

"Story?" His daughter finally asked and Castle was glad for the distraction and being able to focus on something else but his daughter in his arms so trusting. He switched the lights back on and took the book from the bed where Jamie had left it, picking up Mr. Squibbles as well and handing him over to Jamie. Castle sat down in the big armchair he found in one corner of the room. Jamie was getting comfortable in his lap, snuggling into him, her head resting against his chest, while his arm securely wrapped around her as he tried to calm his racing heart before he finally began to read.

That's how Kate found them half an hour later, when she quietly made her way to Jamie's room. She stopped in the doorway, half hidden in the shadow of the hallway and watched them while Castle was reading to their daughter.

His voice was rich and low, bringing the characters to life in a way she'd never heard before. There was a part of her that wondered what it would feel like to have him read his books to her, but right now she was too focused on the sight in front of her. Her daughter cradled in her father's embrace, clinging to every word that fell from his lips, mesmerized.

"When Papa Bear and Baby Bear walked back to their den after Baby Bear's long and adventurous day, Baby Bear had a question to ask," Castle read, before pitching his voice up a few notches. "Papa Bear, why did you come and find me?" Castle's voice was a low rumble, when he read Papa Bear's answer, "Because fathers always come for their children. No matter what they might have done, no matter how off-handed they might have acted. Papa Bear will always come for Baby Bear."

Jamie sighed when Castle read Baby Bears reply, snuggling even closer into his chest, "I love you Papa Bear."

Castle looked down at his daughter, his voice full of emotions when he read the last words Papa Bear spoke to Baby Bear, "And Papa Bear will always love Baby Bear."

It was a sweet story about a father's love for his child and Castle took in a deep breath when he closed the book, placing it on the floor next to him as his eyes found Kate's in the doorway, "The end." He whispered, wondering how long Kate had been standing there.

It was quite as everyone seemed to be lost in their thoughts until Jamie's small hand reached for the lapel of Rick's shirt, tugging until he looked at her and there was something swimming in her eyes that made his heart clench, his pulse race, "Rick daddy?"

He swallowed as breathing had suddenly become almost impossible. She couldn't be asking what he thought she was, what he hoped she was. But maybe the story had stirred something in her, maybe she felt the bond as strongly as he did? The past weeks had been … he didn't even have words for it.

"I am a dad, yes." He answered as wary as he could manage, his eyes locking with Kate's that were widening in shock as she realized what was going on, what was going to happen and she pushed off the doorframe, darting towards her daughter.

"My daddy?" Jamie's voice was so small, so quiet, yet so hopeful, her eyes swimming with tears.

His head shot up, seeing Kate had already let herself fall on her knees in front of them. He searched her face for any sign of what she wanted him to do or say and when she nodded ever so lightly, his heart stopped. It was time, this was it.

Taking a deep breath, he clutched Jamie a bit tighter before he finally spoke the words he had yearned to say for so long now, "Yes Jamie. I'm your daddy."

Silence filled the room again, as Kate's reached for her daughter's hand, waiting for her reaction but Jamie kept silent. Kate moved even closer, her knees brushing Castle's in the progress as she tried to gauge her daughter's reaction to the news.

"Baby Bird, do you understand what that means?" Kate finally asked softly, but Jamie kept quiet, avoiding her mother's gaze and Kate looked at Castle helpless. She didn't know what to do and from the look on his face, Castle didn't know either.

But then he said the first thing that came to his mind, as he usually did, and he knew it had gotten him into trouble more than once, but what else was he supposed to do?

"Is that okay for you, Jamie? Me being your dad?" He asked gently, tipping his index finger against her nose as he had observed Kate doing it so many times before.

Jamie looked up, studying him, "Like Papa Bear?" She asked hesitantly, her eyes shy but Castle knew exactly what she meant.

"Yes, from now I'll be there for you, just like Papa Bear and just like your mommy."

"Okay," Jamie simply accepted, not questioning where he had been until now. But he knew that day would come. She would get older and one day she would asked where he had been for the first two years of her life, but right now it didn't matter. She knew, she finally knew and he didn't have to pretend anymore. He lifted his chin, placing a soft kiss on top of Jamie's head.

"Always Jamie. I promise."

He felt Kate's fingers curl around his left hand, squeezing tightly, almost painfully causing him to look at her. There were tears in her eyes and he couldn't tell if it was a good or a bad sign and before he could muse about it any longer, she pushed herself up from her kneeling position, putting on a neutral face.

"Come on Baby Bird, time to sleep." She said walking over to Jamie's bed and pulling pack the covers, knowing their girl was way too tired to really process this major change in her life. Castle slowly stood up, Jamie sleepily in his arms and carried her over to the bed, gently placing her down.

"Good night Butter Cup," he whispered and Jamie's small arms caught him around his neck, pulling him down and placing a soft kiss on his lips.

"Night Daddy," she mumbled into his neck and then let go, waiting for her mother to kiss her good night as well.

"Sleep tight, Baby Bird," Kate spoke softly before slipping past Castle, one hand brushing his shoulder as she left the room, giving the two of them another minute to their own.

He walked back into the living room, finding Kate staring out the window and his spirit sank a little, seeing her so deeply lost in her thoughts couldn't be a good sign.

"Kate?" His voice was soft as he announced his presence.

And then she surprised him as she turned, a soft smile playing around her lips, "Hey."

He took in a deep breath, taking a relieved step towards her before trying to formulate a coherent thought, "That was … ." There were no words.

"Unexpected?" She helped him out, chuckling. "Yeah it was."

"You okay with it?" He asked tentatively. "I mean -."

She pushed herself off the window, making her way over to the couch and only now he noticed the two glasses filled with wine sitting on the coffee table.

"It's certainly not the way I pictured it to happen," she offered, sitting down and signalling him to join her. "But maybe it was best she figured it out herself."

"Yeah," he sighed, still shell-shocked as he dropped down next to Kate.

"Hey," she reached out for him but shying away when she realized there had been way too much touching going on already between them today, especially for two people who usually didn't touch. "You okay?"

He looked at her, surprised. She had never been too worried about his feelings in all of this. He knew it sounded harsh and bitter, but it was true nevertheless, so far it had always been him who had been considerate of her feelings. Tiptoeing around the topics that mattered most to him, but maybe from tonight a lot of things would be different. Should he hope for it?

"A bit overwhelmed," he admitted finally, realizing she was still waiting for an answer and trying to smile.

"I can relate to that," Kate agreed softly.

"What do you think caused her to figure it out?" He asked, finally allowing himself to reach for the glass of wine to take a sip, he surely needed it.

"I don't know, maybe the story of Papa Bear." She guessed and his eyes widened.

"Kate, I didn't -," God he hoped she didn't think he tried to sort of trick Jamie into finding out the truth by buying that book. "I swear Jamie picked the book."

She didn't answer just got up, placing her glass back on the coffee table and leaving him on the couch alone. Castle could only watch her as she crossed the room, seemingly avoiding him or preparing for an attack of wrath. It had been going so well until now. Why did it always have to end in some sort of drama? Why tonight?

"Kate?" He tried again, noticing she had picked something up as she made her way back to him.

"I know Castle, I know," she smiled, trying to reassure him. "Actually I have to admit our daughter kind of pulled a stunt on you."

Castle looked at her clueless, "What?"

Kate laughed, holding out the book she had retrieved from one of the boxes that contained some of Jamie's toys. He reached for it unsure what Kate was getting at until he read the title.

"That's the book," he stated the obvious, staring back up at her in surprise.

"It's her favorite," Kate shrugged amused. "She made you buy a book she already has."

"No," he stared at her in disbelief. "No," he repeated and then heard her laugh, trying to hide it behind her bangs, but it was no use as her whole body was shaking with it. Gosh and he'd be damned if he didn't love the sound of it.

"It's not that funny," he pouted nevertheless and she lifted her head, meeting his eyes and her face said it all, it was funny. "Maybe a bit," he shrugged before he broke and grinned at her like an idiot. Who cared anyway. Jamie knew, she finally knew. Nothing could take that away from him, he could worry about everything else tomorrow.

"So," she sighed. "What now?"

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