Reviews of In the DC World with a System
In the DC World with a System
Darthnorther
- Overall Rate
- Writing Quality
- Updating Stability
- Story Development
- Character Design
- world background
Keep in mind I only got to ch.20. Really f'n boring. The beginning was promising 'like woo a system story, this will be a fun little op trot through the dc comics.' Nah, the author is kinda not that smart. To give perspective, he thinks humans use less than 10% of their brains type of not smart. The author time skips the whole training arc! Any character growth, story progression, attachment to the characters, everything absolutely crucial to story telling is thrown right down the toilet. And the worst part is there's zero scenes where the mc works for any of his advantages, so the character is instantly unlikable. Then suddenly There's a ten chapter paint drying extravaganza of a skirmish in which the Mc doesn't even participate only characters introduced during the chapters. It;s clear to everyone reading that this author thinks writing works like a movie where flashing lights and beautiful girls can carry the team like a diamond 3 boasting silvers, but nah m8. Flashing lights aren't impressive as dry letters on a page. Don't get me started on the dialogue. That thing is written by a 1990's AI attempting human speech while running on a toaster. Bad. This is actually kinda sad. The good parts are the premise and the grammar is passable. That's about it. How to fix this mess is easy. First you have to realize that the reader can't see the cool bits and bobbles happening in your head. The cool stuff your mc does should be written down the mistakes that have an effect on him should be written down. The same goes for all important characters. Sex appeal is a crutch you can lean on pretty easily. The first arc is meant to sell your reader the characters and premise you created. Keep it simple. Less is more in this case. Characters should be as human as you can possibly make them. Even the epic heroes of the past still have fatal flaws and personality. Keep reading good books. Last but not least don't stop writing any skill is impossible to perfect the first hundreds of hours you spend on it, but that's the toll you pay to maybe become the next J.R.R. Martin or Tolkien. Maybe even Rowling but try not to go too insane like that one. Hope this gave you some much needed criticism author.
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great story.... however it is yet to be seen if he will finish this or go on hiatus, most (almost all)fanfic's never get finished. sgegadgkddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
It is a very nice story love how the author has taken pre-existing storyline to develop his own story , I would stress on this point because the main thing about any book that is being read is for the reader to be able to imagine the story . In this story that is easy because there are movie and your own favorite person who has portrayed it and you can just imagine them . I would love it if the author could update 1 chapter everyday , but what is happening now is also very comfortable and hope the author won't drop this book and fight through all the negatives and appreciate the positives and the love the fans and reader of this book can offer .
While everything else is passable, the author needs to work on his grammar for the story to flow. There are several times descriptions of parents or other stuff is unnecessary because it doesn’t contribute to the story at all. Like i don’t need the description of both his parents unless the mc is going to bone them both in his bed.
I only read till chapter 3 I am sorry to give a low recommendation but this is because I am someone who believes in the line THE CHILD SHOULD NOT PAY FOR THE SINS OF THE FATHER and this is exactly what you did in chapter 3 I don't know if u changed this in later chapters and I don't want to know Even though DC is dark I honestly would have kept reading if the person who ordered their death was a villain but u make it the Mc father and that is just something that doesn't sit right with me
He got a brain like Stark's when he was just an embryo, only can. Oh no ... it may just be that he is just an idiot and no matter what his brain capacity is, he will remain a mongoloid. Ele conseguiu um cérebro parecido com o do Stark quando era apenas um embrião, só pode. Oh, não... pode ser que ele só seja um idiota mesmo e não importa a capacidade do seu cérebro, ele continuará um mongolóide.
The story is bad, there's nothing more to it. The author has a mediocre grasp of the English language and has an annoying habit of writing meandering redundant sentences. The cannon characters' characterizations are poorly executed, to the point that I'm wondering if he's had anything more than a passing familiarity with the material. The main character is a bad guy a villain if you will, not an anti-hero. He murders and tortures people as a first resort, and only cares for his own benefit. His supposed care for his family is shallow, barely skin deep. And the dialogue waffles between barely believable and so edgy I'd have it cut my lawn. Pass if you value your time.
............................................... Sorry for the correction, but I'm quite sure that Tony stark, vibranium and phoenix force in the synopsis is not DC' stuff. It's from Marvel. So I think It doesn't match the title. . . . CMIIAW ...................... ...................... ......................
Not really enjoying the way things seem to be developing with the latest chapters. So a break of sorts seems to be in order so I thought reviewing now would be as good a time as any. With the most recent chapter (66) I've finally decided to back off until more chapters amass to possibly update or review at a later date. This story like so many others of a similar type( system, opmc, si, universe hoping, and most recently things seem to be pushed towards a possible harem route) is best described as scatter brained. Rather than building up the characters or world the plot seems to randomly be jumping around with little direction other then the typical underlying goal of most stories which is getting stronger. The writing quality leaves quite a lot to be desired but the fact the author (I believe) isn't a native English speaker excuses some of the confusion in that regard. Chapter lengths are fairly short which is a plus if you only have a few minutes to read. The updates apart from the first month, amount to around 4 chapters a month, so loosely a chapter a week. Development of the story is slow to say the least. Things the MC wishes to protect are seemingly thrown to the way side. As a result their characters haven't really been developed other then occasional mentions as the focus of his aim to gain more power. The worlds that have been introduced so far are from Comics and Movies so a lot of the world building included is heavily drawn on knowledge outside of the story itself. Much like the characters the world isn't very descriptive or immersive. Overall the story can be an entertaining read if you can look past some of the chaotic choices of the author and MC.
