funny christian jokes and stories

A priest, a pastor and a rabbi were discussing what they do with the money they collect from their congregations. The priest said, 'I draw a big circle on the floor, throw all the money up in the air, and whatever lands inside the circle, I give to God, and whatever lands outside, I keep for myself.' The pastor said, 'Well, I do the same, but I draw a much smaller circle.' Then the rabbi said, 'I don't do that at all. I just throw all the money up in the air and whatever God wants, He keeps.' This joke plays on the different religious figures and their attitudes towards money in a humorous way.

Here's a joke. A pastor was visiting an elderly parishioner. As he was leaving, he said, 'May the Lord watch between me and thee while we are absent one from another.' The old lady replied, 'Well, don't drive too fast. He can't see both of us at the same time!'.

Joke: What's the best Christmas present in the world? A broken drum, you just can't beat it! Regarding a story, in a small parish, there was a family who couldn't afford a big Christmas dinner. The other church members found out and secretly prepared a whole feast for them. When they delivered it on Christmas day, the family was overjoyed. It was a beautiful display of Christian love and the spirit of Christmas.

Another joke. What's an IT expert's favorite place? The space bar. Because it's always so spaced out.

Of course, I can collect some funny stories and jokes for you. Here are some examples: 1 A man went to the movies and realized he had watched too much, so he said,"I can tell this movie is so bad." Another said,"No, you just heard all the rhythms." 2 A man said to his girlfriend,"I like you a little." His girlfriend said,"So much?" I don't have any." The man said,"No, I just like your smile." 3 A man asked his girlfriend,"You have a little blue eyes." His girlfriend said,"Yes, I ordered blue glasses." The man said,"No, I'm just saying that I have blue eyes and you have blue glasses." 4 When a man heard that he often chatted with a young man, he said,"I think the coolest thing about young people is that they are a little fat." The subject said," No, the coolest thing is to experience some surprises." The guy said," No, you're not as cool as me. I've been through some of the coolest things, like being thought of as a princess." A man asked his girlfriend,"What do you like about me?" His girlfriend said,"I like the way you talk to me." The man said,"No, what I like is that you can understand me." I hope these jokes can help you satisfy your needs!

Here's a joke. Why is rugby like a tea bag? Because it's only strong when it's in hot water! Hahaha.

Here is a joke. Why is the doctor so angry? Because he has no patience.

Here's one. A doctor says to a patient, 'You're obese.' The patient says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor replies, 'Okay, you're ugly too.'

Another joke is: What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo? A turkey that can pluck itself! These kind of jokes add a lot of humor to the Thanksgiving spirit.

Here's a funny chicken joke. Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide! It's a simple play on words that always makes people chuckle.